|Reviews for Can I Come In?|
| NeonDomino chapter 1 . 6/5
I love your characterisation of Alice here. That's what stood out the most. I have a lot of love for Alice.
Petunia was great here too, determined to avoid Alice at any costs, scared to leave the house in case Alice ambushed her. I think Alice took a lot of joy in messing with Petunia too and it was nice that Lily asked someone to go and watch over her sister like that.
And Death Eater traps had me laughing. Trust Petunia to get caught in one!
Excellent writing - I like how you wrote this ship!
| Zivandre chapter 1 . 1/29
this was original. I never see petunia with anyone other then Vernon, so that was a nice change. I was a bit shocked at it being Alice, but in the end, it worked out. I also like how you built up Petunia giving in and letting Alice come inside. It stayed true to her character that she would refuse until the Death Eater attacked. This was a very cute fic, Great job!
| The Crownless Queen chapter 1 . 1/28
Well I think it's safe to say that this pairing can be added to the ever growing list of pairings I never thought I would like to read about (cwl)
But honestly this fic was lovely. You really nailed Petunia's character and her reluctance to accept Alice being there at first and then slowly growing used to her presence and then missing her when she's gone was very well done :)
I liked how mischievous Alice was too, and though I'm a bit curious as to what happened to Vernon and Frank in this verse I liked this story too much to really care :)
| DobbyRocksSocks chapter 1 . 1/28
Not a pairing I ever would have thought of, but you made it work pretty well, so I have to give you all the props for that. I loved your characterisation - of Petunia in particular, and I really liked the way you had it come on slowly instead of just being like, this happened. The end. You explained it all really well. I really enjoyed reading this, and it surprised me - in a good way. Well done.
| SecretFruits chapter 1 . 1/14
I really enjoyed this. This is not exactly a pairing I would have thought of, but you made it work. I like how you keep Petunia completely in character - kind of unpleasant, but not yet hardened into the cruel women she is when older. I like the idea that, with Alice, her life might be different.
I also like how you didn't rush this. It takes time, a free pie, and a Death Eater attack for Petunia to finally open her door. And that is Petunia!
| MissingMommy chapter 1 . 1/13
So I was a little apprehensive about AlicePetunia. But you made it work here. It was the slow deconstruction of Petunia's walls. I liked that idea that, even if she didn't talk to Petunia, Lily was still worried for her safety and had Alice look over her.
There were a few grammar issues throughout. J think the one that stuck out the most was [She hadn't magically appeared in the yard, she hadn't caught Petunia in one of her magical traps, she hadn't brought any more pie...] There are two ways to correct this - either changing your commas to semi-colons or deleting "she hadn't" following the two commas. And the ellipsis feels very unnecessary. I would honestly leave it at one full stop/period.
But overall, great job.
| jennybenny2845 chapter 1 . 1/7
What a wonderful read! I've never read this pairing before, and didn't think it would work. But, you made it happen and you wrote it so well! You nailed Petunia's personality perfectly - her hatred toward all things magic, especially. The scene with Petunia upside down cracked me up. The pie scene was my favorite! I'm glad that Petunia learned to care and that Alice found her way back to Petunia at the end. Nice job!
| AlwaysPadfoot chapter 1 . 1/4
I love this pairing suddenly. I meant Have never read or written it before but, suddenly, now I want to do just that. I thought that this was a fantastic AU and that Alice is written perfectly, cheeky and her perfect Auror-self.
I enjoyed the snippets you chose and I felt as though they really showed how their relationship grew as time goes on. This was a nice mix of emotions and humorous moments which felt nicely realistic too.
Loved this, excellent job! x
| yellow 14 chapter 1 . 12/8/2017
I'm not going to lie, the pairing really shouldn't work. Ever. No way. Not without major Ooc behaviour from Petunia. At least, that was what I thought. Then you managed the impossible and made it work. And Merlin did you make it work. The characters are in character, the reactions real and the writing amazing. I am in awe...not only do you manage the impossible, you do it with style. Keep writing