|Reviews for An Unlucky Draw|
| Para-DX chapter 12 . 11/4
Will this continue soon?
| soggy noodle chapter 12 . 9/27
Just got through re-reading this and had to post a review in official capacity.
This story is just that awesome.
I hope life eases up on you some - but not too much; if you finding writing an escape, then how will we get any more delicious fic? ;P
| soggy noodle chapter 12 . 9/18
You had me hooked from chapter one.
Your writing style, your keeping characters IN character and your lack of implementing the overused cliché of whichever character is crossing over just joining up with the other students at Beacon inexplicably altogether made me unable to stop reading.
The only complaint I have is what I voiced earlier; every time there is mention of Cinder between Torchwick and Minato, Minato NEVER asks for any other information on her. Not her appearance, not where they've met up previously and not her known combat capability.
Obviously, Minato can infer that Cinder is female and apparently uses fire. That is all, though. You would think if he's trying to put a stop to her asinine plot for a multi pronged attack on beacon, and by extension, humanity and Faunus, that he would be a bit more thorough in his squeezing his source for all he could.
Roman would likewise WANT to get Cinder offed as much as possible, so why isn't he volunteering this information? 'Crazy bitch' and 'psychopath' aren't physical traits after all.
Gah... it's my only complaint, as I've said, but it's a very annoying one - like an itch on my back that I can't reach.
Anyway, I've said it before but I'll reiterate: I'm really digging this story. I hope you don't drop it.
| guessed chapter 7 . 9/18
I feel Minato dropped the ball either this or last chapter when he was speaking with Roman.
He asked who was pulling the strings and Roman replied with but a name; Cinder Fall.
Minato dropped the ball by not asking for her physical description nor any known capabilities she possessed.
That was rather... shortsighted of him.
| Enlightened Middle C chapter 5 . 9/10
"I don't dance."
I wonder what Dancing Moon Night has to say about that...
| dvilleza chapter 12 . 8/21
I can imagine Minato getting so annoyed that he simply summons the sea of souls in its entirety while staring at Cinder.
| thepkrmgc chapter 12 . 8/12
it should be cool to see where things go from here
| thepkrmgc chapter 11 . 8/12
huh, i wonder if mercury could be turned as well
| thepkrmgc chapter 10 . 8/12
well i suppose having friends in high places helps with staying under the radar, hopefully adam will be executed after his interrogation and not escape like canon roman
| thepkrmgc chapter 9 . 8/12
its interesting to see weiss's perspective, he certainly wont be able to fade into obscurity after this
| thepkrmgc chapter 8 . 8/12
props to roman for having standards for his villainy
| thepkrmgc chapter 7 . 8/12
shame that minato couldnt notice mercury and emerald, I wonder what cinder's impression of him was?
| thepkrmgc chapter 6 . 8/12
its always interesting when the villains arent a cohesive block of evil, roman has potential to shift towards chaotic neutral instead of outright evil
| thepkrmgc chapter 5 . 8/12
so now the main party knows minato, did blake tell them about his weird magic stuff?
| thepkrmgc chapter 4 . 8/12
I think the length of a chapter should be where the narrative is at a decent stopping point, instead of an arbitrary measure of length