Freya: Bae queen, I LOVE GER SO MUCH LIKE. SHE IS TOO GOOD AND TOO PURE FOR THE WORLD. I'm just glad this group isn't as mentally fucked up as the others and everyone seems to genuinely enjoy the conversation going? Everything was effortless and went out smoothly. Giles JUST NEEDS TO BE LESS MEAN TO FREY. FUCK DONT FUCK WITH MY GIRL FREYA OK U SULLEN BITCH? I cANT BELIEVE SHE WAS GOING TO DRINK ACTIAL PISS. I MEAN ISNT SHE LIKE? HIGH CLASS OR SMTH. THATS A FUCKING TABOO
Shane is so good. I like how he had acknowledged his fuck up. BUT BITCH IMMA STILL KILL U IF I WERE THERE. I CANT LIVE WITHOUT WATER THE FUCK?

Alaina, fake ass snake. I literally cringe so hard when I read her name, EVEN HER NAME IS A TRY HARD LIKE GOD. I'm gonna punch a wall, she gets on my nerves. And on top of that she is a mf hypocrite "Anabel's a kiss-up, sickly sweet to impress her superiors and make people do things for her" THATS LITERALLY YOU ALAINA UNLESS U HAVE NO SELF AWARNESS? BRUH
I gotta admit the plot twist with Sonya is so good? So kudos on that. Trina is probably going to be sacrificed to the gods. Either that or it has to do with her snitching or smth. Either way she should just die tbqh

Monica, MY BITCH MONICA, SHE SINGLEHANDEDLY ROASTED THAT CREEPY ASS MOTHERFUCKER JACKSON TO THE NINTH CIRCLE OF HELL AND BACK. I mean I will never be that savage, I really like how similar gwen and her are, they should team and kick the asses of these oblivious teenagers tbh. The last part had me cracking WAS THAT SARCASM. I LOVE U FREYA

Jeremiah, "I'm not ready for things like taxes and employment and mortgages. Part of me is still six years old and incapable of doing anything on my own. The other part is about eighty. And neither of them are any good at writing." Literally #me. Audrey shut the fuck up. Bitch prolly wrote a poetry about how her pc's screen is dirty #deep.
Anyway I still love Jeremiah and Im this fucking close to killing Sawyer tbqh, nobody harasses my kid and gets away with. SO SHIT IS GETTING REAL OMG. how do they know all these personal information? I mean they could know their history and some intimate details but GAWD they have some good psychologists now don't they?

Yuto, I CANT WITH YUTO LIKE EVERYTHING HE DOES STRAIGHT UP CRACKS ME UP LMAO. HE KISSED HIS OWN HAND, TAKE THAT ZARA. All that sass and provoking, no wonder he's my fave. I like how everything escalated quickly from a lighthearted conversation to dark one. I expect the next chapter to be more dark and serious. The game is beginning to unravel and I'm excited yet dreading this moment AHHHHHH BITCH GIVE ME MORE

Sorry for the late reply, LIFE IS A BITCH. but i have more free time now so i will review yay. Every miserable accident (which is literally not but they are spoiled aS FUCK) that happen to these kids just make me laugh more and more. I'm horrible, I know. I feel like Id get along with Milo just fine, which is saying alot, btw if he is not audrey's benefactor I will kill myself. Jk ill probably cry more than Simone when she misses her beauty routine but ill get over it. Hopefully.

Anyway LETS ROAST SOME CHICKEN. I MEAN HOES.

SIMONE, I WAS FUCKING SHOOK at the beginning of the chapter because I thought, genuinely (oh god) That Simone might not be that bad? I mean she has to share a room with that snitch ass bitch Trinaand a total British weirdo so like, its understandable if she complains and she managed herself quite well until she started fucking talking endlessly about how she needs to look perfect and HOLY FUCK IS SHE SHALLOW...skipping classes BC she they simply don't align with her good hair days is a fucking record ngl. LMao she got what she deserved at the end. Thanks Shane.

Dane, THIS GUY LEGIT. .ASS. like on one moment I'm like hey he's a nice guy but the next minute he becomes a condescending trash. And so forth until I'm like unable to make my mind about him fuck. ALSO DORAN LMAO. he's great I love him so much. The last part part #drama. I can't believe SAWYER FUCKING KREBBS SAVED A LIFE. everyone is probably shook. Like I'd take that from Milo but not Sawyer. Bitch's a serial killer in the hiding
Shane u r in mmmmmmmm deep shit

Gwen, "By the time we get someone around to fix it, you'll all be gone, anyway. It's not worth it." Jfc Baptiste lighten up a little will ya?, I really liked his interaction with Gwen. It's better to see her out of Yuto's shadow, she is very mature and serious, a rebel with a cause, which is really refreshing because we all know how rebellious teenagers are usually portrayed as impulsive airheads. So yeah I really like Gwen and I'm looking forward for her killing Shane LMAO. Ngl what he did was Stupid as fuck. You could have fucked with anything yet chose the water? literally this guy is an animal

Eimer, ASS PEC, LMAO literally what's in the water they drink? (no pun intended) These students are as crazy as can be . Anywho Eimer, you Can do better my girl, I'd rather have you sit with fucking Quincy than Alaina tbh. She was so rude to her and her fucking passive agressivness makes me cringe. God I'd have slapped her. I mean Eimer is too dumb but give her some credit, she GOT NICE TITS. AND A BIG HEART. being away from is what probably made her the school's slut which is such a shame. I genuinely like her and how she managed to answer the two questions. Kinda good for a girl who doesn't know what aspect means. ASS PEC LMAO IM STILL HOLLERING GOOOOD. WAIT TILL BRANDON HEARS ABOUT THIS

Chanel, tan and well-groomed, like the rest of him. SToP CHAN DONT CHECK HIM ITS INAPPROPRIATE.
on a more serious note I'm very proud of Chan and the all the way she has come along. But its still apparent that this bitch ass Wes still has some sort of control over her, he is a sensitive nerve. I wish shed kill his ass in the games what a fucking douche. Go Chan kill his abusive ASS NOW
I'm just glad she came to her senses and managed to overcome his toxic presence. Yas that's my girl

#audreywakethefuckupplease

Teach me your dialogue secrets. Please. Especially for the ditzy characters, every line they say is gold.

Also, Yuto is my hero. This kid man. He's the best.

Alaina's fake ass needs to die asap she's is evil.
Jem baby is so beautiful and pure. FUCK U SAWYER STOP SCARING MY KID.
YUTO LMAOOOOOOOO I LOVE HIM HE IS SO FUCKING HILARIOUS I CANT DEAL. LITERALLY HE SHOULD WIN. LIKE IDC HE IS A GOD

PS: Uni will be over next week so YAS I WILL DROP A SERIOUS REVIEW. BUT HALLELUJAH I DIDNT EXPECT AN UPDATE
PSS: WHERE IS MY AUDREX ANGST SMFH

MY DADDY IS GONNA SUE YOUR DAD

Totally forgot I had two more chapters to go, whoops. Not much different to say from my last review, besides gushing over your writing again. I don't know how you do it man, but you write characters/dialogue/inner thoughts so freaking well. Every one of these guys is unique, and they're all just a bit larger than life so as too be interesting while also being super realistic and oddly relatable at the same time. I don't know how you balance it, but it's incredible, so kudos!

All those SYOT recs and you didn't even mention your own! I know this is a rewrite (continuation?) of another story that I haven't read, so I'm a bit out of the loop, but this is still so awesome. Your writing is fantastic man, especially with your characters - they feel so real. It's funny you say you're still trying to find your voice, because I think you've done such an amazing job giving each of these guys their own vibe that changes with every POV.

Also, don't even get me started on your dialogue.

"Your mom took you home, Giles"

"If it was that important to you, you would have cried about it already"

"Grab your dumb drawings on the way out, I don't want to deal with your shit"

"if you don't know how to play this game by now, then you shouldn't be graduating"

I'm crying, like actually, these were so good, they made me laugh out loud. Shoutout to Milo for being my ultimate fave - which is good 'cause he's not a tribute so he hopefully won't die.

Anyways, I'm gonna keep reading, but I had to mention your dialogue skills after this chapter, it was so good. Loving this so far!

I decided to take a look at my girl Trina after seeing your pm!

You're doing a great job with these guys! I actually enjoyed Brandon a lot in this chapter for some reason, he was pretty funny.

Sorry for the short review but keep up the good work!

Hey! That was a quick update! Nice to know you're not abandoning :D Need some bloodshed.

Alaina: She's not someone that I'd be friends with. If she was my classmate we probably wouldnt have talked more than twice, but you did a good job at capturing someone like her, who sees everything as if it was a competition, constantly juzging others. Maintaining that image of hers also requires talent and some traits not everyone has.

Seraphina: I feel sorry for her, she's making such an effort to get close to someone, yet she is struggling. I guess she hasnt actually tried too hard before this. Quieter contestants always fade into the background at first because of how subtle they are. Hope to see her shine later, I like musicians. Its funny how no one seems to be enjoying the camp much, Alex seems to be so bored, there's too many people for Harper's liking, even Jackson is frustrated, no one seems to have anything nice to say xD Baptiste is so creepy...

Harper: ooo the British girl! Unlike Seraphina, she seems comfortable just by herself. I liked Simone's appearance xDDD Harper is too judgmental, but at least she admits later that she's being too harsh, as they don't have the experience she has on climbing. Yeah, what she did was pretty stupid, but it must be frustrating to be there, everyone so rude and controlling. Can't blame her for feeling like going beyond the limits, even if that had consequences...

Yuto: I went to find images of Naha, he lives in a beautiful place, I loved those beaches and gardens. Yuto is great, I like him and his thoughts were quite interesting And Trina is kinda all right to, I remember when I read her entry I wasn't too fond of her. They make an hilarious couple. So Harper is going to start the competition with a twisted ankle, well, she could've done better with that skills of her but nevermind. They said there will be consequences for breaking the rules. GG Harper.

Gerard: WHy do I have a soft spot for characters like him, so hopeful and slightly naive aw T_T I want to hug him. I forgot his placement, but I want him to far because I really enjoy reading about him. But also I don't cause that means he's going to suffer and he's a cinnamon bun I don't want him to suffer. Definitely I love Yuto and Trina together, they're hilarious. And Yuto omg! I never thought I'd say this but I feel slightly sorry for Zara. Hmm... The missing water stuff is weird and still Gerard thinks its for his own safety, he's so cute. Didn't he find it weird that they didn't give them an explanation?

Jeremiah: I've got a soft spot for artists. They always have a vast and detailed inner world, they tend to see the world under a perspective I really enjoy. Even when he doesnt share his views on something, like getting excited for a manicure session, he can appreciate the enthusism of others over it. Freya is pleasant enough. I dunno why, I also like these kind of tributes, pleasant but useless. I just wanna hug them. Knowing where they're going and why, the last part was creepy, seeing them so happy and excited about it. It's going to be so creepy when they realize the truth (And I'm gonna love it). Giles is one of the ones I liked the least, from the blog. But still not too excited about it. Being the new kid, he hasnt bonded with the others yet, apart from Quincy for what I see. But I dont imagine them being too loyal to each other.

Shane: Well, it seems I was wrong, not everyone is excited about this, in fact it seems that most of them are angry xD Well, I'm glad he's going to put his time to good use and start looking for trouble. Hope he still has some molly left. Yuto is going to be hilarious, I remember the general theme of Darkest Desires revolved around stereotypes. He seems like he's going to be every single one of those Japanese stereotypes. Starting with the overly attached to technology one. I remember reading about the two buses in the first chapter, but I thought both would go to the same place. Will they meet before the game starts? Would be cool if they met already in the battlefield.

Mariana: I think what I enjoyed the most is that mischievous trait of hers. The way she was rubbing in other ppl's faces how excited she was about the trip. It's just harmless banter, and well Jackson was kinda asking for it. Poor guy. xD

Madison: Oozes innocence. Well... Sawyer here is suggesting otherwise. I remember Sawyer from Blood Money, he surely doesnt fit in the position, they're already starting to notice weird things but no one is raising any questions just yet. They're rich kids, I'd imagine some of them to demand some standards... but it seems that little threat has been enough to shut her up.

Gabrielle: I must admit I know nothing about American football or rugby. And I have no idea what a quarterback is although I've heard that word before. But yeah, sounds cool like strikers on soccer or something. She sounded a little too aggressive at first, but I like her passion for sports and the fact that she's so proud of what she can achieve. Chanel and her... Yea I could see them clashing. LOL at Brandon's comment xDDD And the end of her POV was hilarious. It definitely made up for that nagging part of her.

I want to see Brandon!
Song recs? Hmm... Kasabian's Fast Fuse?. Was just listening to it.

I actually love this omg

YAS ITS HERE

BLAH BLAH BLAH I ALWAYS SAY THE SAME SHIT. I STILL ADORE UR WRITING AND THIS IS FAB AND I LOVE FOR CONTINUEING THIS. IM MORE GOOD AT BASHING TRIBS

LETS GET ON WITH IT

TRINA; fuckING FUCKASS SNITCH SNAKE WHORE FUCK HER
literally; the minute she yelled at jeremiah i was like, FUCK U I HATE U BYE; nobody yells at bae and gets away with it, the fuck? anyways its clearly that Trina has some confidence issues and internal conflicts going on with her and she's tryina cope by being a botch; still doesn't excuse her behavior ew, she literally snitched on Gabrielle; WHY THE FUCK HASNT ANYONE STOOD UP AGAINST HER IM SO MAD,
BTW DID BRANDON PLAY WITH SIMONE WITH FUCKING DISH FOAM? I KNOW BRANDON IS SO THRISTY HED PROLLY FUCK A PIG WHEN DEPRIVED, BUT BABY DO NOT GO NEAR FUCKING SIMONE? SHE IS A HOE AND AN UGLY HOE AT THAT WHO'S VERY VERY VERY NASTY
IF YUTO SEES HIM HE'LL FUCK HIM UP
LIEK
NO

Juliet; her POV was tame compared to Trina's lmao; nothing really major happened here and Juliet's character isnt particularly interesting, but DO I HINT A JULIET X MONICA THING COMING UP OR IS IT JUST MY THRISTY SHIPPING NATURE? hmmmmm I LOVE THE CONCEPT LIKE GIRL YAS; anyways marian can choke? because like if u dont like their company, get the fuck outta there tbh, she's so annoying; unfortunately no milo to roast her today UGH, WHERE R MY EPIC MILO ROASTING SESSIONS AT ? #bringbackmiloroasting

Jackson, THE CREEP, why is he so creepy i literally cringe whenever he makes appearance, like bye, AT LEAST WES HAS AN IDEA WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON; everyone is zoning out tbh; I have this feeling that wes isn't gonna leave this that easily and will dig deeper into the subject; im smelling drama bruh and I LOVE IT; BRING WES THE DETECTIVE INTO ACTION, ALSO I LOVE DANE? LET HIM LIVE GUYS HE JUST WANTS TO HAVE GOOD TIME WES STOP BEING EDGY
NFSKDJKSD WILMA FUCK U U DONT JUST FUCK STUDENTS AND GET AWAY WITH IT, where's simone when we need her? EXPOSE JACKSON AND WILMA NOW, LET ALL THE DOORS TO HELL BE OPEN,
TAKE THEM TO JAIL JSDJGJDSGDFS

BRANDON; I LOVE MY BISEXUAL ICONIC SON SO MUCH?; seriously I NEVER THOUGHT HE SWINGS BOTH WAYS GOD BLESS? HE LITERALLY WAS EYEING JEREMIAH AND WES GET OUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT LMAO, STOP CHEATING ON YUTO AND GWEN BRANDON THATS NOT COOL. U BELONG WITH THEM, anyways so they were playing cards? YOU KNOW AUDREY WOULD FUCK Y'ALL IN THAT CUS SHE IS A VEGAS BABE; y'all can't stand a chance, that of course when she gets her lazy ass to play in the first place, anyway i love Brandon so much but like holy hell dude the story should be R rated for him alone xD damn. I can't believe Eimer rejected him? WAIT DOES SHE HAVE STANDARDS? BRUH EVERYONE IS SURPRISING ME ZJHQDJQDG GET REKT BRANDON;
i can't believe he invited Blake to sleep with him
i can't
this guy
HE WOULD SLEEP WITH LITERALLY QUINCY IF HE HAS HIS WAY
LIKE
BOI CHILL; fukcing hell i love him so much; he's so funny and his lines always kill me, so what he can't control his hormones? it's just makes him even more likeable, though i'd prolly avoid him in real life

AUDREY, MY DAUGHTER; sweet baby just wants peace y'all, who tf thought it was agood idea to put dis lazy bish with the most extra ppl on the camp, literally she'd prolly end up killing them both before the real shit starts even
i mean,
kshsdhhdh i love how u wrote her its so good, she loves sleep so much that she has literally forgotten about Alex all together, SCREAMING audrey x sleep is the real otp im sorry i dont make the rules
ALSO YES FOR MORE CHANEL X AUDREY BONDING

KSDSHD SORRY THIS IS LATE, i hope you have a great time in the retreat AND TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED BC IM CURIOUS NOW TBH

WHERE IS SHANE

SHANE PLS DONT BURN ANYTHING
OH MY GOD

nvm burn simone pls

one month anniversary.

rip any possibilities that we can find brandon, gwen, and yuto have threesomes in broom closets on the regular

Monica - I'm dead "your Mom took you home"...Monica is a savage and you've written this very well. I hope her and Shane become allies, because I can kinda see that happening. Freya seems nice enough, and Giles and Juliet I'm nuetral on. But all good! You did pretty well with Monica, so nice one :)

Griffin - He seems like a much more darker tribute, more down, a little more slow paced. But he sounds like he has more stuff going on, obviously the reason for him lying. But there's something about him that I'm sure we'll find out. But yeah, he's pretty good.

Blake - He seems a lot like the typical competitive jock, but I don't really see much of a twist from the stereotype as of yet. I like his character, since I've seen him around before, but nothing really seemed too interesting about him. I'll keep tabs on him for now, but I'll wait for more of him.

Freya - Freya seems really nice, and her and Jeremiah are pretty close, so I feel like they'll be allies too. Seraphina might tag along as well, so that's always good. I feel like she's hiding something, like there's something she can do that she's just not telling anyone about. Either that or she won't be much of a strong contender.

Alexander - Drugs and medication? Well, we have the druggie XD
Audrey and him were together? Damn, it looks like it was a break-up that didn't end too well. I wonder if one of them will end up killing the other. Or maybe they'll ally and have to cope with each-other? Either way it looks pretty messy.

Good stuff, I'm all caught up, keep it going :)

Alaina - "faker than Eimer's chest" - lol I'm dying okay. Sadly though, I feel like Alaina was kind of drowned out by everyone else so she didn't stand out much to me. It looks like Anabel is back...I like her and hate her at the same time.

Seraphina - I guess she's making an effort, but I don't think it worked out well for her. Again, she seems kind of mellow and less interesting than some of the other students, and so she's not my favourite out there. But hey, she's taking notes and trying to find allies. She's doing better than some.

Harper - Harper seemed more interesting, especially with her interest in climbing. She seems to be interestingly good at stuff like this, but not much really stood out other than that. I feel like she'll either ally with Seraphina or just keep to herself.

Yuto - Yuto's just great. I was thinking he'd be more of a smol bean, but he completely surprised me. Trina and him having some banter was pretty funny, and Harper hurt herself. I wonder if she'll get consequences for that.

Gerard - Gerard is pretty great too! It's nice of him to help out other people where they need it. HA Yuto setting Simone on fire...great stuff, it just shows how rowdy these kids are. They've lost all their water, ooooh! Sounds interesting. Maybe it's preparation for the Games. I can't wait until the start XD