|Reviews for The Daughter of Telcontar|
| Kili1315 chapter 5 . 2/18/2016
OMG! Leggy and Gimli and Leyadriel! SOOOOO CUTE! God bless you.
| AIK2 chapter 8 . 11/7/2015
I like this story, and I'm dying to see when Le will find more worth than just beauty.
| Phox chapter 20 . 6/29/2015
I know this story is long since been over however, I had to quit here. I barely made it through the rape.
I plan on picking up the books sometime soon but after reading many reviews from readers who have read the books on multiple stories, I do get the general gist of the Elves. I do not believe any elf, let alone Legolas would ever fall victim to the whims of a female let a lone a human female. Holy hell, if his father (Thranduil) ever found out about his son's actions with, I can't remember her name, he would shit bricks. Thranduil dislikes almost everyone besides his own kingdom and I am sure some of it, no matter how small, probably would rub off on Legolas a bit. If it were not for Aragorn, he probably wouldn't care much for the race of Man. However, I have read somewhere that Thranduil isn't as snarky in the book as he is in the movies. But as many reviewers have said, the Elves love once and most certainly wouldn't bed a random female.
I enjoyed the first few chapters because they seemed legit but it took a turn for the worst. Personally, your story almost seems like a made up world of your own but you used the character's names.
I can see how a child would hold affection to someone older, but not the adult. Much like middle school children who find their Literature teacher attractive.
If this is unnecessary attraction of the younger child to Legolas and it annoys him beyond belief, I an pretty sure that the source (Legolas) should/would confront that little girl and put an end to her annoying affections.
I could see this conflict between the two sisters if they were not related, but I don't see it between family relations. Then again my mother always said, be lucky you are not royalty back in those days, everyone is out to kill you, or at the least harm you or use you. Think of Queen Elizabeth, she refused to marry even though men were throwing themselves at her so they could be king.
But she brought upon what is called "The Golden Age" to England because she made it the most prosperous and a huge force to be reckoned with. All done without a man in what is supposed to be a man's job. She lived and ruled well beyond her sister's rule of, I believe 4-5 years with her 44 years. This is what I would call a strong woman/queen (She had a terrible past well worse than your main character) and I certainly don't see any strong traits in your character that suggests a strong queen let alone a ruler of Elves. She would not live long enough to become an Elf ruler like Galadriel as almost all Elves left soon after the War of the Ring. I believe Imladris left first, then Lothlorien and then The Green Wood (Mirkwood).
And as another had stated, all of Arwen's and Aragorn's children would be Half Elves or some portion of Elves as well as I believe Aragorn's bloodline has some Elf blood in it thus is why he would live longer than a normal human would. So in reality, the Dead that haunts your character because of being an elf would have also haunted Aragorn as well.
But putting history aside, your story makes little since and overall incorrect.
However it is not horrible as I have read far worse. I am not a fan of our world to their world stories as most authors tear everything up as I doubt that a normal college girl has any fighting ability to give for the Fellowship and would in no way be aloud to go. She would be a burden. These situations usually end up with the character magically getting magic powers (haha). The few that I do like are very humorous and will keep me reading or the character is very plausible and is sent into a situation or environmental that she can actually fit into. If those characters were paired with characters much like themselves then it would seem more reasonable. Such as an elf that isn't necessarily used in fighting such as Lindir (he was in the first Hobbit movie) or Erestor. However basing things completely off the movies can be bad such as Haldir did not die in the books but he did in the movie.
But again, your story isn't horrible but it is not the best. I don't spew out information just to bombard you, but more as to provide knowledge that you could use later. But everyone does have their versions of the characters, as far fetched as they are and like them, I have mine. As far as Merry Sues go, Elves in general are Merry Sues as they have practically zero flaws. Both physically or mentally. As they all seem to excel at SOMETHING and are not bad at anything really. So yes, in my eyes Elves are Merry Sues in general and in order to make a likable Elf character to set them apart from the others is very difficult as all Elves are beautiful. I always find that as a flaw as they all look somewhat the same.
Anyways, try not to look at this as a flame because god forbid you have enough already.
I am also typing on my phone so my review doesn't seem long to me and may have mistakes in it.
You probably will never see this, but I had to say something.
| Lightening Maiden30 chapter 19 . 6/10/2015
I love your poems in the story it gives me inspiration in my own writing.
| Guest chapter 63 . 2/10/2015
| Guest chapter 62 . 2/10/2015
How dare you write this bullshit story. It's one of the worst fanfiction stories I've ever read. You are such a b*tch.
| TaengOOster chapter 62 . 1/4/2015
This is by far one of the most beautifully crafted fic i've ever read. The way your writing not shying away from the imperfectionsof each characters; each with their own demons, be it the aragorn, legolas, leya, eladren...each embodies their traits with so much convictions. Wont lie though that leyadriel wasnt perfect, but this marred beauty was so like a fighter to me. Her growth throughout the fic, her innocence at the beginning and guilt at end. Thank you for this, you're a talented writer, please keep up the good work!
| AnneAC chapter 23 . 12/20/2014
I am still wondering why I am reading this story. I like The idea for The story. But there are so much drama that it ruins it. I do not like stories with rape in them, I dont. The main character, beding with that boy, its kind of stupid. Elves mate for life. They 'marry' when they hace their frst time together. So, its very su this story. The plot is good, but it is toó over dramatic and excesive with all of The bad things that happen to Le.
| BelleCelestyn chapter 10 . 11/23/2014
i remember coming across this title story years ago but I couldn't remember why I never continued reading it. Then I came across this chapter and remembered why I dropped it in the first place. There's just something about rape in fics that doesn't sit well with me. I simply can't continue reading when rape is involved with one of the main heroines.
Aside from that, elves mate for life. If Leyadriel is truly an elf, she mated for life with this boy.
| Random Guy chapter 6 . 10/3/2014
What kind of Elvish are you using? That's definitely not Sindarin or Quenya. You really need to check whatever sources you are using.
| miadu chapter 16 . 6/16/2014
okay. let it be known that i am BEYOND loving this story. i love it love it love it. But Aragorn has been NEGLIGENT. With his two oldest daughters and he needs to start whooping some ASS and laying down some laws like a king oughta because they have become spoiled little brats, especially Ms. "Pheidan". Letting them roam around the wilds alone with boys they already suspect are beating and sexually abusing their underage daughter no guards no chaperone, letting her spread herself for that disgusting boy, and repeated allowing it. Letting them get away with lying, slapping their mom and throwing knives at the kings head throwing shit and screaming at my siblings, destroying the house... I would have my ass whooped so hard i could not get up had i ever done even one of these things. Theyve done them all and gotten ... nothing? Even that little bitch Pengwaith only got grounded to his room for backhanding the Princess of Gondor with all his might so hard she went flying.
ARAGORN WTF IS UP? YOUR PIMP HAND WAS SO STRONG WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO YOU, ARWEN WHAT IN THE HELL ARE YOU SMOKING GET A BACKBONE AND GET YOUR BEAT DOWN ON!
| Guest chapter 42 . 2/22/2014
So I hate you. You are welcome, my only real wish though is to meet you in person, so I can physically and potentially fatally harm you for the direction your story has taken; but sadly my wishes are just pipe dreams.
| Guest chapter 48 . 1/19/2014
Sam never sail to. The grey havens. Only frodo and bilbo amongst the hobbits. So it's kind of weird to see Sam there
| ChristinaAguileraFan chapter 22 . 1/3/2014
By far my favorite chapter so far! :)
| Rowan's Hope chapter 63 . 12/24/2013
I must say... I just read this entire story through, sitting here in my bedroom, and it was one of the most beautifully though out and written tales that I have had the pleasure of reading in a long time. I admit to having cried and laugh many times throughout. I would just like to congratulate you on your magnificent writing skills. Beautiful work, please continue for the world always needs great imaginations and people with new thoughts.