|Reviews for Double Barrel|
| Cypher DS chapter 6 . 10/6
Well, Axel's managed to cover that flesh wound with a bandaid, so I guess he can keep chugging along.
I never thought about Tiffany and Kyanna becoming a couple, but I like the argument for their relationship in this chapter. They are close in age despite their different lives, and Kyanna really could do with Tiffany's steadying influence.
| TheTrueOverlordBear chapter 6 . 10/4
This is...quite a mix of sexual humor and drama. Yeah, I guess that's pretty much what I can say at this point. Well, that, and Axel is still in a bad hole.
| Cypher DS chapter 5 . 9/18
Your style of writing brief, staccato sentences really fits Axel's traumatized mindset. In this shellshocked state he's not going to be going to be waxing poetic or having long, coherent thoughts, so the clipped, one line paragraphs fit the bill.
Axel's already let Venus' name slip in front of Tiffany, so hopefully that information will find its way to Kyu and the couple can find a way out of this nightmare.
| TheTrueOverlordBear chapter 5 . 9/14
Normally, I'd be peeved by mid-text Author's Notes, but I'll let that slide just this once, considering the consistently good quality of your writing. Anyway, I can really feel the pressure within Axel, alright. Not bad yet again, yo!
| Cypher DS chapter 4 . 9/5
I thought this would be a colourful sex comedy where the main gag would be Axel's increasingly buffoonish balancing act: how to keep Kyu from discovering the randy love goddess raring to jump his bones, while simultaneously repelling Venus and remaining faithful to his fianace. Instead, Axel is psychologically tormented and raped. Well, I have to say it's an effective presentation. Axel's "numb" scene is rightly terrifying.
| TheTrueOverlordBear chapter 4 . 8/27
Okay, I think I better understand how traumatizing such trouble can be. That, and I guess it really is, at least, a different brand of scary for guys, if not worse. Would women even believe the usual one-uppers called men if it ever happened to men? Talk about going serious, yo.
| Cypher DS chapter 3 . 8/13
This is definitely falling on the 'terrifying' side of comedy, with Venus blinking in and out of existence as Kyu comes and goes. I can't wait to see where this goes, and how Axel will manage to survive until his wedding day.
| Cypher DS chapter 2 . 8/13
Oh yikes! I really dig how you've presented Venus and her omnipotence. The memory trick is such a small act of power, but Axel's terror drives home just how much she can do with such a simple gesture, and for her to continue on from there, listing all the horrible curses and blights she could lay upon him so effortlessly seals the deal.
I'm a little puzzled by all of the line breaks in the scene with Venus. I guess they work to emphasize new images or statements, as if you were cutting to a different visual angle on a TV show, but at the same time they do break up the flow of this single scene. I've also got to give props for the opening wedding planning scene. It's such a perfect snapshot of how goofy and loving Axel and Kyu can be when they're together.
| TheTrueOverlordBear chapter 3 . 8/3
All that worrying feels spot on, yo. Like, for example, all those possibility checks. And Venus...yeah, her whole schtick that she makes the Love Fairies do suddenly makes a lot more sick-causing sense to me now.
| TheTrueOverlordBear chapter 2 . 6/27
Huh. Freaking NTR. Not cool, Venus. I wonder what info Kyu has on her, then...?
| TheTrueOverlordBear chapter 1 . 6/21
Hm, now this is exciting! And it seems like I should be expecting Venus to be an apparently very cool but actually very petty woman, huh? I've been getting that vibe from her for as long as I could remember her...though if Venus would try to cause drama, then how would she throw it at someone as savvy as Kyu? Freaking nuts, what's popping up first in my head when it comes to that are real bitter drama stuffs that Axel and Kyu would tie to the sarcasm chariot and drag along city pathways. So yeah, I'm wonderin' 'bout whatcha gonna bring in, yo~ And I'm honestly feeling nervous about such things, considering how I am with more realistic drama I have to wait for, hahaha...