Reviews for Harry Potter, Master of Death
DPinAK chapter 20 . 3/13
Enjoying the story. Hope your muse lets you return to finish it.
salvadorsuarez387 chapter 9 . 10/27/2022
This is turning out really good… I just found this story 2 days ago and I’m almost done… after reading this I will be checking your other stories. Thank you for your time and imagination,,, 10 out of 10 stars…
blcoachmac chapter 8 . 10/14/2022
Tom and Dumbledore are in for a hard ass kicking, especially if they go after Hermione, Luna or on of the parents!
blcoachmac chapter 5 . 10/13/2022
Loving this story!
blcoachmac chapter 3 . 10/13/2022
Harry can win!
blcoachmac chapter 1 . 10/13/2022
Now to get some payback on Tom and Albus!
steve.moore.9081323 chapter 3 . 10/9/2022
Luna early
Jacob Fritzsching chapter 19 . 9/13/2022
Please update your story soon!
ImUpToNoGood chapter 6 . 6/6/2022
The plot is interesting, however, you have a tendency to tell, rather than show. For example,

“ Luna had become attached to Xeno, who refused to let his little girl go. They were just so happy to see each other again.”

Could be rephrased to:

Luna had attached herself to Xeno, who refused to let his little girl go. Both had beaming smiles.”

Little things like this can make the story feel more active, and let us live the story instead of being told what happened.

The cumulative effect of all of the “telling what happened” makes the story feel plodding and is probably the cause of the comments that the story is boring. I don’t think it is, it the storytelling makes it feel that way.

That, combined with the word choice errors make the story feel like something written by a young person or someone for whom English is not the native language.

It has been awhile since these were written, so perhaps your style has improved in the mean time, and my hopefully constructive criticism is no longer needed.

(I do have to giggle at the reviewer who asked who Uriah Heap was. Snicker.)

I know that you are no longer writing these. I hope your life is full of delights, and that the personal reasons you mentioned gave way to joy.
Cassandra30 chapter 19 . 5/19/2022
Good for Harry. What about the pet?
Cassandra30 chapter 18 . 5/19/2022
The anguish of this is devastating.
Cassandra30 chapter 17 . 5/19/2022
You know the girl should just have explained and apologized about the pet.
Way too late.
Cassandra30 chapter 16 . 5/18/2022
Go Sirius!
Cassandra30 chapter 14 . 5/18/2022
What a way to learn!
Cassandra30 chapter 13 . 5/18/2022
Terrific chapter! Intriguing story.
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