|Reviews for Splatoon 2: Octo Expansion|
| nolankphillips chapter 10 . 9/21
| U09Mq chapter 1 . 9/4
| Guest chapter 3 . 8/9
WRONG, its: Octa 8.
Like the fic.
| Plain Ol' Spectator chapter 5 . 8/9
This fic is just so uninspired and lazy, I can't say.. a whole lot about it really.
It's a 1:1 adaptation of Octo Expansion and nothing more, or less, than that. Everything, from the dialogue to the descriptions, is exactly like it is in the game, with no truly notable additions or twists. It's not interesting or new, and there's not much of an incentive to keep reading when the reader already knows how the story that they've already seen/played through will end.
The few original bits don't help that much, and are simply lacking. The dialogue and mannerisms from this Agent 8 do a poor job at displaying any notable traits in her character, and her responses to other characters are so tacked-on and sloppily written, they don't add anything and feel inconsistent with the game dialogue. It's as if they're there just for the sake of having your Agent 8 say that they exist. And then there's this side story with Octoling boys in the army that's barebones and not very engaging. It does a poor job at complementing the OE plot.
The structure is also lacking. The biggest problem with it is having all of the lines of dialogue clumped together in a paragraph or two, which makes the story confusing and hard to follow at points. Separating the lines of dialogue from each other would make for a cleaner structure and help the reader better distinguish who's saying what. The descriptions are also extremely short and plain, doing a poor job at showcasing the environment or the character's actions and mannerisms and failing to captivate the reader into the story, utilizing little else other than short sentences to communicate the bare minimum of what the reader needs to properly picture a scene.
This doesn't seem very good to me...