I kinda hate when people use a heavily nerfed Shirou. The dude is SUPPOSED to be strong while thinking that he is weak. Not WEAK while thinking he is strong and thus making himself weaker still to “compensate” such bullshit.

I think youre giving cinder WAY too much cred. Shes a petty, grubby bitch who’s soul is probably more twisted than salem’s. She’s an eternal henchman and goon for a reason, and her own attitude and delusions prove what a joke she is. She’s also sent in before tyrian and hazel all the time because shes disposable and salem has no expectations of her. Salem even said as much

How you actually treated ozpin as a legit wizard, unlike RT (who usually treated him like wallpaper), was pretty rad tho

… but then, the dick chair came in and ruined everything

… and the omake happened

Lol

PS: unless your deliberately avoiding it, oz and salem (and the worlds history) are literally THOUSANDS of years old (NOT a century or 2 like you implied) and would give zeltrech a run for his money in age and experience, even if not power

Yang is protective of ruby, yes, but not to that extent or in that way. For a handsome and polite guy like shirou, she would be cheering them on, not relieved at his lack of interest due to his problems. It would be more like “is my adorable baby sister not good enough for ya, punk?”

Also, shirou is forever a harem protag. He isnt uninterested in girls in the least, hes just shy and overly polite.

Maiden powers are definitely NOT comparable to a marble phantasm in any way shape or form. It’s elemancy, a magecraft, and cinder’s was incomplete. Lower end magecraft at most, as even a full maiden cant even destroy something like a mechashift weapon, let alone a freaking noble phantasm of all things, no matter the grade. Even bottom ranked ones are still above any mystic code and are in a COMPLETELY different catagory of their own, not something to be compared to a magecraft or a mere conventional weapon with a fancy gimmick shirou can ONLY alter and destroy his own because theyre native to him and made with his own od, and even then it’s only because he can literally inject od into them, overloading them from the inside.

Also, hrunting pursues targets it drinks the blood of, it has nothing to do with aim. If you want something else, it has to be new or modified like caladbolg II. You dont get to arbitrarily change something as important as a noble phantasm to suit your convenience. It would be like suddenly deciding shiro’s origin isnt sword, not something you get to do as a finfic writer. It’s not an original story, it’s a finfic borrowing from other peoples works. Your job in writing a fanfic is to honor the original works as much as possible, not write whatever the hell you please. It’s disrespectful to the authors youre BORROWING from for your story.

I think you’re being a bit too generous to remnant in terms of power scaling. Maiden magic, especially incomplete, would be a lower end elemancy magecraft at best, and even a full maiden could not casually disintegrate noble phantasms. Dust ammunition is also low grade being mass produced and a consumable, not capable of straining something like rho ais. Its also acknowledged very clearly in the story that magic energy is fundamentally superior to aura, which gives shirou a far greater advantage than what youve shown.

This was a great read, the pacing was well done, the character development was great, and the plot was also building well. It’s sad that this fic hasn’t been updated in so long, but I’m glad that I got to enjoy reading this much of it.

stopped reading as soon as i read the line the grim were pink

I think semblances are more like esp than reality marbles tbh.

I just do not buy the idea that Shirou would use the phone that he got back from an enemy. Malware, spyware, a tracker; did the idea that his phone might be sabotaged never cross his mind?

We know as the audience that this “man in black” is likely Blake, but Shiro doesn’t know that.

I also don’t buy Blake’s miraculous getaways. Come on, being out of his line of sight for less than one second is not enough time for someone to get away from Shirou. His eyes were likely still reinforced, and even without magic still have better dynamic vision than most trained fighters.

The absolute rookie move of attempting an interrogation before even completing capture still blows my mind. It’s like Shiro always gets the idiot ball and makes these small mistakes that I highly doubt he would ever make. Not being able to detect Yang sneaking up on him, being caught off guard by a basic distraction, It’s not that these don’t happen to normal people or that Shiro is omniscient, but he’s way too experienced for these to actually work and be believable. His social ineptitude is one thing, but his perception and combat ability were never in doubt.

I don't really like these fics where the protagonist hides his power, of course he doesn't need to show everything, but I find it annoying when he gets into a situation that could be easily solved if he loosened up more, but he doesn't do that because there are people around, and it reminds me of those stupid Naruto lines like "Naruto is a super genius but hides his power and surprises"

This chapter highlights the problem of Shirou being too open. Who, in their right mind, would just reveal their recent trauma to a girl they've only known for less than a month?

webnovel,wattpad

Shirou is not telling the truth but embellishing and exaggerating quite a bit.

The girls will be very angry at him withholding vital information from them.

It is a shame not to find love with RWBY girls they are all excellent, and he needs a person to keep him in line.

I also wonder will Shirou not find love on this world his desire to play Hero has destructive tendencies.

This world definitely needs Heroes because Humanity is losing to Salem and is a battle of survival.