|Reviews for Over a Barrel|
| Blue Bonnet chapter 2 . 7/17
It’s coat, not ‘skin.’ When I say ‘coat’, I do not mean the clothing. It’s more of the fur covering their body, like Twilight has light purple fur and a long, dark mane (you can still use hair though).
Good retelling of the episode, but I do wish Sunrise has a little more involvement in here.
| RolePlayer48 chapter 1 . 7/16
*sigh*...I got nothing. I have absolutely nothing. I mean, what am I supposed to say? I have not had a good day at all. You see, today here in the UK, I was treated with really really awful weather! And as i did explain to you once before in one of my reviews on Missing in Zootopia, I'm very frightened of bad weather...especially the dark coloured clouds that appear beforehand...and I got myself into such a huge stressy panic. And yeah, the awful weather was happening at pretty much the same time I posted those reviews earlier about you posting too much at once getting me too stressed to choose what to click on, read and review...so yeah...the weather's past but I'm still traumatised by it. Again, I have no idea why stormy weather/dark clouds are NOT scary in cartoons and they're okay with it when in reality it's not okay, but I can't put up with this weird logic. Anyway, last night, I was TRYING to come up with a good idea for a deleted scene for Over a Barrel which I left unfinished because by that point, I was out of ideas so I'll try to recreate this as best as I can.
Sunrise Blossom: Well, if you need any help or if you run out of ideas again, can we help out at all?
Me: Yeah sure. Well, here we go. For old time's sake.
(Over a Barrel: Deleted Scene 1: You know what, I can't even come up with a title for this one either due to my bad day. Everyone else think of one for me. But enjoy anyway!)
*So this deleted scene for Over a Barrel focuses on everypony getting ready for the train trip to Appleloosa, picking a good enough train, etc etc etc...in the middle of the night...WHAT? Don't look at me like that? It's nighttime after the scene where Applejack reads Bloomburg a bedtime story even thought THAT scene shows it's still daylight but that must be a few animation errors...why do I constantly interrupt my own deleted scenes with my rambling? Anyway, like I said, it's the middle of the night in Equestria. And at the Apothecary or wherever she lives, Sunrise Blossom is fast asleep in bed dreaming of Sunshine and Lollipops and Rainbows, everything that's wonderful is what she feels when she's why am I singing Lesely Gore's Sunshine and Lollipops song all of a sudden? Anyway, you get the point! That's what Sunrise is dreaming about right now. Suddenly, there is a loud knocking at her front door!*
Sunrise Blossom: (snort) Huh? Wha-? Who touched my DVD collection? Huh? (Hears the knocking again) What the? Now who on earth can by knocking at my front door at THIS time of the night? Especially when I was having a wonderful dream that I think Pinkie often has about Sunshine and Lollipops and Rainbows, everything that's wonderful is how i...(another loud knock at the door stops her from singing that song any further) alright! Alright! (Heads down the stairs very wearily and sleepily until she opens the front door to reveal...) Fluttershy? What the? What in the wide world of Equestria or any other place for that matter are you doing here so late at night? Don't you know what time it is? I was having a wonderful dream about Sunshine and Lollipops and Rainbows, every...
Fluttershy: Oh goodness. (Blushes) Umm, so sorry for waking you up so early...and interrupting your singing...
Sunrise Blossom: Wait, I was SINGING?!
Fluttershy: It's just that...well...Applejack told us all to wake up because we're going on a train trip to Appleloosa...
Sunrise Blossom: What? At THIS time of night? ARE YOU SERIOUS?
Fluttershy: Come on Sunny. I suppose I should better explain things to you on our way to the train station.
Spongebob French Narrator Guy: One extremely long weary sleepy walk to the train station and brief explanation from Fluttershy later...
Fluttershy: So you see, as a gift for her cousin, Applejack is going to be taking one of her favorite apple trees whom she named Bloomburg.
Sunrise Blossom: Okay, one) why a tree of all things? Why would a tree make a good gift? And two) Bloomburg? What kind of name is that?! Who names a tree Bloomburg?!
Fluttershy: I don't know. Why did your sister decide to name her doll from her childhood ''Smarty Pants''?
Sunrise Blossom: Touché. Wait, how do you know about Twilight's doll...
Fluttershy: Oh hey look! Here we are!
(Yep. Here they are indeed. The train station...What? They live literally not THAT far from the train station! Of course they'd all be there in a quick matter of time! I didn't build Ponyville and where everything goes! Stop looking at me! Anyway, Applejack and everyone else is waiting for the train to arrive.)
Applejack: Howdy, you two! Mighty early, huh?
Sunrise Blossom: Hey. I'm not used to being up so late at night.
Pinkie Pie: Are you sure? We've been up all night a few times before in the past, right?
(Note from RolePlayer48: she is referring to the episodes in the past involving everypony being up so late at night like Return of Nightmare Moon or Boast Busters or whatever...)
Pinkie Pie: Uh hello? Are you gonna answer me or have you all forgotten?
Rainbow Dash: Hey uh, speaking of forgetting things, WHERE IS THAT TRAIN?!
Twilight Sparkle: I don't know. Let's ask this guy.
Pinkie Pie: You mean the pony with the mustache?
Rarity: Pinkie, I believe you'll find that the correct word is conductor.
(Another note from RolePlayer48: Nope. Rarity is wrong. Here in the UK where I live, conductors are called guards. What? It's true! Stop giving me disapproving looks and glares!)
Twilight Sparkle: Excuse me Mr. Conductor. But where's the train?
Applejack: Yeah! I got a gift to give to everypony in Appleloosa to deliver here!
Rarity: (through gritted teeth) That she treats like a child!
Moustached Pony Conductor Whatever: Well, if you must know so badly, the train for Appleloosa had tipped over when it was being pulled out of the yards and needs fixing...which of course takes a long time.
(All ponies just groan in frustration)
Moustached Pony Conductor Whatever: And the stallions who pull these trains have gone on strike declaring that pulling trains like how ponies pull carts is a stupid idea and just plain abuse and labor to them when they can just DRIVE trains like human train drivers can like on cartoons I'm sure many of you are all familair with.
(The Mane Seven groan even MORE frustrated than before)
Moustached Pony Conductor Whatever: And that is pretty much the only train in Equestria we ever use to get to places far away and there aren't any more in the world available...okay, well there are but they're too busy on they're own railways to help US in our time of need.
Rainbow Dash: Surprise. Surprise. AJ, I told you this whole trip was gonna be a huge pointless disaster! (Tries to do an impression of Sir Hiss from a certain Disney movie) But no, no, no, you didn't listen.
Rarity: (sarcastically) Oh well. What a shame. Come on girls. Back to beddie bye!
Moustached Pony Conductor Whatever: HOWEVER...
Rarity: OH COME ON! I NEED MY BEAUTY SLEEP SO BADLY!
Sunrise Blossom: (nearly on the verge of falling alseep herself) So do I. I don't know how much longer I can stay awake.
Moustached Pony Conductor Whatever: A human friend of mine at a railway called Sodor...
(Yet another note from RolePlayer48: Hey! Thomas the Tank Engine and his friends were all probably gonna be a part of this series replacing all of the Equestria trains anyway due to that show also being a part of my childhood! Again, if Dede42's not a fan of that show or never grew up with it, don't hate me for it!)
Moustached Pony Conductor Whatever: ...agreed to lend his engine he calls ''Gordon'' to help out for the job.
Rainbow Dash: (bursts out laughing) Gordon?! Who names a train Gordon?!
Rarity: (cracking up from laughter herself) I know, Rainbow! Why don't you ask the pony who named a TREE Bloomburg?!
Applejack: (sarcastically) Oh hardy har har. Very funny.
Sunrise Blossom: Well gee, I can't think of any trains who would be called Gordon...unless of course you mean...
Pinkie Pie: Ooh! Ooh! That big blue tender engine Gordon who loves to pull the express and hates pulling trucks/freight cars (trucks were renamed freight cars in the US Thomas narration for some weird reason) from that cartoon show about talking trains that Sunrise and Twilight's watched on they're DVDs from they're childhood?
Sunrise Blossom: Wait? You mean YOU'VE watched Thomas the Tank Engine too?
Pinkie Pie: Yep.
Rainbow Dash: Okay seriously. How many more cartoon characters from our DVDs we all have at home are gonna eventually turn out to be real and exist in this world? I mean, first there was that weird lion prince from a Disney adapted Robin Hood film and then there's that meerkat and warthog from some film about lions that's SO boring that Sunrise has met that one time after getting hopelessly lost in the Everfree Forest! How much more are there?
Sunrise Blossom: It's a question that's gonna have to remain unanswered for now, Rainbow. Anyway, how on earth did your friend/Gordon's driver manage to convince Gordon to pull a train filled with us talking horses that he may find weird? You know how he'll only care about pulling the express rather than any other job, right?
Moustached Pony Conductor Whatever: Well you see...
Spongebob French Narrator Guy: Flashback...
Narrator (Thomas and Friends Narrator): Okay so, it was yet another beautiful day on the Island of talking trains on a railway or somewhat. Thomas was out on his branch line pulling his two faithful coaches Annie and Clarabel, Percy was pulling the mail, James was at home in the shed NOT working boasting about his bright red coat of paint just to annoy everyone...
James: Hey Narrator! I can hear you ya know!
Narrator (Thomas and Friends Narrator): And Gordon was in the yards bragging about when he used to go to London.
Gordon: When I was young and green...
Duck: Oh not this again!
Gordon: I remember going off to London! Do you know the place? The station's called Kings Cross...
Duck: Gordon! Just shut up! I am NOT about to have the same conversation with you like last time when that weird train with no face came to visit! London is Paddington! Also, didn't you already TRY to go London to prove it was still King's Cross after we had this conversation last time?
Gordon: Well yes I did but it wasn't Kings Cross anymore. They changed it to St. Pancreas.
Duck: So why are you bragging about London again?
Gordon: My driver has a film about London called ''Basil The Great Mouse Detective''.
Duck: Why did have to ask?
Gordon: He wouldn't stop saying how good that film was and that everything took place in London and it made me want to start bragging again about Kings Cross again. Kinda makes me wish The Fat Controller...
Duck: Sir Topham Hatt to you!
Gordon: ...had installed TVs or DVD players in our sheds so that we don't miss out on what good stuff they've been watching!
Duck: Well how would we put the discs in the DVD player? WE DON'T HAVE HANDS! WE'RE TRAINS!
Gordon's Driver: Hey Gordon! Guess what?
Gordon's Driver: The Fat Controller has asked to take a special train to London again!
Gordon: No thanks! If it's not Kings Cross anymore then I'm not interested...
Gordon's Driver: Ah but they've changed it back to Kings Cross now and that's what the special train is for! To celebrate giving the station name King's Cross again!
Gordon: Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go! Hop in then Driver! (The driver jumps in the cab)
Gordon's Fireman: Well, did Gordon fall for it? We're not really going to London after all.
Gordon's Driver: Yes. It was the only thing I could come up with to get Gordon to pull something that ISN'T the express so that we can get him to help the ponies in Equestria who don't have a working train at the moment.
Gordon's Fireman: Why Gordon of all engines though? Why not anyone else who's always been annoying...like, oh i don't know, maybe JAMES?!
Gordon's Driver: Oh. Guess I didn't think that through.
Spongebob French Narrator Guy: End of flashback.
Moustached Pony Conductor Whatever: And before you ask, yes, Gordon's Driver has told the signalman to change the points to a differnet track which takes them to Equestria instead of London. He should be arriving any minute...(hears Gordon's whistle) oh! There he is now!
Gordon: (pulls into the station with his coaches) Phew! This has turned out to be a long trip! It's already nighttime! But at least i made it to London and King's Cross...(notices his surroundings) wait a minute! This isn't London! (Notices the ponies standing on the platform)
Pinkie Pie: Hiya Gordon!
Gordon: Oh the indignity! I've been tricked by my own driver to pull a train filled with those annoying talking multicoloured horses from that girl show that's been around since the 1980s! Oh the shame of it! The shame of it!
Applejack: Well it's about time. Come on, ya'll.
*Everyone boards the train trying to find a car with seven beds to sleep in while Applejack loads up Bloomburg in some luxurious parts of the train...which is a private car that has now just been attached to the back of the express coaches by some train driving pony.*
Gordon: Wait what? I have to have one of those weird triangle shaped break van things that Casey Jr has on the back of HIS circus train? Okay, this is just insult to injury here! I'm an express engine!
Gordon's Driver: Ah shut up and get going! Everyone's already onboard and the guard has already waved his green flag and blown his whistle.
Gordon: Oh alright fine! I suppose I'm just gonna have to do as I'm told whether I want to or not! Better start heading off to wherever these dumb idiots need going! Oh, I do hope everyone else back on Sodor doesn't find out about this! They'll never let me hear the end of it! (Heads off)
(End of deleted scene. Out of ideas here.)
Me: Well Sunrise, what do you think?
Sunrise Blossom: This is just SO funny! I like the idea of all Equestria trains replaced with Thomas characters!
Me: Hey! That's what ACTUALLY happened according to the tapes Timon and Pumbaa have. Dede42 probably just doesn't want to show what really happened in these stories just to be more original and to keep everyone that isn't me happy. Anyway Dede42, I hope you'll love this! I apologise if you weren't a Thomas fan growing up unlike me and others on the internet but I hope you'll find this funny anyway! Hey Sunrise, there are some more scenes in Over a Barrel involving the train. If you'd like to help out with some more deleted scenes for this episode by replacing the train with Gordon for me because I'm out of ideas here then I'd be very grateful.
Sunrise Blossom: No problem. Bye Dede42!
| RolePlayer48 chapter 4 . 7/16
Whoa! Too much posting in one day! I can't read THAT fast! At least, give me at least chance to read one chapter at a time and post one review at a time! But still, great chapter! And yep, Pinkie's been taking lessons from Timon I can tell with the whole "torture whoever steals your line" thingy! Bye!
| RolePlayer48 chapter 3 . 7/16
Nice two chapters! Speaking of doing a lot of posting...
Derpy: Is the next Dr. Whooves story coming soon? It's pretty overdue.
Merlin: Hopefully so. We know how much RolePlayer48 loves Sword in the Stone as well!
Me: Oh be patient the two of you. Bye Dede42! Good luck with the rest of your posting!
| Musa Tecna bestfriends forever chapter 2 . 7/16
| RolePlayer48 chapter 1 . 7/15
It's okay Berry Dreams. We forgive you. And I'm sorry for what I said earlier. I was just worried how Dede42 would react to your earlier review since I have a very special friendship with her. Criticism I suppose is a thing that will happen to some, to me, I don't know, it's hard to tell really if criticism is the same as bullying. But yeah, even if we get some more who aren't you like you and as you said "bugger us no matter what we say", we'll definitely try not to let them get the both of us down and make our work continue to be our pride and joy. Don't worry, Berry. You're forgiven.
| Berry Dreams chapter 1 . 7/15
Those reviews I’ve made... I never said her stories were ripoffs nor did I say I hated them. I just thought it’s a lot of effort to go through to just give an Oc a few lines, especially since Dede42 does have responsibilities outside of fanfic making, and thought that another way would be more helpful than writing the entire eight seasons (and possibly even more in the future) but if I am truly bugging you, then I’ll go away.
So, Defe42, I want to say that I’m sorry if I did make you worry or get to you, but I have to say that there will be times where you have to listen some criticisms and there will be times where commenters will just plain bug you just for the sake of bugging you not matter what you say. When that those times come, I hope you would be able to face them head on and make sure these fanfictions are your pride and joy.
Goodbye, and I’m sorry for the troubles I may have caused.
| RolePlayer48 chapter 1 . 7/15
Quick message to Berry Dreams who's once again said something that I know Dede42 isn't gonna handle that well. Does it really matter if it's like the original MLP episodes with the only difference being it's Sunrise hanging with Twilight? I mean, at first, I was a lot like you back when I was just "Guest reviewer" when I first met Dede42 on Applebuck Season back in February. I was at first concerned why there were stories just like the original MLP episodes with an OC with Twilight and ended up saying something really unintentionally hurtful which really got to her. So since then I took a politer attitude toward her and decided "Well, although others may have made similar stories that were just the original MLP episodes with an OC with them, Sunrise Blossom is actually a real sweetheart. I mean, she's got a DVD collection and favorite movies like mine (since taking this series even further with my offscreen deleted/extended scenes) So what if it's like the original? I don't care anymore! These are good once you get to know Dede42 more! Why should little things that others point out bother me?". My point being, Berry Dreams. I can understand with THIS review you just now posted that you're trying to be more politer, but I still kind of think the choice of words in those sentence/what you still think of these stories are really gonna upset Dede42 who puts a lot of effort into these things. Unlike you, I don't see this as a ripoff to the original MLP show, I see of it more as "How It Really Happened" or "What The Writers Of Hasbro Didn't Want To Show Because They Wanted Twilight To Be The Star" or pretty much like Lion King 1 1/2 really! If you don't like these stories then we won't judge you but you don't HAVE to read them if you don't like them or don't want to. It's kind of like Youtube trolls. They post a hate comment on something good for no reason when they could be doing other stuff. I can understand if you just discovered these stories upon browsing for MLP fanfiction, but if you don't like them then what's the point of reading them? Seriously? Dede42 has autism and reacts differently to what others say in they're reviews. So even the odd criticism (hurtful or polite or not either of those) can really upset her. Please leave us alone? It's all we ask.
Robin Hood: Wow! That has to be the most bravest thing you've ever done, RolePlayer48. Standing up to Berry Dreams and defending Dede42 like that. Dare I say that that was much braver than anything I've done. I'm proud of you kid.
Me: Thanks Robin. Okay, now that we have that out of the way, great first chapter to Over a Barrel. See you Monday. Don't let whatever Berry Dreams says get you down. We can still get through this.
| Musa Tecna bestfriends forever chapter 1 . 7/14
| Berry Dreams chapter 1 . 7/14
Yes, Sunrise did support Rarity in the last story but it didn’t make much of an impact on the episode. Things like bandaging up Spike’s tail and making a few comments here and there doesn’t make Sunrise memorable, it feels more of a reminder that she’s there after paragraphs and paragraphs of not mentioning her.
For an example in this story, Sunrise just agrees and make obvious comments (“They all have feathers,” which is obvious because anyone who saw that episode would know that). Sunrise feels like an afterthought. I mean, she doesn’t need to do absolutely amazing things, like save the day by herself.
Like I’ve said before, I like Sunrise in ‘Two Sisters... One Fate’ because when Sunrise moves to Ponyville, she’s doing things outside of the series (like taking over the Apothecary, meeting the rest of the Mane Six differently than Twilight would had, having a sleepover with them, stopping Shadow Star).
In Return of Nightmare Moon Part 1, (while, yes, she tried to get Twilight make friends) Sunrise didn’t do much besides making comments here and there (“Twi, I think Spike’s in love,” which is obvious visually). You could save yourself a lot of trouble if the story went along differently. Like instead of just a complete (and almost exact) novelization of the pilot episode, how about it starts at Twilight all tired and annoyed about all of the things that happened on her first day at Ponyville, wondering why Sunrise even likes it here because of the letters and photos she’ve sent? But when she enters the library, she was shocked to find the party there with Sunrise having fun. Or something like that.
It’s just that these novelizations are too exactly like the real deal that it isn’t too fun to read, even with Sunrise there. Why read this when the readers could just watch the actual episode?
That’s why I suggest that maybe Sunrise should sometimes go on her own adventures. Because that’s where Sunrise seem to shine the best, when she’s on a different adventure than with her sister. I’m interested on how Sunrise interacts with one of Mane Six by herself, or with any other character like Scootaloo.
I think you have the potential for that, like ‘Hearth’s Warming that Almost Wasn’t’. There, Sunrise felt she’s actually doing something, not a simple comment any one else could make.