|Reviews for Through Her Eyes|
| Ishkahrhil chapter 16 . 3/25/2018
Holy bejesus that was long, but so God damn fulfilling to read. This story is going in the favorites.
| Trewill91 chapter 16 . 3/24/2018
This chapter was absolutely cathartic to read. thank you. I'd say more, but every part of it elicited the same response of complete and utter satisfaction. You've created a masterpiece with this one.
| DragonTurtle3 chapter 15 . 3/23/2018
I am aware that Chapter 16 has already been published. Seeing that alert yesterday is what got me to finish this review. Maybe my problems will be addressed or acknowledge, but I still want to give my candid thoughts on this chapter as it stood by itself when I first read it.
This chapter had an extremely strong start. One of the strengths of this story is what it is able to add and illustrates what the show originally didn’t; beyond just the altered events pertaining to Ruby’s eyes. That strength of the author really got to shine with this chapter outside of Beacon, where there was room to add in unique and meaningful characters and locations. And all of it was in service to the new series of events that led up to the split between Blake and the team. The twist of Roman using Blake as a hostage to exchange for ruby isn’t a bad event to add in. But Ruby’s response to actually go along with it makes her seem stupid as Hell.
Why would she just go along with an obvious criminal’s demands? Ruby has no way of ensuring he (Torchwick) will keep his word, and she doesn’t seem to LOSE anything by actually calling the police, or Beacon. When Roman makes his call, it doesn’t seem like he has any eyes on her, so how COULD he know if Ruby called anyone? So why wouldn’t she? Does Ruby have so little faith in the authorities to perform a rescue within their own city?
This alternate version of Ruby should trust the hunter establishment even MORE than in canon. She’s not just grateful for being moved ahead two years; Ozpin gave her first real shot of being a professional Huntress in her life. And although it’s not implicitly said, Ruby probably counts on the staff at Beacon to put her down should she irrevocably lose control.
Ruby’s decision making process here is worse than a regular civilian’s. I’m not referring to myself; it would be way too easy for me to judge a fictional character from the outside, when I’m never in any physical peril. That’s a terrible basis for critique, and one I see ‘reviewers’ do to often. I’m talking about stories you can find in the news about ordinary people, who had loved ones taken hostage, and instead of just giving into demands, called the police.
Ruby being 15 years old and panicked really doesn’t hold up as an excuse when we take into consideration she’s suppose to be preparing to be a Huntress. Her career is suppose to be about confronting danger with a level head, and helping people out of lethal situations when they can’t help themselves. Given that this version of Ruby also has to contend with spawning shadow demons at any moment, she should be even more adept. I can’t reconcile the girl at the end of this chapter with the girl from chapter one; THAT Ruby Rose saw a storekeeper with a gun to his face, and in seconds thought of a way to disarm and knock out every assailant, and keep innocent lives safe. She even managed to incorporate her summons into the fight without anyone being mauled!
If I were Ozpin or the Beacon Headmaster , I would be baffled at how quickly her fortitude crumbled just because a person she cares about happened to be the one in danger. I wouldn’t actually expel her, since sending her back home would leave her emotionally vulnerable and away from Beacon’s guidance. But Ozpin should really rethink making her the leader.
If she actually had a plan to escape or signal for help once she had been captured, then my reaction to all this would be different. But not only does she have NO IDEA what to do one she’s in the holding pen, she eventually just curls up and starts convincing herself that this is all just FINE?! So besides trusting that the killer criminal and radical terrorists will totally let a witness go, and she doesn’t need to protect Blake at all, she won’t even try fighting back? Obviously she’s going to lash out thanks to the influence of the Grimm, but that’s not really HER, is it? Ruby Rose doesn’t (or shouldn’t) need the extra push to not surrender in mind, body, and spirit to obvious villains.
The incapacitating despair and cluelessness Ruby is exhibiting is on the level of Sakura Haruno (in series one, before Shippuden).
I understand that Ruby’s low self-esteem has been made clear throughout this entire story, and its potential impact on a combat situation was directly addressed by bringing up the concept of “Chasing The Nightmare.” The myth and reputation of the Nightmare Grimm was a good piece of original Hunter lore, great at illustrating a point, and a good predictor or Ruby’s behavior. But I don’t see that happening here. With that hypothetical situation, the imaginary hunter is putting themselves at risk to at least ACCOMPLISH the goal of a Hunter, and trying to make the world safer. A similar situation is Ren in Volume 4 he as kept charging the Nuckelavee. His thought process was irrational (putting it politely) and definitely going to get him killed. But there was still a GOAL there of making sure that the Grimm won’t kill anyone again. There was something to work towards.
But Ruby doesn’t seem to have a goal consistent with what she’s worked for in this chapter, or the last few. She doesn’t just DO what Roman tells her to do, she’s also thinking and feeling whatever he tells her, which is to accept defeat. Or rather, she’s feeling what the author wants her to feel to enable a scene of forced misery and drama, disregarding who Ruby is. This altered version of Ruby Rose loathes and fears herself, there’s no doubt. But she still has her clear sense of right and wrong, and the urge to fix what she sees is wrong with the world. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t hate her powers so much; she wouldn’t be training herself to be a Hunter in the first place. So lines like “By what right did she have to feel bad? She chose this for herself, so she could save Blake, even if she'd never seen her again!” tick me off. It should be really clear that Roman is the bigger threat to who she loves than ANY behavior she’s exhibited lately. Speaking of that, Ruby’s life has been going better than ever. She’s started the path to fulfilling her dream as a Huntress, has actually made friends, shared the burden of her secret with more people, and was recently even using her summoning powers just to give her partner training fodder! So for what reason would she consider herself a weapon doomed to misery anyway?
Along with Ruby being so dumbed down, this chapter doesn’t end up painting Blake well either. I honestly do understand how the conflict of her soul is making her Aura sizzle out. In all seriousness, this story has been illustrating how Aura functions more consistently and gracefully than Rooster Teeth themselves. I understand that despite Blake’s vow to go fight the White Fang, she still doesn’t know if she can fight her former lover, and doesn’t think it would heal the racial divide in the world. That paradoxical goal is stopping the strength of her true self being brought to bear. But apparently, even when Blake is watching Ruby getting beaten down, restrained, and escorted with a gun to her person, NONE OF THAT is enough for her to focus on what she wants to accomplish?
When we reach the point where Ruby is at the docks and is being led to captivity, and being manhandled, I thought that would be the point where Blake would be sure enough of her intends to bring back her or him. Then the two teammates would fight back for a bit, and be forced back until Penny showed up. But instead, Blake still apparently didn’t know what she really wanted, and Ruby just sits down and waits for anything to happen to her, with no more attempts to control anything in her life. But the attempted despair and hopelessness just feels forced to draw things out.
Along with with throwing me out of the story during a key arc conclusion, I’m also wondering where this story will go from here. Admittedly, I don’t know how long this story will be; for all I know, the author will end this before the Vytal Festival, and chapter 15 is past the halfway mark. But if we’re already having the main character (contrivedly) abandoning all hope by the end of Volume 1, how are the stakes going to be raised for the Breach, or the Fall of Beacon? Is Ruby going to try a full on suicide attempt? Is someone going to be raped? Is Yang going to have her arm AND a leg amputated? The only previous major gripe I had about this story was that the sexuality seemed overblown and in-our-face, for the purpose of trying to seem mature or just titillate to readers. Now I’m worried if we’ll stray too close to the “2edgy4u” boundary.
| Enigma infinite chapter 16 . 3/23/2018
This is story is frankly amazing. Many things are spot on. This is pure gold.
| The Masked Mummer chapter 16 . 3/22/2018
Alternative Title: "The One in which Shit Gets Real (and by real I mean REAL BAD REAL FAST)
Like, there's so much in this chapter that I want to talk about... Like the fighting and action is excellent, the combat dialogue is superb (especially the bit with Weiss and Sun), all the emotion is just so raw wnd powerful, Jaune gets genuinely good moments without drawing focus away from the rest of the cast...
But shit dude...
It's going to take until the next one of these short-novel length chapters drops for me to fully process this one.
TL;DR: "I adore it but also how dare you? My world is shattered."
| Intameticus chapter 16 . 3/22/2018
Never stop. You're the GOAT
| NK02 chapter 16 . 3/22/2018
Every time you come out with a new update it makes me want to read the whole story all over again.
| seanfergus516 chapter 16 . 3/22/2018
this chapter is amazing 10 out of 10, you should be a writer for rwby this was such a change to the volume 1 that is this was animated i would watch this more than once
| Man in Green chapter 16 . 3/22/2018
This chapter has got to be one of the longest that I've ever read. And I loved every sentence of it. Bravo
| metacllica chapter 16 . 3/22/2018
Shit has finally hit the fan. (Another fantastic chapter) :)
This so far has been the best RWBY fanfic I've read so far. Keep up the good work.
| Rorksen chapter 16 . 3/21/2018
Well...that was a long chapter and i bloody loved it. However, I will say I agree with LordsFire that the large endurance fights are poorely paced and it does harm the story.
| LordsFire chapter 16 . 3/21/2018
I have some very mixed feelings here; overall, you are *very* strong at evoking feels as you write.
You're kind of *terrible* at pacing combat scenes though. Your ability to keep the feels flowing makes up for this in part, but when the fights just drag on, and on, and *on...*
It hurts the story. It really does. You can have one grueling endurance fight in a story, maybe two if 'grueling endurance battle' is a major theme of the piece, but that has by no means seemed to be your focus, and this, much like the Initiation battle, just steadily lost engagement after a certain point.
It makes me sad, because your social and introspective scenes are pretty solidly A-class by comparison, where I'd call these fight scenes a C, and that mostly on the strength of your emotive writing.
This much direct criticism is a bit rare for me in a review, but like I said, how good you are at the other aspects of the story really makes this stand out.
| Ultimatrix bearer chapter 16 . 3/21/2018
What was up with the power up? I hope this doesn't turn into one of those Ruby is OP with no justification stories.
KEEP BEING AWESOME!
| qa.test.november chapter 16 . 3/21/2018
Thanks for the fic!
Its the one of the best ones of all, the best one in RWBY section.
Though concerning last chapter I keep wondering why or how Roman is still alive?
I'm talking that he was in the hands of MAAAD Ruby, and the first time she just left him to fetch some cookies. Really?
The second one that confused me - there were tons of cops when they were dealing with remnants of White Fang. but at he end of the chapter, or even when Runy had shown herself on the deck - they have just dropped off the scene. Not even just killed but more likely you forgot about them.
| Zifryt chapter 16 . 3/21/2018
This chapter was awesome, I love how you keep the story is ruby-centric bit you write a little bit for every character.
I'm kinda hpoing that someone make a draw of berserk ruby.
I did not expect her to be this powerful, i tought Salem wanted her because Ruby would be useful to infiltrate Grimm in the city, turns out i was wrong.
Well, back to counting the days till the next chapter
(how are you able to write so much in a month? It's amazing)