|Reviews for Legends|
| archivewriter3 chapter 1 . 5/20
This brought a smile to my face and nostalgia my mind. Years of me fighting alongside my Charizard Sol, in whichever medium. Gameboy Color? Sol. Gameboy Advance? Sol. meboy emulator? Sol. That Charizard was my everything on the games.
This story speaks truth in one word... Legends
| Farla chapter 1 . 2/8
Alrighty, the last fic of January, now getting its shamefully belated review.
[ But soon all the little streams and rivulets, icy glacier-melt tumbling down from above, were crowded with people jostling for a view of the old dragon.]
I like this detail. It's a nice hint that the place is largely populated by water pokemon.
[ Blastoise never stopped growing, and while once Charizard had been taller than this one, now it was Blastoise who towered, her hands alone so broad she could probably crush Charizard's skull one-handed. Her shell and hide were crusted with sand, pebbles, twigs, mud from the wallow she'd been lying in.]
But really, I like all the detail. The physicality of it, and how elemental the two of them have become, how they reshape the landscape around them.
It's very nice to see pokemon existing prior to their trainers, as well. The whole thing's pleasantly inverted, even, with the trainer's characterization being an offshoot of the pokemon's.
[The boy was kneeling in front of a bulbasaur, stroking his glossy bud, but Charmander stormed over and set the grass-type fleeing, tears in his eyes, with just a single swipe of claws.
The human watched his potential partner run off, arms draped over his knees. "That was mean," he said, not angry but flat, just an observation. Charmander stood and fumed in front of him, growling, tail blazing.
"You can't go with any of the other people," the human mused. "You'd eat them alive, wouldn't you?" Charmander hissed, and the boy smiled back. "Want to come with me?"]
Both are delightful.
I would like to know more about what happened with their trainers. [They gave their lives to find the answer] sounds so specific, too specific if it's just an accident that happened that's only important for what it meant to the two pokemon, yet the only thing concrete is that Blue choked while they were doing something important and deadly, or at least Charizard feels he did, and it was a quick enough and deadly enough deadly thing that was all it took to get both trainers killed. My first thought was they simply fought a legendary, but it doesn't fit that well with both pokemon still being in fine condition or the way they talk about Reshiram maybe being real or the general sense that they were engaged in something important enough for Charizard to be offended Blastoise wants to give up. It seems like it was something legendary-adjacent, though, and it's hard to figure out what would kill two people without actually managing a fight. Collateral damage? Dangerous terrain on the way?
| St Elmo's Fire chapter 1 . 2/3
This was beautiful. The battle was magnificently raw and detailed and both of them had so much personality. I love your description like [Charizard didn't decline as they aged. They grew stronger and stronger, the fire inside them burning ever hotter until it overcame them from within, like a dying star.] and the flashbacks and the cute squirtle kids. I'm a bit unclear on what Red and Blue tried to do - is it a reference to some anime thing, or did they just go chasing after some unspecified godmonster they shouldn't have? (I'd presume Ho-oh, since that's the obvious route for raising the dead - although, why Reshiram and not Xerneas for the second choice?)
But just, ahh, this was good beyond words. You convey their age and power and emotions so well.
[with none to protect them them but themselves]
[The watchers shrieked and jumped in terrified delight as the solar beam touches down] - tense trouble
[nor the ones making doe-eyes at some Bulbasaur or Squirtle] - poke caps
[but no surprise that their path crossed] - Should it be "paths"?
| nihile chapter 1 . 2/1
Oh I love this!
[The pool's frozen surface breaks her fall, but only for a second. Then the main mass of the glacier comes roaring down, ice splintering against ice and spraying razor shards in all directions. The ice beneath Charizard gives way, dumping her into freezing water.]
This is the only paragraph that's in present tense, while the rest is in past.
[Turning your back on them now? Pathetic?]
I think this might work better if pathetic didn't have a question mark after it, since it sounds like Charizard is unsure rather than taunting.
[She slipped free, hot water carrying her up like an elevator until her head broke the surface, sweet oxygen all around.]
I love this detail! Overheat didn't just burn blastoise off but also made a thermal current.
I love the solid bits like how blastoise grow slower and bigger forever and charizard burn themselves out, and how they argued over pyres/sea burial. Jokes on them, they should've sent them to Valhalla with a proper viking funeral. Is the trainers' final adventure Cerulean Cave? I know this is a oneshot but I'd love to see any sequels you might think up!
| Jeff Excellence chapter 1 . 2/1
This is absolutely excellent! You built the characters of Blastoise and Charizard excellently with great use of flashbacks, superb description and well-described attacks to make an excellent fight between the two.
I also love how the relationship between the two characters is explored, and how their relationships with their trainers were explored, too. Overall, very good job! I thoroughly enjoyed!
| Keleri chapter 1 . 1/31
OH SHIIIIIIIIIT this is the best, I love this so much. Who cares about boring old Red and Blue anyway!?
I love the description of the old pokemon and attacks and the flashbacks. The worldbuilding is great, with hints of what battling really means to pokemon, the role of trainers, and their lives after they outlive them. Mega evolution going wrong sounded amazingly horrifying. If you want to write a fic about Charizard and Blastoise griping about Millennial Pokemon and their Vacadoo Berry Toast I am hella here for it.
"Charizard lashed her fiery ail" - tail