|Reviews for Full Moon Fever|
| Nancymer172 chapter 3 . 4/23/2018
| Sky Woods chapter 3 . 3/28/2018
The ending is awesome
| broadwaylover18 chapter 3 . 1/6/2018
could you make a smut with rikki and zane if its not too much for you?
| Boxoffandoms chapter 3 . 1/2/2018
sooooo good deffo do a part 2
| XxxXxxXxx chapter 2 . 12/22/2017
Do I sense some Zikki coming up? This story is really great, can't wait to read the next part, please update soon!
| GracieGirl chapter 2 . 12/22/2017
this story is sooooo good! plz plz update ASAP
| Amber chapter 2 . 12/22/2017
This sorry is so good please update more :D
| Ann chapter 1 . 12/20/2017
Please continue! I think I like where this is going. :)
| brenncns chapter 1 . 12/20/2017
LMAO POOR WILL. I lost it at "To top it all off, Rikki had added dramatic false eyelashes." Like, honestly. How iconic.
So, onto your writing. You've got an excellent start here! I think you should definitely continue this. However, there are a couple things I noticed that you should watch out for:
Remember to Show, Not Tell. It's a little bit of a cliche,' yes, but true nevertheless.
Rikki and Cleo sat in beach chairs opposite the pair on the deck, trying not to feel bitter [...]
Rikki and Cleo were lounging in two of the brightly colored beach chairs Will had sitting on his deck, trying not to feel bitter [...]
"Nothing." Rikki shrugged, scrolling mindlessly through Facebook on her phone.
"Nothing." Rikki said with an absentminded shrug of her shoulders. She continued to scroll through the Facebook app on her phone.
Another thing to keep in mind is the word "said." It's a great word! And, contrary to popular belief, it isn't overused. Words like "gasped," "explained," "retorted," etc. can take readers out of the story if they're used too often. So, be sure to use those words sparingly—and only when you need to make an impression. "Bella and Cleo murmured" is a good example of that, because murmuring is different than speaking—the beginning of your sentence lets your readers know that Bella and Cleo are talking quietly. Now, "Will suggested as a compromise" would read much smoother if it were re-written as "Will said, suggesting a compromise." A nice lil' rule of thumb: if you can replace the word you're using in place of "said" with "said" and the tone doesn't change, go with "said." (Did that make sense? Lol)
Alright, I'll stop rambling now. I hope this was helpful! And I hope it didn't come off mean or condescending or anything. . . I'm just passing on a few helpful tips that I've been given and/or have picked up here and there. Haha. But keep writing, please! I'm interested to see where this goes.
Oh, and on a semi-unrelated note; I love your current username! I checked out your profile, and I'm into AHS and The Hunger Games, too! If you ever wanna chat, my PMs are always open. :)
| Makodragon chapter 1 . 12/19/2017
I laughed so hard at the makeover part