|Reviews for Memoirs of the Holy War (Archive)|
| guest chapter 66 . 4/30/2019
Cool chapter, but isn't Ishtore a Fjalar and Thrud minor like Arthur thanks to Hilda? Was wrath the deciding factor?
| Pen chapter 70 . 4/21/2019
This is an excellent story. I was a tad iffy on the rationalization of past villainous acts as some other reviewers have noted, but overall this remains an immersive and high detailed chronicle of FE4.
| Cavik chapter 51 . 4/18/2019
Well, I just finished reading the whole first gen arc, and I've gotta say, I can definitely see why it's considered one of the darkest. I have a feeling Roy was the first lord not to have a dead father as IS's way of apologizing for all the sh*t they threw Sigurd's way.
As for this fix, Alicia is probably one of your best protagonists. Between her relation with Arvis and the whole healer thing, she really brought an interesting perspective to the story.
| Shini Kurogane chapter 70 . 3/31/2019
Finally I catch up, phew. Still, I have a question. Who is Eleri? I check the wikia and googled it, but the name doesn't come up. I assume she is an OC then? Looking forward for the next chapter!
| Shini Kurogane chapter 60 . 3/30/2019
Well, I don't know if this's intentional, but this has been bugging me, so sorry if this feels intrusive. I read on the wikia that Neir and Thrud don't have any Major Blood members in the game at all, or at least until Ishtar for Thrud on the 2nd gen. So technically Langbalt, Lex, Danann, and all of their kids still should be Minor. So yeah, is this intentional? Because if it actually is, then I'm fine with the change. Just want to know the reason, that's all.
| Aspiring Writer 09 chapter 55 . 3/7/2019
I am split on how I feel about this series. I really enjoy your interpretation of how it would feel to have your brother massacre all your friends and family, and then carry on because you don't have a say in the matter. Alicia feels like a logical addition to Fire Emblem 4, as the shrewd healer who recognizes her place from past experience, and learns to become open up to the famity around her that she finds in friends. It was a very realistic showcase of how to overcome mistrust of the world.
One the of the things that I think you could improve in your writing is using different words to convey dialogue. There is repititous use of giggled, teased, and deadpanned. While they are useful in their own right, these words consistently throw off the tone that characters use in speech. For instance, "'I see you are feeling better,' Seliph teased," really doesn't fit, because Seliph is not making fun of Riona, nor is he bring something to light about her that is amusing, mostly to himself. He simply notes that Riona is in a better mood. So a word like mused, or observed would fit much better. This isn't a problem in a short work, but your story is 70 chapters in length, and when you see the same word over and over again, and it's not trivial, the characters get annoying kinda annoying. There were a few chapters that are like dating simulators, and Alicia's dialogue always seems to return to, "We should set them up." It doesn't seem that weird at first, but then she just says in all the time. These are the parts of your story I skip, because you just do the same thing as the first time you hooked two people up, but you change the names of the couple. If you do something like this again, I would not drag out the parent aspect, as to become a parent is not exactly that exciting for how common it is, in a world that could discuss the morality of mass genocide, political intrigue, and betrayal. Being a parent is tedious, but the basics don't really think about the morality of your character and your actions.
In short, less repitive word choice, especially when it is an inaccurate description of tone, and less dating simulators. They detract from the experience of seeing another perspective of a great game.
| Cyberchao X chapter 70 . 2/22/2019
You continue to amaze me. I like that Riona is learning the flaws of her worldview. There's always a danger involved with original characters, and you've managed to hit the so-called 10% every time. It's why I originally vowed to only use OCs for minor characters, not that I stuck to that vow (though in one of the more prominent cases, it was sort of necessary because so few canon characters COULD be present due to it not being an AU.) Still feel I got too Suish on one of them, though I at least had the self-awareness to see it happening and acknowledge my mistakes.
Speaking again from experience, though, I see you struggling more and more with the constraints of a first-person fic. More and more of Riona overhearing things, especially noticeable with the letter needing to be read aloud for Riona to be able to report it to us, the readers. It starts feeling more and more contrived. It's probably why, as far as I can remember, I've never done a prolonged first-person fic with a single narrator. One of my early experiments switched between the two main characters each chapter, I think (it's honestly so long, and a fic that I have so little desire to revisit, that I'm not even 100% certain that the fic I'm thinking of was first-person at all), and my major first-person multi series used a different narrator EVERY chapter, save for the major characters getting the beginning and the end. And even there, I had to have two separate narrators for one particularly problematic chapter where events occurring simultaneously in different locations needed to be covered. Just something to think about.
| LuxBeacon chapter 70 . 2/21/2019
I really loved this chapter. Riona obsessing over all the animals. Her asking questions towards all the adults. The awkward moment where Lene was right next to her learning exactly how Claude died and that she even has a little brother that no one knew about. Lewyn managing to remain cryptic while exposing some more information about himself is definitely him. Also, the serious conversations were SO well done. They really got me thinking, especially when Ares totally turned Aurora's world upside down so she made him interrogator on the spot. It was incredible. I would love it if you were the one to write the Fe4 remake because you've got the theme of the Judrgal games down to a T and even moreso.
| A Bad Person chapter 70 . 2/18/2019
Ah how I missed this story! Another epic chapter that, as always, hit the right notes.
I did have a chuckle about the thought that Seliph could easily disguise himself as a girl when he was younger - in layman's terms he is practically a genderbent Deirdre with blue hair!
| Consort chapter 70 . 2/18/2019
Well, I can't lie. I'd react exactly as Riona did to seeing what I presume was Altenna's dragon. Although, I might lose a finger on attempting to touch, since I've no special gift for animals beyond knowing the trick 'offer food'.
Really says something about the recovery powers of Holy Blood (and magic meds) when Riona took a wound that would normally be a few weeks in recovery at minimum and got up like it was nothing after a day or two. Funny things, stab wounds. They really don't hurt half as much as you'd expect at first. And the best way to mitigate one is to leave the knife in. Weird, but it makes sense.
When you read between the lines, you can actually tell the civilization of Jugdral is quite advanced, with a good quality of life (barring the whole... child hunting thing...). The difference being that where we developed machines to produce large quantities of items, they had magic instead, leading to a wholly different world. How can I tell this? Paper and related objects like books are relatively affordable. Trust me, making paper by hand is only fun the first time. Plus they have actual effective medicines, which indicates time spent recording and teaching that.
Ares getting a lion? ...Is that a nod to his father's title of lionheart, or the fact his father can hit the mystical Fury 7 despite being the calmest man on the continent? Or just a cat suitable for Dain's adoptive grandchild, because we all need a cat that can cause us extreme discomfort by climbing our legs when we're in the kitchen, and a normal cat couldn't scratch Ares?
| Xbro Kong chapter 70 . 2/18/2019
Every time this story updates I take the next 30-45 minutes and just allocate it to reading this. Great chapter as usual
| Ghost of Magic chapter 70 . 2/17/2019
Well holy Naga, this story just keeps getting deeper into emotional territory.
| BlueBlade87 chapter 70 . 2/17/2019
Yay a chapter! It was also good like the others too! But happy late valentines day to you here's my gift for you.
Alicia: Armor Staff
Weapon: Chocolate Roses: when foe is hit by inflict minus 5 atk/spd on them. at the start of every second turn recover 10 hp
Assist: Recover plus
Special: Flamefrost balm "Just one for now."
A Skill: Spd/Res bond 3
B Skill: Renewal 3
"So many chocolates for a healer, guess I could pass them out to everyone."
Chulainn: Armor Sword
Weapon: Thorn Blade: Unit auto doubles when hp is greater then 70%
Special: Luna "So sorry for this!"
A Skill: Atk/Def bond
B Skill: Bold Fighter
"I'm glad to see my family happy on this day."
Caitrionoa: Armor Blue Tome
Weapon: Love Poem: If an Ally is within 2 spaces unit gains plus 3 atk/spd/def/res (I wonder who gave her the poem)
Special: Noontime "Here's to a year of love!"
A Skill: Warding Stance
B Skill: Chill Spd
"I can't believe he wrote this! Ahh! please don't sneak up on me!"
Conall: Armor Green Dagger
Letter opener: If an Ally is 2 spaces away unit gains plus 3 atk/spd/def/red and after combat inflicts minus 5 def and res on all enemies within two spaces. (wonder who he's effective against)
Special: Glimmer "Happy Devotion Day!"
A Skill: Life or Death
C Skill: Panic Ploy
"Maybe I should have Ishtar help me sort these letters."
Anyway hope you enjoy this 'Beloved Family'. (Was thinking about making a Tempest Trail character but couldn't choose between Ishtar or Seliph.)
| The Incredible Muffin chapter 70 . 2/17/2019
Lots of introspection here, and I like it. However, I agree that the heroes have a tendency to be too merciful at times. This might just be me, but if some lunatic is coming at me with a sword, I'm cutting his head off. I'd spare any who surrender, but I'm not taking that much of a risk. Maybe the heroes don't have to be cruel, but they should be a little more stern.
That's just my opinion, and you did a great job with the chapter. I look forward to seeing what happens next!
| LuxBeacon chapter 69 . 1/30/2019
I started this chapter thinking it's be shorter, but obviously I forgot who the author was because this was excellent, full chapter filled with a ton of progress! Ares and Lene finally join the army and we are done with the chapter! We even got mentions about the Thracia story! Keep up the amazing work!