Reviews for fatalis
Kumiko Eharu chapter 17 . 8/31/2003
*squeels* aahh! i love it. this is an awesome story. wonderfully descriptive and very original. i wish there were more!
Astaldotholwen chapter 17 . 8/19/2003
Oh I loved this story, finally, finally, and I'll say it again, finally a story where Riku is the main character and finds love. Riku being my favorite character made loving this story so much easier, even if it did have me staying awake until wee hours of the morning, I really want to thank you, and I will be looking forward to more stories about Kingdom Hearts and all other fics you right, thanks!

Meiko chapter 17 . 4/20/2003
See? I knew Riku would go back for! I'm a genius! _ ( was really quite obvious that he would...) - -; Anyways, I really loved your fic! And I loved reading every chapter of it! You ended this fic beautifully! Congratulations for a job well done! ::Claps and applaudes really loudly:: And best wishes on your future stories; I'm sure they'll be just as marvelously written as Fatalis! (Now..if only you would take the hint that we all want a sequel to this fic...LOL!) Well, Keep up the excelent work!

KT the Shimmer Skank chapter 17 . 4/20/2003
There is alot of stuff in this story. I could probably go on all day about every little detail I loved and even those that didn't really float my boat. But, I've already done enough of that in my other reviews. Instead I'd just like to say simply that I loved reading this story. It was beautiful, sad, happy, exciting, and thought-provoking.
Nobody123232 chapter 17 . 4/15/2003

Wow, that's a lovely ending. Just lovely. I couldn't think of anything else to describe it. The last chapter was just so fit Deep Dive perfectly. You truly did a good job, no, a great job. Throughout this story, you have put your all into it, which is beyond wonderful.

As I have said before, you have an amazing writing ability. The way you write scenes is so precise, so good that the reader can't help but continue on reading until the very last chapter! It was such a pleasure to read this fiction!

Your tone was lovely and imagery, perfect. I have said this in previous reviews, but I can see the pictures so clearly! It is truly wonderful. Your descriptions are detailed, yet not hard to read at all. Oh, and putting Hikari/Simple and Clean in the ending chapter was a great idea.

Anyway, it's over...your lovely fic is finished. But that doesn't mean I'll take it off my favorites' list.

Good job and I mean it.

You wrote a truly original fiction.

Keep up the great work.

Koorino Megumi chapter 17 . 4/14/2003
It...ended. *eyes fill up with tears* Fatalis is over! NO!

Well, I suppose all good things have to come to an end sometime. And what an ending! Where do I start?

I loved your portrayal of Sora, showing both that he has grown up and that he's still the same kid at heart.

Having Riku and Sora go against King Mickey to save Ava was another surprising plot twist. And I love your plot twists! They're fabulous!

Your ideas with darkness and light are extremely creative! I love the way you ended this, having the universe become a mixture of both. About the keys, though. It seemed your explanation on the keys was a side note at the end (a little rushed and out of place). And I'm a little confused as to how Sora and King Mickey's key could be the same if they both had it at the same time at the end of the game. But I do like that Ava's key is really the one that Riku held during the game and that Riku's key is truly his own. Another beautiful touch!

And the fact that Riku is still blind was the perfect finishing touch! He's overcome this shattering disability and come to accept it as a part of him. Plus, it keeps the story from ending too much like a fairy tale. I love the pervading dark and angsty tone of the story, and I'm glad it didn't completely change at the end. After all, life isn't perfect.

And Riku and Ava are having a child... That's adorable! I do like there to be happiness in the ending, and this balance between good things and bad is just the sort of ending I hoped for. And I'm a fellow Sora/Kairi fan who believes Riku deserves someone, too, so this made me happy.

And beautiful use of Simple & Clean in this chapter! So appropriate! Especially the final stanza at the end...

Fantastic story! I absolutely loved it!
Lana chapter 17 . 4/14/2003
Wai, that is such a beautiful ending ;_;! *squeals and hugs her monitor*

I don't think Ava is a Mary-Sue at all; she has her own personality and is a good, steady character who fits perfectly with Riku. Ava just rocks _.

And I simply love the way how you made the ending like the secret trailer and Deep Dive. Most people think Riku's evil in those movies and fights _against_ Sora, but like you said; Riku isn't evil at all! The poor, misunderstood kid... *sniffles*

Anyway, what I'm trying to say here is that your KH story is absolutely one of my favourites and I really enjoyed reading it. o Good luck with your other stories!
Lana chapter 15 . 4/13/2003
Holy cow! I certainly didn't see THAT one coming. It makes sense though... But still, it's incredibly sad. I hope everything will be alright in the end ;_;!
Nobody123232 chapter 15 . 4/11/2003
:Blinks: :Blinks again: :Eyes widen:

After all that! They're separated? This cannot be happening! Poor, poor Ava! After all they have been through...she's being sent back? How awful...

This chapter though, was absolutely lovely. I mean, wow. I didn't mind that it was graphic at all, and it was wonderful that you decided to warn people first. I thought it added much more to the tone. Really, good job. Honestly, you have such great talent.

I'm happy that Sora finally came back. And it was heart warming and tear-jerking to see Riku that happy. It was really the first time he's been, my...I was shocked at the ending. I was screaming at the computer. Anyway, this isn't the end, right? There has got to be more!

Geez, you're doing such an excellent really are.

Keep up the great work.

Koorino Megumi chapter 15 . 4/11/2003
At the end of this chapter, I screamed. Literally. I know I've been commenting about your plot twists all along, but that was a shocker! I knew there had to be some catch coming or this would be the last chapter, but never ever did I expect that.

This chapter was crazy. Fantastic! It was very graphic (thank you for the warning), and although I'm not really fond of that, it holds with the dark tone of the story. I was squirming and going insane the whole time I was reading this chapter. And especially when I had to stop in the middle and go to class...

The pacing is fabulous! One thing happens after another so the reader experiences this crazy rush and is kept at the edge of their seat the whole time. And the fact that Riku never got the words out... As much as that hurts, I can't help but applaud your artistic writing. It was the perfect touch to push your readers over the edge.

I can't wait to see more of this! Even though it's sad to see it drawing toward a close...
Meiko chapter 15 . 4/11/2003
*Jaw drops down to the floor* Great...first you make Riku and Ava go through that much pain as it is...but then you have to go around and separate them? Honestly, I never really expected THAT to actually happen! Riku going to go back to save Ava? And why the hell didn't he tell her that he loves her before she was pulled away by the darkness? HUH? I mean, I know perfectly well that Riku loves her; it's soo obvious on the way he looks at her and talks about her all the time. (I mean, really, you don't need to be a scientist to see that...) Yet still! I can't help but get angry at Riku for not saying a damn thing! Heck, even Riku can be an idiot when he wants to be...LOL!

So...yeah, I'm done with my annoying rants and raves...soo...see ya! Till next time, Firefly! I'll keep in touch, BTW! _~ Update soon!

moogle stew chapter 15 . 4/11/2003
First off I have to say this: wow. *jaw drop*

This story is simply amazing- as in it's 3:30 in the morning and I've been reading it non-stop. I don't think I've *moved* from this chair the entire time (explains why my butt is numb hehe). But the story in this is awesome- has this dark tone that is somewhat rare in fanfics... most fics I've read are either unrealistically happy or (as someone else stated in a review) events are altered to fit the author's fancy and not remain true to the game. You remained true to the game- even with the small cameos (the baby *iee cute*).

Best part: topless Riku *melts into fangirl puddle of geekiness* (sad, no?)

I hope you continue this fic- I'll keep checking to see if you update it :)
KaitouUsagi chapter 15 . 4/10/2003
oh...that's so sad...poor riku...poor ava.
KT the Shimmer Skank chapter 14 . 4/10/2003
The pacing of this story is simply delicious. It's been a long time since I've read a story on that actually got me on the edge of my seat, always hungry for more. There are ups and downs and always new twists, like a good solid story should have. I also like the rollercoaster that is Riku and Ava. They grew close so fast because they were lonely, then pushed each other away, then read each other's thoughts, then Riku beat the crap out of her... it's all very realistic, not just some sugary fall deeper and deeper in love type thing. I still have mixed feelings about Ava, though. She's sometimes too much of a sweetheart for my liking.
Koorino Megumi chapter 14 . 4/9/2003
Another fantastic chapter! But then again, I expected no less.

So Ansem still exists in Riku's mind. That's something I never considered before, and the implications are interesting. And Ava's experiencing Ansem's memories because of the Portal of Thought. You plot twists really amaze me! Sheer brillance!

And what will Ava be like when she wakes up, I wonder?

I do like reading chapters from Ava's POV, but it was nice to be back to Riku's so that we could see his own emotional turmoil after the fight. Impressive characterization, as usual. Everything you write is just so believable!

And there was only one person that silver-haired man could have been, and I don't mean Ansem.

I can't wait to see where all of this goes!
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