Reviews for unloved
empyreale chapter 1 . 5/3
okay, so i adore haikus. well, i adore poetry in general, but haikus are some of my favorites. so clicking on this fic was an easy decision. i am really glad i did! your haikus are all so beautiful! the syllables work perfectly, as does the word choice, but what i love most of all is how you weave them all together into one larger poem! i love how powerful this is - we really get so much insight into bellatrix's character and that's amazing. you have so much emotion in this, and though you use simple words it all works together so nicely. i love the accentuation of the word always as well, it does wonders for your tone and style. if i had any critiques, it would be that this is a tad repetitive - i would give each of the haikus a defining point that helps them stand out from the others.
overall, though, this was a lovely poem
~sienna
NeonDomino chapter 1 . 12/31/2017
You had me feeling so sorry for Bellatrix here. It's like she knows his limits - that he might even care about her enough to do the things in the second to last part, but it would never be love.
I'm not an expert on poetry but I really enjoyed this and it's well written.
SecretFruits chapter 1 . 12/30/2017
Wow! This is great! I haven't read very many poetry pieces, but I'm really glad I clicked on this. This is beautifully composed, and also a great character analysis of the two of them. Great job.
rhead-a-holyc chapter 1 . 12/26/2017
I really liked the implication of the first line "she wants to". I don't know if you intended it this way, but I feel like Bellatrix can't admit to loving Voldemort because he hasn't given her permission to do so - which ties in nicely with the fifth stanza, where Bellatrix knows her feelings are being ignored.

The haiku-style of this poem had each stanza feeling like a series of fleeting thoughts Bellatrix has every so often, which was brilliant, really, because she doesn't really have the "permission" to have those thoughts.

Great job!
CelestialRosegold chapter 1 . 12/25/2017
A haiku is such a beautiful way to express this unrequited love story! I love (or is it hate? I'm not sure) the hints of the fact that Voldemort is doing it on purpose even though he knows it hurts her.

"She will *always* kill for him": That's the line that got me.

Thanks for breaking my poor heart...
Zivandre chapter 1 . 12/23/2017
I really, really like this. I always love how Bellatrix pines after Voldemort, but he never indulges her. [Ignoring CC, that monstrocity is nothing but crappy published fanfiction.] I like the style of this, and is it bad I knew who this was about before looking at the character tags? XD But, I love this! Great job! :D
obscurialdefenseclub chapter 1 . 12/22/2017
I usually never come across fics set up like this, but I really loved the poem and it flowed. I loved the haiku format, well done;) It really showed the dynamic between Voldemort and Bellatrix perfectly and characterized them well. This was an enjoyable read. Well done!:3
-Ana
hillstar chapter 1 . 12/22/2017
Awwww. This poem does a good job showing the pathos of the one-sided Bellamort relationship. She would do ANYTHING for him to love her, but he will never return that love (and perhaps is incapable of loving anyone.) I really like how you used the haiku format. It got right to the heart of the matter in each stanza.
9025709621590 chapter 1 . 12/14/2017
I love this. The one-sided Bella/Voldemort is always great to read, but to see it in haiku form like this is something I haven't seen before and the brevity of it helps bring those unrequited feelings across!
Holly The Sparkling Unicorn chapter 1 . 12/14/2017
This is awesome, I love poetry but I can't write it for the love of anything, especially haiku. The story of Bella and Voldy is a tragic one, her uttermost affection and his inability to love. I think though, deep down, he probably did feel something for her. Even if he couldn't express it.
RainyDayReading chapter 1 . 12/7/2017
Wow. This poetry was truly beautiful.
I've always thought of Bellatrix as feeling this way, and you wrote her desperate need to please the one she loves perfectly. And Voldemort appreciates her, his most loyal follower, but he will never, ever love her... poor Bellatrix...
Very well done!
AlwaysPadfoot chapter 1 . 12/7/2017
All in all I thought this depicted the relationship between Belletrix and Voldemort perfectly. That being said, I expect Senryu to be far more metaphorical and poetic than theses came across. I think you could have taken a far more abstract outlook on this. Your characterisation was really good and depicted Bella's feelings well. x
The Crownless Queen chapter 1 . 12/7/2017
Oh my god, I haven't read HP poetry in ages! Nice work on this - I've always thought that Bellatrix was the perfect subject for a poem and this definitely proved me right. You really did a nice job on those hiakus, they really worked well :p
Cheers! ;)
Jily Trash chapter 1 . 12/5/2017
This was a very creative idea, I liked it! You characterized Bellatrix and Voldemort very well (although there was no dialogue) and you captured their feelings and actions perfectly! This was an enjoyable read.
ipsa dixit chapter 1 . 12/1/2017
oh wow. i love that in such a short amount of words you've managed to convey the message of their broken love so well and while keeping the syllables (i counted)

even though i don't really ship the pair, i really liked this series of haikus, nice job :D
18 | Page 1 2 Next »