I must say that while this story has a good plot, it is poorly written...

My advice would be to find someone who knew the English language well and have them correct all mistakes in this story.

Just some constructive criticism... _

HEY! YOU SHOULD CONTINUE THIS! This is a good story, and it would be a waste to stop it here.

Really good story, please update soon!

Is there gonna be a 3rd chapter to this? If there is... CAN U MAKE IT ASAP? This fic is nice ya know?

You were a bit too harsh when it comes to Akane, but then again this is your story.

Conflicting when it comes to Akane's point of view. At first she was so cold, then she gets all guilty and stuff in the end? Be spontaneous about the character.

Again, you were a bit too harsh on Akane's account.

*shrug*

NO! CLIFHANGER!

Please update soon i can't wait to read what happens next YOU HAVE TO CONTINUE Don't let us like this with this clifhanger

PLEASE::big puppy eyes::

Looks like a good story, update!

Cliff hangers no! update soon! its a great story! keep up the good work!

sailor pluto rok

In addition to the fact that you've used an utterly

hackneyed plot, you've failed to create any sense of

emotional connection to your characters.

If you really want to continue this story, try to

put a little more effort into the character's

internal dialogue's. And for Christ's sake, get a

fucking pre-reader. Some of these sentences are

absolutely painful to parse.

This story was heavily rushed. some of the grammar in this fic is bothersome and is grating on my nerves. For example "O" is supposed to be "Oh" (This reminds me of fic I read where everytime "one" was supposed to be written "1" was put in it's place)

Ranma's last name is spelt Saotome, It's SAOTOME!

Sorry If I seemed to be lashing out at you, but this story is way too rushed for my preferences. While Ranma and Akane are my favorite pairing, This story seems lacking

Some characters are OOC, Ranma would not try to convey his feelings infront of Soun or his Father in fear of a rushed wedding. Perhaps when he and Akane are actually alone he would be serious about it.

Oh well, for your first atempt at a fanfiction, it's not too bad. Write more stories and you will get better with time. Good Luck.

its good so far. i'm woundering what your going to have ranma do mext since he said he chould be with no otehr woman. does that mean he'll lock his curse?

Forced scenes and a bit ooc with no explanation as to why they would act that way. I give it a 6.

First of all do you know that you dont accept anonimous review?

Well. Other thing. Dont put end at the last of each chapter. We know that the chapter is finish, but if you put it we could think that the story is finish.

I dont know where the story goes but i will like read more about it.

Continue please.

Kinai.