Reviews for The Spider
Guest chapter 30 . 10/25/2022
So I have read up to ch 30, and while the author has started using incredibly shitty tropes that near-universially reviled, I want to draw attention to the human torch dating Liz Allen.

That's super fucked up. As in, Johnny should be in jail for a pedophile fucked up. It's a mid to late 20s dude dating a 15-17 year old girl. That's incredibly predatory and weird. Very strange that both the author wrote it and that no one has called it out.
Reishin Amara chapter 15 . 10/25/2022
Technically the HULK can have sex...Bruce banner can't. Int he Planet Hulk arc he actually becomes an almost dad. Right up til a group of bastards blow up the planet along with his wife and unborn child.
bige2613 chapter 98 . 10/21/2022
more
Kanaan Amro chapter 98 . 10/19/2022
are you going to add new chapters to this story, its a really good one
Redumdelta chapter 41 . 10/18/2022
Maya Hansen is white in the MCU, and in the comics. Js. Pulling from a lot of different sources is one thing, but that's a really big retcon to try to justify the existence of hentaiheart.
Guest chapter 36 . 10/17/2022
Las primera no le di cuenta y la segunda se me olvidó, pero la tercera es la vencida, y Valeria?
LizardTongue chapter 98 . 10/15/2022
Just found this and binge read it. I hope real life allows you to come back this.
Guest chapter 1 . 10/12/2022
Recuerdo haberlo leído en Wattpad y después de un tiempo desaparecido, (hace algunos años) y hoy la recordé, la busque aquí solo por las dudas y si está, a empezar de nuevo
JustinC100 chapter 1 . 10/11/2022
Abandoned
sovietgod03 chapter 14 . 10/7/2022
there are no more terrifying words than I was sent by the government and I am here to help.
dicksonrita75 chapter 98 . 10/3/2022
sh!t... the cliffhanger is an utter fučkĕry... why leave us hanging when it got really interesting... I literally binged this for two days just to find myself unsatisfied wishing for more
Lunar of Shadows chapter 98 . 10/2/2022
i love this story i pretty much binged it after i found it. Even though its been a while since it updated i will hold out hope that it returns. great work so far.
Swaggerboy chapter 98 . 9/22/2022
10/10
Ahfucjcb chapter 98 . 9/22/2022
Just realized how long it’s been since the last chapter, hope you’re doing well.

Thank you for all the time you spent sharing your work with us!
XIII The Wandering Paladin chapter 1 . 9/19/2022
This is a full review of what I’ve read of this fanfiction. Anything I say in this comes from a fan of the source material and personal preferences, since this is just a review I will try my best to be polite about this.

First things first, this needed a ton of grammar work. Like a lot. More than just slapping it together. There are words that aren’t even words, typos for words that shouldn’t even be typos, and other things like avoiding capitals in some sentences, especially dialogue. It’s kind of a mess, and if it does get better later on, then I’m impressed. If it stays at this quality all the way through, then maybe it’s time to go back through and take another look.

Second things second… oof. Okay. So taking into account that this is a Self Insert, there are some things one must account for. And well… let’s start with the elephant in the room.

The time placement just doesn’t work. You, the author, have come into Peter’s body in the middle of High School, when it’s established that Peter acts a certain way. You have essentially murdered Peter Benjamin Parker and hijacked his body, but NOBODY acts like you’re any different?

The reason why Superior Spider Man works is that everyone KNOWS something is up with Peter, and the changes made makes them wary of him or even have nothing to do with him. Especially with the May and Ben you based yours off of, they’d notice right away something was wrong about their Nephew.

The only thing you’ve kept of Peter’s is his smarts. Which also brings with it a heavy amount of research into what he does to make it sound convincing. See, with comics, I’m sure it’s a lot of comic logic, but I can hardly believe he can just make new web fluid without some really hefty equipment. (Like a Centrifuge.) And well, if you have ‘Well he’s a genius!’ As your excuse, with any amount of writing there has to be some level of research into AT LEAST the basic mechanics of the thing you’re working with.

Also, not to mention how you handled poor MJ. Now as you’d probably see in my own fic, MJ isn’t my main love interest. Not that I dislike her, but what you did with her in this? It’s inexcusable. So with this… SIPeter, he’s initially friendly to her and she’s friendly back, but the second she gets more friends than SIPeter?

“Waaaaahhhh! Wahhhh! She’s like all the others! Fucking WOMEN! WAAAAHHHH!”

Not only that but she tries to apologize, but you're so butthurt that you can't even hear her out.

Like, dude. Her world and life doesn’t revolve around you. And well, since Felicia is on the chopping block… god I know what you’re gonna use. You’re gonna use the Spider Thirst to it’s full effect to have all the smexy times you want. Which again, is fine if you actually have a coherent, well thought out story.

But you don’t. That’s the sin here. To cut this short, I will be reading this laughing at how freaking stupid it is. I don’t know how this even got popular. Also, here's the thing about Batman...

Batman had years and years of training to get where he is. Years of growing pains, too. Year One, The Long Halloween, The Batman? All of which show a younger, more inexperienced, and angry Bruce Wayne. The main draw to him you missed the mark on entirely. It's not his skills, it's his humanity.

Also the railway hangar? Seriously? It's not private anymore, move somewhere else. Also yeah, great job on trying to handle gangs and more serious topics with the maturity of a wet noodle. And then you drop in Kingpin, which is fine. But Daredevil just randomly putzes in, and is barely a character!

Don't even get me STARTED on the 'training' and 'Muscle Memory' that's not how either works, Kendo is a complicated discipline taking years to master and complex footwork to achieve. And you breeze right though it without a struggle. I get that this is a power trip but dear LORD pump the brakes.

Muscle memory is doing something you once did a long time ago, and your muscles remember the motions you do. It's not an instant download like you're making it out to be here. It's remembering what motions the body has done before with any long dead activity like playing catch or swimming or riding a bike.

I'm sorry for such a long review, I just felt that this needed to be said. I won't be dropping this story, but my frustrations with this thing have been bothering me. I hope you go on to do some killer stories, just this one though is... Something.

Sincerely,
XIII.
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