Neat.

Funny

Trying hard to avoid thinking that I have two chapters left until the end.

God this story is phenomenal. I’ve loved every second of it

Ahahaha “old married couple”

Gankutsuo, The Count of Monte Cristo, is already a space based rendition of Count. I know it's been years and years since this was written but it reminded me to tell you about it.

You could've named this story "Why I Despise The Asari: A One Million Word Treatise"

This is a pretty gross/disgusting world, but the writing is for the most part excellent. However, the extreme anti-asari bent was noticeable to the point of being distracting. Asari are arrogant and obnoxious, and their hiding of Vendetta was inexcusable. But they are NOT this bad.

I tried to incorporate some of your criticisms into E&D while toning it down a bit - the speech to the matriarchs definitely has a lot of influence from Catalyst.

Wow, what a trip. Thanks for writing!

#(*$ #(*$&O

Miroslav is a male name, to give it to a female its ugh

this is one of the few stories that cause unremitting hatred for the heroes. For the first time, I wanted Shepard to be tortured by Cenobites.

I'm sorry, but hit it kills me XD who knew Harper was a trekkie

I find it funny that turians have a Dreadnaught named like a human city. Astrakhan.

This is one evil humanity. Analogous to the vaccine zombies of today

This is my second attempt at getting through this story. I don’t know what happened the last time around but I guess I got a bit lost between everything. This is a phenomenal story though it was a bit sad the humans turned out to be so evil, I guess that’s what happens when you put the illusive man in charge of remaking humanity, though I was disappointed that Shepard followed suit, I guess it could be a renegade Shepard. Regardless I digress, it was a brilliantly written story, I believe as far as empire building stories go this may be the only format that works, I would have liked a little bit faster plot progression and narrowing the number of perspectives down a bit more but thats honestly nitpicking at this point. I liked the empire building genre and despite the evilish empire this story still kept my interest to the end. I hope to see more :).

Oh a few quibbles, I know you’re probably trying to keep with mass effects you cannot understand ascension but it came off as a bit lazy from the ascended side, I felt I was able to understand most of it and that kindof made them refusing to explain rather infuriating. I found the casual throwing around of killing avatars and humans a bit weird, I think there was mentions of people being executed for suggestions and the proposal of a democracy early on? It felt a bit jarring considering Ashley was also present and also the killing Harper feels like it just slows or risks the project further. There’s a few more but it’s late here, I can’t remember them off the top of my head, and this review is already far too long :P.

TLDR: slow pacing but otherwise great story and hope to read more from you.