|Reviews for Struck By Lightning|
| a311243549 chapter 22 . 7/16/2018
Very good. Percy is probably going to start questioning/doubting himself a lot more, as well as his motivations. I really like this story, although I wish we could see Thalia again, as I originally came for the Perlia before staying for the plot. I thought of a cool Deus Ex Machina for Percy. We know that Poseidon is the Earthshaker, a power of Percy's that could someday manifest when things are at their grimmest could be to create a localized volcanic eruption (or course, he would be able to control the flow of the lava and prevent it from getting on him as it is liquid). For extra angst, the first time he uses this power, there could be a terrible cost (i.e. his allies getting caught in the blast or some such thing).
Thanks for your had work and fast updating!
| jonny114 chapter 21 . 7/9/2018
woo hoo another one! keep it up i love this story and look forward to updates
| rebfan90 chapter 21 . 7/3/2018
| Death Fury chapter 21 . 7/2/2018
| LeviathanFicWhen chapter 21 . 7/2/2018
The plot thickens...
I'm liking the story thus far.
This chapter raised some questions however. Is everyone in 'Ancient Greece' assumed to be mortal? Does the mist still apply, or can everyone else see monsters? I am assuming that Percy is attempting to purchase steel weapons; does that imply that monsters, demigods, & celestial bronze are relatively unknown in this timeline, despite the fact that he is seemingly recognized as a demigod my a fair amount of people.
| Chomper32 chapter 21 . 7/2/2018
Great job once again! Can’t wait for the next part, weekly update plans are great, even if you miss a week or two here and there. Keep writing! :)
| te amour chapter 1 . 7/2/2018
For romance stories, I personally dislike keeping the love interest out of the picture for what’s been a decent amount of time and looks to be even more. Of course, this story looks to be more focused on adventure, but considering the title of it is “Struck by Lightning”, I feel as if you’re straying from the point a little.
Your writing style is very careful and meticulous. I suggest adding a little more liveliness on top of thatsome humor, some sass, some excitement. Appealing to the readers’ emotions can make a story very nice to read. The easiest way to do that is through romance and monologues and whatnot, but it doesn’t look like you’re going to have much room for that in the near future. So I would suggest focusing a little more on Percy’s inner feelings, his desire to get back to present time, Thalia, etc. . It could show through his actions, thoughts, dialogues...essentially in many ways.
All in all, I just feel that the story’s been a little too much about telling the plot in the past few chapters. However, it’s still been a great read.
| FutureCSdropout chapter 20 . 6/7/2018
You’re vocabulary & sentence structure gets repetitive at times, but I’m liking it story wise. Can’t wait to see how this will tie back in to the main plot line.
| Chomper32 chapter 20 . 6/4/2018
Great job! Can’t want for another. I’ll see If I can think of summary. Hopefully it’ll be ok! :)
| XWFY chapter 20 . 6/4/2018
I'm not good at reviewing, but I can't favourite this story again and I'm already following, so while I love this fanfic, I can't really show much more support for it. Sorry. Still, I love this story and am wondering if it will continue through to HOO. If so, I would love that. Anyway, ideas. What if Poseidon and the rest of the Olympians discover Percy and his incredible power, and they chain him up and question him, and then Chronos just walks in, wipes their memory (with a potion or something, I doubt Mnemosyne would help) and waltzes him out of there. Then, after the war, he tells the gods of what happened but they don't believe him until he uses a particularly nasty insult that he used before Chronos wiped their memory and it brings their memories back. Another idea, though I don't know if Lupa is exists yet, he meets Lupa, and when HOO happens, she keeps thinking that she's met him some time before, and then he regains his memory and it all becomes clear, or maybe he meets the Minotaur (again (eye roll)), or some other creature/ monster like Ella.
Anyways, I love this story, good luck!
P.S Have you already decided on a basic outline of what's going to happen, especially with this time-travel quest, or are you making it up as you go?
| Death Fury chapter 20 . 6/4/2018
| dioVv chapter 19 . 5/31/2018
Dude, Perseus is a dick
| Guest chapter 19 . 5/31/2018
| Mr.Stoll chapter 19 . 5/29/2018
really great story so far,and great writing as always.I really cant see where your going with this concept,but wherever it is im sure it will be interesting if you are the one to write it.
| Death Fury chapter 19 . 5/28/2018