|Reviews for Cursed by Jagged Scars|
| Rasiaa chapter 1 . 8/28/2017
While I hate this pairing, I do think you did a good job with it. I am a sucker for soulmate au stories and I've never thought of this one before. Do you mind if I use a similar idea for a future fic? I'd credit you.
I also really liked the dialogue. It seemed classic and while they were both out of character- it's impossible to not be with pairings like this- you managed to keep enough of their original personalities for it to be believable. Nicely done.
| Maisie Malfoy chapter 1 . 8/27/2017
Okay, Sevmione is not my thing at all, but that's beside the point.
I do want to point out that while I'm fine with it, the whole student-teacher/underage might be triggering or just not something that people are okay with reading, so you may want to post appropriate warnings, as it's just not normal for grown men to fall in love with fifteen year old girls.
That aside, I don't normally go for soulmate!AUs, but this was a nice look at them.
Overall it was an okay read, but I recommend you apply appropriate warnings next time.
| DobbyRocksSocks chapter 1 . 8/26/2017
Before I begin my review, please remember that when posting to the fanfaves, you should warn for any potent triggers.
I'm trying to look past the underage part of this and struggling somewhat, so I'm going to avoid talking about the pairing.
I like the AU you chose to use. It's not a soulmate!AU I've seen before, and I do find it interesting. I also liked the details added about James and Lily.
| Cheeky Slytherin Lass chapter 1 . 8/23/2017
To be completely honest, I find the whole student/teacher thing completely squicky, especially since Hermione is clearly a teenager here. For future reference, it might be a good idea to list underage as a potential trigger when signing up for Fanfaves. As I've said before, the age difference isn't the importance factor in a relationship, it's the point in someone's life that the relationship occurs. For this fic, for example, Hermione is only fifteen, and it is extremely disturbing and quite predatory that a grown ass man would fall in love with her. If she had been an actual adult, later on in life, it wouldn't have been a big deal because she would have actually been at a point in her life where such an age difference wouldn't have been a big deal.
That being said, if I ignore the pairing, I found the soulmate trope used here quite original. It makes me wonder what makes a certain sentence or phrase important enough to appear on their skin, since, obviously, every sentence can't appear. I do like the inclusion of past soulmates being a thing.
| The Quidditch League chapter 1 . 8/18/2017
I do appreciate the eeriness of the opening scene here. The good old knock on the door and then it opening. Even though cliche, I really like it actually. I also appreciate Severus' distaste at the moment for her - very in character.
I'm not sure I buy the fact that Hermione would attempt to use Veriteserum on Snape. I mean, he is the Potions master and (as you have stated in here) he worked it out immediately. I truthfully think Hermione would realise that and wouldn't even attempt to do such a thing. It seems like more of a thing Harry or Ron would come up with and she'd logically explain why it WOULDN'T work.
I admit that it took me a while to understand what it was that was actually happening, but by the time Severus got the words on his arm, it started to click. I'm, personally, not really a fan of these types of fics (with any characters at all) but I'm genuinely very intrigued by this aspect of it. I felt it was written fairly well here too.
You had me worried for a moment that she was about to undress herself for him and I was about to scream about how there was NO WAY she'd do that, but I was relieved to read on that she wasn't actually getting naked, but was showing her own soulmate scar.
Oh, so there are multiple soulmates here? An interesting concept. And how they can fade and you can lose them. Intriguing. No wonder Severus is hesitant (minus the fact Hermione is a teenager).
For a Sevmione soulmate!AU (I dislike AUs a lot) I didn't mind this. I think you had some interesting concepts in here which made it that little bit more unique. I did notice some SPaG errors, particularly in dialogue, but they read more as English isn't your first language and as someone who his trying to learn a second language, I am very forgiving haha.
Overall, a good job!
| isaacswolfsbane chapter 1 . 8/15/2017
First, I'd like to apologise if this review isn't the best. I really can't get behind Snape/Hermione as a pairing and all student/teacher pairings completely gross me out.
That being said, up until the point they started to get more intimate, it wasn't a bad read.
This was really well written and I can tell you've given it a lot of thought because the characterisation for both of them was spot on.
I loved how you described the scars, too. You gave us just the right amount of information about them and showed how they work on more than just the singular level (with Snape having two and both him and James getting them for Lily) so the reader knew exactly what was going on.
Great job :)
| Emiliya Wolfe chapter 1 . 8/3/2017
This is a really interesting idea that I don't think I've seen done before. I'd like to know if there is a reason why some words are etched onto skin and some aren't. I also like the fact that someone can have several soulmates, so you're not disrespecting the absolute love Severus had for Lily.
I noticed some SPaG errors:
"Her hair combed in even curls..." - sentence doesn't have a verb. Either put a comma instead of a full stop at the end of the sentence before [her robe, her hair combed...] or add a "was" between "hair" and "combed" [her hair was combed]. The same applies to the sentence "Remembering when Potter first..."
"mudblood" should be capitalised
"parent" - should be [parents]
Your flow is also something that could be worked on. Try using different length sentences in the same paragraph, and making more complex sentences, and I think this fic could be really good.
I also enjoyed the fact that Snape and Hermione have the same personalities as in canon. Quite often, Hermione will be seen as a very confident young woman, but she's actually very anxious in relation to her feelings/her physical appearance. Good work :)
| playwright82 chapter 1 . 7/10/2017
Great start. I can't wait to read more. Will we learn anything about the soul mates and how they find each other?
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/3/2017
Great first chapter, please keep writing and update when you can.
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/3/2017
| Petite Mule chapter 1 . 7/4/2017
What original start! I have never read about scars like this and I have read a lot of ffstories. You hook me! Thank you.
| ndavis77 chapter 1 . 7/3/2017
This was a great first chapter. I loved how you portrayed his struggle. He's not an easy character. I'm really looking forward to reading more!
| SiriusMarauderFan chapter 1 . 7/3/2017
Thank you so much! I absolutely love soulmate!AUs but I've never read this take on it. It was really interesting and I look forward to reading what you do with it in future chapters. Your characterization was perfect, as well as Severus' struggle with accepting Hermione. I loved how you worked in the prompt too. This is beautiful! :D