Reviews for How To Invade An Alien Planet
t3HPrO chapter 1 . 7/31/2017
Holy shit this made me laugh so hard my sides went into orbit. It reminds me of a couple of other ME fics where the most ridiculous shit would happen, and the narrator is just reading it like it bores him/her to death.

Well done.
Aramus13 chapter 1 . 7/30/2017
Really enjoyed reading this story, can't stop laughing. Well done!
Vladicus chapter 1 . 7/30/2017
First of all I love your profile... It's actually what made me add you at my favorites. And while I like this story so far I do however have some problems with it. A) You gave the Batarians too much of an Idiot ball when dealing with humanity...

Sure the tech advantages(except them never hearing of missiles, that's just absurd) is believable but their incompetence is not... No matter how powerful someone is in your military you don't give them one of your dreadnoughts to command when you can't have more than 6 due to a treaty you'll get shanked to death by 6 different species for breaking.

Even if they're nobility and inbred retardism is the norm with them , they should at least know how to control a spaceship and to stay on the biggest ship in orbit while the grunts go and die in a ditch or something.

Them not bombarding stuff from orbit... From what I understand that ban on bombarding only applies to dreadnought scale weaponry which means not using nuke equivalents on a planet, cruisers and frigates firing from orbit on strategic objectives is allowed and a single cruiser shot should destroy any sea-bound ship from orbit

The Council letting them get away with not being conquered for opening a new relay and eve allowing them to function as a rogue state almost broke my SOD that's so outside the Council's views is not even funny... They induct any race they can and use any means necessary to keep them in, heck it even worked to make a humanity that was xenophobic and bioticphobic(don't know how to call fear and hatred of biotics) after being invaded and managing to ward off said invasion and even kept us under unfavorable terms even if the Turians were in the wrong. What in the holy name of fuck made you think they wouldn't try to conquer the Hegemony if they broke so many galactic rules

What broke my SOD is that the Council didn't know where Sol was...The Council stated they knew how many relays were opened so this means that they either managed to find out how to do it from the Citadel or they had salarian STG ships follow them so this means that they could get back if they so wished.

Also you said that several ships went missing for decades and while most Batarian tech needed eezo to work reverse engineering should have been possible or at least reproducing the effects or heck even using captured ships should have made humanity able to project some force in space except trojan horses
Gyre chapter 1 . 7/30/2017
LOL through the whole story. Hope you continue this. Surely the Asari will send a diplomatic mission
to counter the cultural contamination.
BlackHeart KSK chapter 1 . 7/30/2017
I like it. Write more.
acherus01 chapter 1 . 7/30/2017
Only 1 chapter, and i'm already helplessly in love with your story.
Please continue!
Thaddius chapter 1 . 7/30/2017
MOAR!
UNSC-AI-ANT chapter 1 . 7/29/2017
I liked this story, hope there's more in the future
ragnar thorson chapter 1 . 7/29/2017
Will there be more
Ghostboy95 chapter 1 . 7/29/2017
I like this one. I really like this idea for a story. I think you should continue it along the lines of revealing what happened in the second and third invasions before continuing on to the third and final invasion just before the Humans attack back taking planets from the hegemony along with the Batarian resistance.
MercyGhost1998 chapter 1 . 7/29/2017
Oh my God, this was brilliant!
Those poor fools...
Thirty years later, humans will have managed to reverse engineer their tech and make it BETTER before showing up at their doorstep for some pay back. Nothing like a common enemy to get things done!
BlurScanner chapter 1 . 7/29/2017
Haha liked how you interpolate with those quotes as the batarians failed miserably. Setting was also reasonable and damn amusing, nice work man
yzayfreak chapter 1 . 7/29/2017
This isn't the end is it cause I as a nonpaying reader demands more
seabo76 chapter 1 . 7/29/2017
That was amusing!
lusians chapter 1 . 7/29/2017
lol good one had me in tears keep it up
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