|Reviews for Dance While You Can|
| readingchameleon chapter 18 . 2/1/2019
For those who aren't aware, AO3 stands for "Archive of own own". It can be found by entering this into your favourite search engine :-)
| DemonkittenXIII chapter 7 . 2/1/2019
Amazing story love it so far keep up the good work
| chibitamaora chapter 17 . 6/14/2018
aaaah this fic is so good! Why haven't I read this before? Keep up with it!
And I love the way you are developing Lea's character.
| wingedcatgirl chapter 17 . 5/4/2018
| Numinous Scribe chapter 17 . 4/7/2018
*slams fist on the table* CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT! Gosh, I just really love seeing these three grow. Lea's owning up to his mistakes, he's coming around to trusting his teammates more and show more of himself and his earnestness― ugh, I'm in love with the way you write him. And for once we get to see Riku being vulnerable to something other than the Darkness! Enter, the common cold~
Also, Clash of the Mom Friends (TM). Lmao, Raiku, you can't win this. Lea has more experience being the Mom Friend. But honestly though, the way Lea was arguing his case to get Riku to actually take care of himself― I'm sitting here reading the entire exchange when I thought of that one vine where the dude goes, "Ha ha.. I do that." because that's how I argue with my friends when they don't properly take care of themselves. XD
I really love how you emphasize Lea promising something that sounds rather trivial by crossing his heart. I just― It's such a significant thing, y'know? For someone who's already lost his heart, to be promising on such a thing just seriously emphasizes how much he values the promise he makes, and how unwilling he'd be to break it. I hope that crossing his heart when he makes promises becomes a bigger thing. Side note, have you ever looked up the full poem for the cross your heart rhyme? It's quite interesting and the more I think about it the more strongly I think it fits Lea.
Until the next update!
| crestoflight3 chapter 17 . 4/7/2018
Good chapters recently! Keep up the good work!
This was a nice change of pace from the last few chapters; no other characters, just Lea and Riku - and you handled their dynamic really well.
| Guest chapter 3 . 4/7/2018
This is awesome so far! "The impracticality of wearing a full length leather trenchcoat" lol
| Guest chapter 1 . 4/7/2018
I've wanted to see a story about keyblade training for a while, and this seems like it!
| Guest chapter 1 . 4/7/2018
This is great!
| Numinous Scribe chapter 16 . 4/6/2018
If I could put emojis on here even I don't know how many of the fine hand symbols there would be right now. I've said this before but I'm saying it again anyways— I'm just in love with how well you characterize everyone! Honestly, Lea's confliction with himself about what his responsibility and duty is is just so raw and poignant that it really feels like he's in front of me, SHOWING me how badly this tears him up. (AND AAAAAHHHH THE SUBTLE XION REFERENCE, SHOOT ME IN THE HEART WHY DON'T YA?!) Also, hello, yes, I am here for supportive Raiku and Carry! Oh who am I kidding — I'M A SLUT FOR WHOLESOME AND SUPPORTIVE RELATIONSHIPS AND YOU WRITE THIS ONE SO ARTFULLY ADVDSVHJKKGESVBJ
Okay, I'm cool now XD.
Anyways, I also like how you employ scenery to help set the mood. It's so nice and realistic that I was actually getting angstily chilled. It's also a great use of show not tell.
And yay for resolution! (Or is it? Mwahaha...)
I went and found this story on ao3, but I don't have an account so I hesitate to guest review on there (is that even possible?) So even though I'm reading all that's posted over there I'll still leave reviews when you update here! And I totally get where you're coming from in regards to missing stuff. I actually found out that when you read your work in a different formatting (like say, you do everything in Ariel size 11 on Google docs or something, then post it here and it turns into times new roman size 12) then it's easier to spot all the mistakes. Cause when you're staring at the same document the entire time you are none the wiser. I usually come back to an update the day after to go over and see if there's anything I might need to fix. And holy heck if problems with commas ain't a relatable mood! I only recently got some help with that, but man has it done wonders for my sentence flow. If you'd like I can send you the bit of advice that I received?
This was a good chapter and I'm so glad I could be of help! Until next update!
| Numinous Scribe chapter 15 . 4/5/2018
Ah! I've been waiting for this update, so excited!
I really love the way you don't overplay Merida's accent. I've seen one too many Hetalia fics where their accents were hella overdone and it's bothered me ever since. It's kinda something that's carried over into anything where characters have a distinctive accent, y'know? So with this it's just nice to see a gentle use of speech quirk that enables the reader to imagine the rest of the accent. Very nice. Very in character.
I also enjoyed the subtle prelude to the mentioned ship from Kairi's pov. It came about naturally in conversation and consequently planted an idea in her mind for her to review later. There's also bonus points to be found in her wanting to focus more on doing the best she can to make herself a prominent and dependable person of their team. It's a fiery side to Kairi that I hope to see more of.
On another note I have just a bit of constructive criticism(?):
There are spots where you have a few run on sentences, as well as a need to perhaps break some paragraphs up. There was also a sentence that doesn't start off capitalized. (I'm kind of lazy since I'm not logged in/reviewing on mobile, so sorry, but if you need more specifics then please feel free to PM me!)
All in all I'm really looking forward to seeing what happens next!
| Numinous Scribe chapter 14 . 2/11/2018
I can't really say that the shipping plans you have in mind are my cuppa tea, but that's mostly just because I don't give much thought into shipping aside from AquaxTerra. However, I think I can get behind this ship if things remain wholesome enough. (As a rare pair shipper I am a sucker for anything wholesome and fluffy. Best kind of ships honestly.) Besides, your writing is very good and I love your characterizations of the characters so I feel like abandoning at this point would be blasphemy. (That and I find it very difficult to find well written fics with Lea in them, so this is like, one of two other national treasures for me.)
On another note, it's so refreshing to see other worlds being used as opposed to the mainstream Disney worlds. I'm definitely keen to see where else our lovely trio will go.
Until the next update, adieu!
| Numinous Scribe chapter 4 . 2/6/2018
Have I mentioned how much I love sassy Lea? Because I really love sassy Lea.
Mmmm oh my gosh this was such a great chapter. I like how he and Kairi turned over a new leaf in the last chapter, and in this one shopping is what sealed the deal. They make a good verbal attack team honestly.
Riku was pretty frickin adorable, ok. What a good big (dope) brother. As a sucker for fluff and all the tired Mom Friend (TM) children i can assure you that you've hooked me good.
| Numinous Scribe chapter 2 . 2/6/2018
Sassy Lea is best Lea and I am forever grateful he exists XD
On another note Lea's desperation to show how earnest he is clashing with his mulish tendencies is also iconic. It's like mixing his kid self in with his adult version without anyone noticing, himself included. I really do enjoy your grasp on his personality in this story. It's a blessing, truly. (I could go on gushing about how much I love Lea but then where would the review go, lmao XD)
| Numinous Scribe chapter 1 . 2/6/2018
I love a good story with Lea in it, so I'm actually kind of excited to read this. His characterization feels just right for him and the fact that he's still trying to feel his way around having a heart again. I also like that he's having problems summoning his keyblade again, and that you acknowledge that these weapons reflect their weilders and as such have personalities to match. It's such an interesting concept honestly and I can see it working as a good plot point or something. Looking forward to reading more about this journey Lea's gonna have to take in order to find himself, and to an extent, his keyblade.