Reviews for Do Psychic Cats Dream of Electric Sheep?
ShadowVulpi chapter 42 . 4/25
I'm finally caught up! Took a while with several breaks in between parts, but I'm glad to have finally reached the most recent chapter.

I've expressed my opinions over the course of the story and for the most part, those opinions have remained unchanged, though I can give a bit of an overview review that'll be pretty short.

Basically, I've been enjoying this story a lot. There are moments where I feel it lags and there are too many side plots going on, but I can at least say this story never had the issue of being too similar to the actual PSMD. It's very much a different sort of re-telling and as I said in a previous review, the story at times can feel like it's taking place in a different universe than PSMD because of this. This was especially true during Act 3, but it thankfully mellowed out once Espurr and Tricky got back into the plot and the story offered promise of keeping the spotlight on the two of them for the most part. I have a lot of faith that you'll find a good balance between in the next part, though I'll be sure to let you know if I feel it's becoming skewed toward one side.

At the end of the day, I don't think this story is for everyone. Politics can be a bit much for some people and it can be difficult to grasp when there's so much going on and you need to pay attention to the words not being said rather the spoken words. And there's also the horror aspect to the story, which can also be a bit much for many. But as someone with some stranger tastes in fiction than most, I've been enjoying this a lot. I think it also helps that while the story is political, it's very much Pokemon-centerd politics. I can see parallels between things that happen in here and the real world, but they're not blatant parallels and I appreciate that. I find stories that get political and make very obvious references to our reality to be too much on the nose for me and thus unenjoyable.

Looking forward to seeing more of your work with this.
FroggerBerbus chapter 2 . 4/24
The wheel has guided me towards this domain.

First things first, this is an intriguing choice of premise. A Super AU that plays some things straight, but I already see the seeds of some divergences outside, the elephant in the room aside. Having Espurr replace the MC has a lot of potential, and I'm quite eager to see how the void is filled by the lack of the NPC Espurr.

As for what I can say about these opening chapters, pace is nice. Things happen quickly, doesn't try to beat in what those who've already played Super Mystery Dungeon are already familiar with, and does more to characterize Super's cast already. Already saw quite a few mentions of miscellaneous background characters that were never referred to in the original game. Those little details do good work of retaining intrigue.

On the note of cast, I quite like how vibrant they are already. Audino has an enjoyably stern side, Watchog's antics are already fun to see, and Tricky is taking the character to a hilarious extreme. Assuming the two stay as a team, her and Espurr are going to be quite the duo. But yeah, how you present your characters is the standout trait of your fic so far.

Honestly there's not much I can give in the way of criticism. These two chapters do what the first two chapters should do and they do it well. Worst thing I have to say is that Watchog seemed to disappear suddenly shortly after he first showed up and the transition to Tricky introducing the square could be seen as somewhat awkward but that's really it. I like what I see so far, keep at it.
LukerUpgradez chapter 11 . 4/24
This review will be broadly covering everything from the start of the story to right before episode one. Sorry if any of my points don't make sense - I'm a bit sick, so my brain power is not all there. If you need me to clarify something, please let me know.

Overall, I would say this is a pretty worthwhile read! As you mention in the author's note towards the beginning, Super Mystery Dungeon adaptations are incredibly rare; it's great that more stories are seeking to fill in a niche. I'd like to dissect it as an adaption of the original game, and then turn to Electric Sheep on its own merits:

This story's biggest strength in adaptation is the way that it reorders and tightens the plot of the original game. Utilizing multiple perspectives to allow the Expedition Society's investigation into Dark Matter to happen simultaneously with Espurr's school days was a very smart way to eliminate the disjointed aspects of the story. I am also impressed by the story's general 'tightness' - there are very few scenes that feel like they are generally irrelevant to the plot in some way, meaning that it's constantly moving forward.

However, I feel like this adaptation makes somewhat of a tradeoff. Where Electric Sheep does improve the source material's story, it sacrifices in terms of character quality. It's hard to articulate, but throughout my reading, I couldn't help but feel like there was about the majority of the cast here. Like, the story is trying to emulate and expand the original idea of a character, but in doing so, they seem to either become a bit flanderized or lose some of their original charm. I see the former in Tricky and Watchog's characters, who had their core character traits dialed up to eleven, and the latter in the Expedition Society, particularly Ampharos, who is spends more time without his comedic charm than with it. I think most of this is a byproduct of trying to lessen the levity and increase the seriousness of the story - a tone change that's not necessarily bad, but it's not super appealing to me personally.

I do find the clear setup for the alterations to the original plot kind of interesting through. The idea of essentially adding political drama, with this HAPPI takeover plot and this coverup of Pokemon Square being turned to stone, has a lot of potential to really make Electric Sheep its own sort of beast. I find it odd in terms of adapting the original, but I won't make any judgements on it just because it's new.

Speaking of that, let's address the most original aspect of this adaptation: Espurr. She's a fairly interesting protagonist! I find the way that she's slowly come into the human-turned role, rather than knowing immediately. very engaging. All the scenes linking Espurr to Dark Matter really help to build her character and set the stage for the inevitable endgame. A personal favorite part of all this was the way her literacy was handled - I was not expecting the outcome that plot point led to! While her characterization is a bit spotty in places, I can't really say there's much wrong with how she was handled.

Unfortunately, I don't think I can say the same for Tricky's character. All of the character flaws of the original Super Mystery Dungeon partner have been overplayed much more intensely, thanks to both her own actions and the way the entire Serenity Village cast treats her, and I think it causes her redeeming qualities to be heavily overshadowed. While Espurr spends a lot of time with her, I was never really sold on their friendship - it felt like Espurr's reaction to being pestered and dragged around by Tricky changed on a dime, rather than it being an earned friendship. I also really struggle to understand why Tricky behaves the way she does in relation to her backstory. If her rambunctious adventuring and carelessness resulted in the brutal death of a close friend and classmate that she was unable to stop, why did Tricky not come out of this experience afraid of mystery dungeons, or afraid of being helpless? I feel like her 'willful forgetfulness' and 'explorer's drive' is too underplayed to sell me on the idea that Tricky would double down on these aspects of her character, rather than shy away from them.

I will say that, outside of the context of the original story and not regarding Tricky, the vast majority of the cast is perfectly functional for the story and works well. Nearly every character has something that they are clearly here to do, even the Serenity Village characters, and it's hard for me to say anybody else has been mishandled up to this point in the story.

Another matter to note is the quality of the story's prose. Aside from some minor, easy-to-fix flaws, the narration in this story feels very professional. It's detailed, articulate, and usually well-balanced with the dialogue in a scene. There's not a lot to criticize here - and the longer this story is worked on, the more the prose is sure to improve even further.

Some asides to end this off:
-The early chapters, especially the prologue, 1, 2, and 3, were my personal favorites. They were all the right length and rarely had a dull moment.
-I like the way that underlining and bold were used for subliminal messaging. I remember deciphering the prologue's and being like 'oh hello'.
-Hah, this story really went all in on the Warped Skies references. Not even just stating the Explorers team happens to be a Meowth/Shinx pair - Exam Day explicitly confirms that Team Ion, including the original characters, were the ones to stop the time crisis. I haven't finished Warped Skies, but is there anything that actually prevents these fics from happening in the same canon? If not, I find that very amusing.

And that's about it. Again, sorry if it's a little scatterbrained. I hope this proves helpful to you! I think I might continue this fic when I find time again - I want to see where this goes.
ShadowVulpi chapter 37 . 4/18
Alright so I'm not quite done reading this story yet, I really do want to catch up, but I thought I'd take a moment to leave a review here for now.

Gotta say, Part 3 of this story is taking a bit of a different turn than I was expecting. I figured it would remain Espurr focused like the last two parts with some focus shift between outsiders, but it seems like this part of the story is almost treating Espurr like a side character at this rate. I guess I'm not entirely sure how I feel about that. On one hand, this story does give off the vibe that it's a whole-world kind of story and it needs different perspectives to be told efficiently. It honestly kind of reminds me of with how in Season 2 the focus kept changing between like five different people in every episode and they were all over the place in terms of location and motivations. So I suppose in the natural evolution of things, the story was always going to become much more grand scale and couldn't just focus on little old Espurr and Tricky.

But on the other hand, I guess I can't help but wish they stayed the main focus. They both really grew on me and suddenly not seeing them that much in the story is saddening. This really isn't so much a criticism so much as it is just me rambling about how I feel the story could have been okay just focusing on Espurr and Tricky, but I do understand why you've shifted focus away from them. The story's gone for a very political angle now and two little kids aren't really going to be involved in that too much.

Which I guess brings me to something else I've been wanting to say for a while. I do like this political atmosphere you've given to the story, I really do. I like seeing the deceit, the words between the lines, the shrewd tactics. But I suppose I have to ask, would you really consider this PSMD anymore? I mean yes, there are still PSMD characters all over the story, but I feel like that this point, the story didn't have to be PSMD. It's seemed to become something else entirely, something that can still be very much Pokemon, but maybe not PSMD. It's a noble thing, trying to do a re-telling of PSMD and making it entertaining, but I really am starting to wonder if you had been better off making this a more original PMD story since so much of the story is no longer recognizable from PSMD. If anything, all of the characters that are supposedly from PSMD kind of feel like vague references at this point due to their different characterizations.

Anyway, just wanted to write down these thoughts. I still like this story, don't get me wrong. I wouldn't be reading this story and reading it as fast as I am if I didn't like it. It was just something I thought I'd share because watching this story evolve into what it is now really has got me wondering about all of these things. And the best way to articulate these thoughts is to well, tell you about them.
TheForge64 chapter 40 . 2/6
Well first of all, I'm very glad that this story has returned. I saw your announcement in your profile that Psychic Sheep was coming back in February, and I've been eagerly anticipating the next chapter since.

And boy does it deliver! There's more of these delightfully horrifying Void Shadows, a dungeon that seemed to me left no detail irrelevant, and then the pleasant surprise of EVERYONE making it out alive (although I suppose they aren't out of the gate yet)!

Allow me to say here, your story is an absolute pleasure to read.
ShadowVulpi chapter 29 . 1/30
Alright, figured it's time I leave one more review since I've finished Part 2 and had some thoughts about the ending and the two special episodes.

I was really happy to see the ending of the Espurr arc where she and Tricky finally get ready to leave the tutorial town and go to the Expedition Society. I was always wondering when this was gonna happen in the story, and I'm glad to see that it finally has! It's not to say I didn't enjoy my time in the small tutorial town though; I actually really enjoyed getting to know all the kids and seeing how such a small town could still be impacted by the looming evil coming about. I'm surprised you developed this honestly forgettable part of the game so well and though I do look forward to getting out of the town, I will miss this quaint little place. But alas, the plot demands that Espurr get going, and for a perfectly understandable reason as well.

Now onto the special episodes. I really liked them, I gotta say! Through these two chapters, I learned a lot about why anything in the story is happening after the information being teased over the past nearly thirty chapters, like about Primarina, Sparkleglimmer, and all that. It really showed how Dark Matter has gotten into literally everyone's heads and is manipulating them so easily by feeding entirely off their negative thoughts and compelling them to act on their darkest desires. Honestly kind of reminds me of my Plagued Selves, except that everyone can have Dark Matter talk to them. And you don't get eldritch superpowers from DM, usually. Even though I know Sparkleglimmer is being manipulated the whole time by DM, considering what it wants to actually do, I can actually see why she does what she does. She had to basically watch what was supposed to be her saviors after a continental disaster start taking advantage of everything, knowing nothing would be done about it, and to top it off, watch her dad die at the hands of the rescue team federation's leader. I don't know if I agree with what she does in the present, but I can at least see how she got to that point.

The only thing I don't get about all of this is honestly with some of the details revealed in these special episodes. So the chapters are being framed as DM showing Sparkleglimmer everything that's happened in the past so that she'll be motivated to keep doing whatever she's doing in the present. My question is... why would it show her that it's responsible for her dad's death? I mean, if the supposed helpful voice showed me that he was the one that goaded my dad's killer to act, I don't know if I'd wanna work with that voice anymore. It also outright shows Sparkleglimmer that it's manipulating several pokemon to outright hate her and oppose her, yet she doesn't seem to be particular alarmed by this. I find that really weird that she'd be okay with this, unless I'm missing something in the presentation of how DM is showing her these memories.

Besides that little issue I had (even if it was more of a moment of confusion), I enjoyed these last few chapters a lot. Looks like the horror has come out full force and the conspiracy has really unrolled. Looking forward to reading more of your stuff when I get around to it again!
Z2H chapter 1 . 1/29
This review is for the entire story so far.

To start off, I want to say the premise is pretty interesting, and the title itself is great. I will admit I'm adverse to novelizations, or even ones with just slight alterations to the canon to create a 'new' story, but at a first glance and after a read of the entire thing, I can safely say this story is not a typical novelization with a slight change of canon at all - it's a different beast altogether, and one that was pleasantly enjoyable to read through. Now, the events that PSMD are fuzzy to me at best, but I do remember the school and the Expedition Society being fairly slow or even rushed in some cases. I assume your intentions going into this story were to amend these mistakes and produce a higher quality and more satisfying tale told through Espurr of all Pokemon, which I do think works, even if the some of the presentation feels unorganized or generally difficult to follow.

I will start things off with plot, which offers an advantage and disadvantage to the story. We first start things off with following Espurr, and eventually Tricky, with their exploits within the school and village, much like the game, but obviously with different elements or events changed outright to fit this new narrative being told. All things considered, I feel as if these changes are welcome ones, like with The Crooked House and the relationships between the school children. But I feel the only thing holding this 'school' part of the story together are the character interactions and the entire drama boiling between Tricky and Deerling. There are segments that include glimpses into the Expedition Society and other parts of the world, but the main emphasis on the school does drags things quite a bit. Now, there are aspects of the school itself that I liked, such as the worldbuilding segments that told more of the humans that vanished thousands of years ago. It also teaches the reader well the different mechanics one would expect to see more of in the story.

Pacing of longfics is a challenging thing, and even something I struggle with myself, so I don't consider this to be a deal breaker for many readers like myself, but something that I noted while reading.

Moving onto the next part of the story, here we see more of the inner workings of the true story unfolding bit by bit, with HAPPI and these Void Shadows from beyond creeping their way in to influence the other guilds, cities, and continents of the world. While we saw the destruction of one town in the first part, we are given even more sights of Pokemon being petrified, and even a trip into the Voidlands this early on. It's a nice change of pace from the school, and there are certain revelations that were cool to see occur. My sole problems with this part of this story more fall upon the amount of characters and plot threads that seem to be going on. There are many of them, and it's hard to exactly determine which are exactly relevant to understand, and what ones are simply there to fill in the gaps. I will discuss this issue more with characters, but I will move on to worldbuilding next.

The worldbuilding of this story is what I truly appreciate most, and I really like how fleshed out it all is. From the interconnected politics to the massive corporation that is HAPPI. The latter of which is what I found most interesting, as while HAPPI is mentioned in the games, these corporate or business entities are never explained, which always leads for authors to make interesting interpretations of. I really like how HAPPI is presented in this story, and how this ancient evil isn't the only thing that is trying to take over the world. While the constant scenes of paperwork and trading did tire me out, the idea and pure bureaucracy kept me entice to see what drastic move HAPPI would do next.

Now onto characters, and they are quite a lot. I found myself liking the majority of them, even some of the ones that weren't used as much... or killed of.

With Espurr, I am very mixed about her. She can be very dull, flat, and generally boring personality wise (that could be an intention of yours), or she can be very snooty and mean in some cases with the school children. It's hard to find an exact read on her, but I never truly disliked her like some characters; cough Pancham. As for Tricky, I really loved how energetic and playful she was, acting like an child would in this scenario. While her actions can verge on annoyance to others in the story (and her backstory being as tragic), she provides a sense of childlike wonder that PMD exudes, and it's nice to see that remain in this story.

For the other characters, I found myself not exactly caring much for them, with some exceptions like the school children, Zoroark, and Sparkleglimmer (and Nylo-what's his face that I thought was a Xenomorph for a solid minute in your art). It's clear that more time was spent on them, and that's why I never really cared for the others while reading. One example I will mention is Eevee and Fletchinder - a pair that seemed to exist solely to be petrified. There's always going to be filler characters in stories (especially in PMD stories with guilds, which I am guilty of), but these characters take up screen time from the other more important characters and it's very distracting trying to follow the main story, the already established character stories, and these new ones that offer little relevance to the grand scheme of things. I'm not sure about characters like Holly, Granite, Cinder, Nickit, or Murkrow just yet, but they also never really felt too important. (Rip Bunnelby, though)

To finish things off, I will talk about prose. I am not going to talk much about it, considering my own prose isn't really great, but there's some things to point out. First off, all of it is generally competent, easy to follow, and not too overbearing or skimpy with its descriptions. There are exceptions, however, and points of which that irk me. One example I will mention is the Scooby Doo-esque spiel Alice gives the impostor Simisage on how she found out he was a phony. It's very jarring to go from reasonably worded dialogue to a giant barrage of information in one large paragraph. This is something that I also went through with one of chapters, and it's a detail that us both could probably improve on. One other thing I will note is the usage of POVs. In some chapters, they are reasonable, and can show a character's perspective well. In other chapters, that is tons of POV switching, which disorientates the readers. An example of this being the Riolu focused chapter that switches constantly between his past, the present, and the different settings they're in.

To end off the review, I do want to say I enjoyed it. There's a lot of interesting pieces and characters that click together nicely in a well built world, with some flaws as all stories contain, of course. I can tell you really have a passion for this story, either through the amount of art you have created, or the general length of the story and its contents, so there's no denying that the story is lazy or generic or anything.

Keep up the good work!
TehSammichMan chapter 4 . 1/26
V-Wheel—a tad late but here nonetheless.

We're in chapter 3 when we get our first explicit reference to the overall conflict, which is respectable in terms of PSMD adaptations. Much of the time the Serenity Village section of Super novelizations goes on a bit too long, but the pacing I've witnessed thus far cuts off most of the fat, so good job. I noticed Nuzleaf is strangely the last semi-important character we have to meet from Serenity Village as well. Though, it looks like the name of your next chapter means we'll be seeing him, and possibly the PC from the games.

I'd lean towards saying this fic's greatest strength so far is in the strong conveyance of character through dialogue. There's a lot of indirect characterization going on, many instances more subtle than others. Tricky seems to only speak in one-phrase sentences or run-on sentences, with no in between. It livens up the text and puts an exclamation point to every quote's complement in prose. The one character that stands out negatively in this regard, though, has been Espurr. It's taken a lot to get her to emote at this point in the story, and while it might be more fitting for her than any other character in the game to be impassionate, blank slates without dynamic dialogue don't make for very compelling characters.

It's difficult to engineer compelling amnesiacs in introductions, and something I myself still haven't even been able to pull off, but I noticed certain missed opportunities when it comes to developing Espurr's character. For one, why wouldn't she get angry about being deceived into entering a dungeon with a broken arm? The same question applies for when she was forced by the Vice Principal to perform manual labor. I felt like those were total A-hole moves, without hardly so much as even a mental peep from a normally very introspective Espurr in protest.

So far, these first couple of chapters have played out as a fairly stock-standard—though well-written—introduction to the world of PSMD. I'm going to continue on towards Lively Town, or anywhere else the story begins to branch off from the source, and get a better feel for it (and probably a bit better criticism, at that). Sorry it took so long to get this to you! I graduate this semester and my life's going to be a whirlwind for a good chunk of it.

Thanks for the read!
ShadowVulpi chapter 25 . 1/25
Alright, figured I'd leave a review here since this chapter is the end of an arc and the next chapter seems to be a bit of an epilogue. Plus I had lots of thoughts I wanted to share and I worry they'll get boggled down by what happens in the next chapter.

First off, really liked this arc. Guess we could call it the IT homage/Crooked House arc. I feared for these poor kids' lives while they were inside the house and especially when the monster went after them and separated them. Nyarlathotep clearly knew the best way to deal with groups is to split them up and drown them in their fears! Too bad it didn't account for these kids having the willpower to overcome their fears and rejoin and beat it up...

The house itself had a very ominous vibe to it that I really dug. Loved the descriptions of the black ooze all over the place and the escalating tension between the group while Nyarlatotep went around pretending to be some of the group members occasionally. Then of course there was going on in the Void Lands with Riolu. It made a nice complimentary piece watching him struggle to survive in this literal hell-land and slowly lose everyone he tried to help, all so it tied back to him helping Espurr find her friends as a sort of way to atone. There were a lot of times some aspects of the horror could have been done better, for the most part, this arc was quite unsettling and suspenseful.

Now onto some issues I had with this arc.

For starters, I'll start with Riolu's story. Now, I really do like him. I loved how you actually made him like a dog (unlike most Riolu I know...) who mostly saw the world with his ears and his nose, not through his eyes. I even liked his story, like I mentioned in the paragraph above. My only problem is the way it's put with the current Espurr arc. You try telling both their stories at the same time in the same chapter, and it really doesn't flow right to me. Half the time, I keep forgetting that the events of Riolu's chapter were in the past and weren't happening alongside Espurr's venture. I'm conflicted about how you could have resolved this though because while you could have made it a special episode, you would have done this in the middle of the Crooked House arc, right when Espurr is separated from her friends and the whole time we're reading about Riolu's story, we're wondering "well what's going on with Espurr?". On the other hand, keeping the chapters the way they are now interrupts the flow for me since it's like 1/8th Espurr centered, and then 7/8th Riolu centered. Maybe you could introduced him earlier and shown him on a parallel journey alongside Espurr's and maybe that would have worked. That way their meeting would have been more impactful and I wouldn't have to wonder "well who exactly is this Riolu?".

The other issue I had with this chapter is relatively minor, but still stuck out to me. While I was down for the horror of these chapters, you tended to reuse a lot of words, particularly "goo". Like 30 times in "All Together Now" alone. It really brings down the mood since it's the same word over and over again, not to mention I don't really find "goo" to be a scary word. "Slime" honestly feels more fitting to me and has more of an ominous air to it. So might want to work on using different words for a bit of variety.

Anyway, that's all I gotta say for now! Good work! I'm really enjoying myself with this story.
FistsTornAsunder chapter 9 . 1/15
Okay so, first of all.
How dare you.
How dare you not make the title of this fic "Do Psychic-Type Pokémon dream of Mareep?"

Secondly, this is really good. Like, I'm not usually a fan of stories that take place within established Mystery Dungeon worlds because the worldbuilding in the games is "meh" at best. But I found this a couple days ago, have been reading it in between study sessions, and I can tell you it's really good stuff.

You give depth to some aspects of the world, keeping it canon-friendly (a hard thing on its own) while building upon what the original game did, and you also keep everyone consistently in-character. Which is a feat, honestly, because Espurr can be a very hard character to write dialogue for. Plus, the way you use terms like "anymon" to make the characters' dialogue feel more "realistic" is very organic and something that could happen in the actual games.

It's very simple stuff, but it adds up, and it's the kind of thing that makes you believe that these characters are real and live in a world of their own, with a completely different culture. The banter between them, how they bounce off of each other, can be hard to translate when "adapting" a game into a story, but you don't fall on the same pitfalls as most writers, like non-descriptive dialogues and constant repetition of information to produce "quippy" dialogue. I'm a sucker for ragtag bunches of misfits, stuff like Community and Guardians of the Galaxy, and you nail the characterization that makes these interactions fun and engaging.

The only thing that I don't like would be the little cuts between scenes. I know it's a staple of PMD fanfics at this point, but It's just a pet peeve of mine, and it makes transitions a bit rushed. I understand it would take more effort, but I would like a more organic transition between sequences without having to jump from place to place like that.

Also, there is no need to add the POV characters after each of them, because you tend to immediately show the reader who's in each scene, and they end up feeling kind of pointless, and it feels like you don't trust your reader to know who's going to be featured in the next scene. With your already good descriptive skills, you manage to introduce each character with each new scene without it feeling repetitive, and yet you still feel the need to add the little indication at the start? Trust me, you don't need that, and you can actually use the surprise of not outright showing who's in the scene to your advantage.

Other than that, really solid read. Will continue reading it sporadically in between study sessions because I want to know what you do with these characters.
ShadowVulpi chapter 19 . 1/14
Alright I've been reading this story again since I figured it was time to make more progress and also because of favors you've been doing for me. So, let's get this started.

When I finished Part 1 of this story, I really did think that Tricky and Espurr were going to leave the village soon and go to the expedition guild. I guess I was wrong since they're still in town! Not that this is a bad thing of course. You've surprised me by making the town life still relatively fun to read about with all of hush hush drama going on between the adults and the much more overt drama with the kids. I have to say, I was really happy seeing all of the kids growing as people in these few chapters. Deerling has finally started to get over what happened with Tricky, Goomy has grown a spine, and Tricky is being more mindful of her actions after finally realizing how easily she leads people into danger. There's even some hint of Pancham maybe changing a little after Tricky blasted him in the face for all the shit he gave her, though I'll see if that actually happens in later chapters. Who knows, maybe he won't change one bit next time I see him. Because of all the kids' growth, I'm suspecting you'll have a lot in store for them when it comes to the plot, even when Tricky and Espurr inevitably leave town.

I'm also liking more of the horror bits trickling into the story, particularly with the voices in some character's heads and the ghosts from Ancient Barrow. I forget exactly what went down in Ancient Barrow in the games, but I do recall that it was mostly pointless to the plot and could literally be written out of the game and nothing would be lost. However, it seems that you're building up to it having more connections to the plot with how Espurr keeps seeing ghosts in her house that go back to the Barrow. Perhaps Dark Matter lives in there momentarily, or wants to lure Espurr in there? With how this chapter ends, I'll be finding out real soon since it's finally talking to her directly! Either way, I am liking how you're ramping up the dread of the story. It's still pretty subtle and isn't full-blown yet, but I can tell you're getting real close to making things escalate.

Now for some criticisms. I already mentioned my problems with your rapid POV shifts in my last review, so I won't reiterate that here. However, I will mention that I feel like a lot of these POV are kind of pointless. Like, did I really need to see Deerling watching Espurr and Tricky driving a cart down the road or how an Eevee is flabbergasted at some kids buying all the lumber she needed? I could probably get the same mood from Espurr or Tricky's POV. I get that you're emulating the games/TV shows, but it just really kills the flow of things, especially because it feels a lot like filler. Like everything with the Eevee and the bird. They were just there to offer mild comedy and then suddenly, petrified. I get you did that because you wanted to show how literally anyone can be turned to stone at any moment, but I really didn't care about this Eevee and her lumber quest, so seeing her meet that fate made me go "god finally, now I don't have to deal with her anymore".

The only exception I have to this is Sparkleglimmer's POV. If I pretend I haven't seen all the fanart of her for later chapters, I can tell she's actually important because she has weird suggestion powers, powers you don't just give to an unimportant NPC.

Anyway, despite that complaint, I'm still enjoying myself. I'll be seeing you next time, where it looks like things start getting pretty serious based on those later chapter titles...
InkyDewott502 chapter 7 . 12/28/2021
Hello Espy! It was nice being able to read through "Do Psychic-Type Pokemon Dream of Electric Sheep" Chapters 1-6 for our Writers Union review trade. I'm going to briefly cover quite a few topics, in semi-chronological order.

Alrighty let's start overall, the fact that this story begins off as an adaptation makes it very interesting. And one that exchanges a side character for the hero. Because Espurr is now taking the place of the hero, or the main character this seemingly destroys her old role… As I don't think the main character is playing Espurr’s role as of now. Maybe in the future chapters, as I was only six chapters in.

The prose is uniquely calm and dressed up with a selection of adjectives. Paragraphs with bolded words to hold meaning in various section themes caught me off guard but was a welcome addition. During certain tense sections, the underlined letters being used to send a foreboding message was also clever. Personally, I am not fond of seeing text flairs used for things besides thought processes or important dialogue/sounds. But again, just something different.

It was nice that you named each section but it may not have been necessary. Being slightly vague with each section, not outright telling the readers what it will be can pay off. This can be used to force the reader into paying more attention to the content. But it is really minor so it doesn’t matter.

For an adaptation, this is a unique one. I am biased as I am more fond of Super than Explorer’s of Sky, which has way more adaptations published. Hopefully, this will inspire more authors to take a crack at them for this game.

The pacing of the story is a bit odd in the beginning bunch of chapters. In certain chapters, a reshaped familiar scene is either drawn out too long itself or causes a bit of a narrative slug in the scope of a chapter. Other times completely new content flows well in the beginning but then sort of piles on. But the pacing is rather difficult to implement in most content.

Every previously ingame cutscene is drawn out with great prose with additional details that are solely for Espurr. The various confusion, discomfort, and pain she dealt with as she adjusted to her “new” life. The scenery of certain locations, other than Mystery Dungeons are sparsely touched upon at times but the other details make up for it.

Other notable former story bits are the deviation from the normal course; such as a look into Nurse Audino’s daily journey, Espurr's interesting meetings and introductions to all the various school children when she's in the clinic, and the Expedition Society's discoveries.

Every Mystery Dungeon scene from the early chapters is based on one from the game. I was first put off by the way you handled them, as the cast doesn't encounter Pokemon or travel through the floors in a traditional way. But it works well in this story.

A way that you made this world feel alive was the use of Continental News and reports from various Pokemon. Mentioning life on the Water, Mist, and Air Continents in a little segment makes me wonder how soon in the early chapters we will diverge and get a firsthand experience.

In my opinion, the best thing about this adaptation is how you handled the Expedition Society and the members that we see. The characterization flows well with the pieces of dialogue I would expect of them and just a little more. I'm wondering how many liberties you took with all their little quips and quirks in conversation.

Mawile and Archen investigate why orders have stopped. Ampharos trying to spy, and or monitor on Espurr and Tricky. The early cases of "missing" Pokemon. Only to find that they have been turned Stone. The various conversations with town leaders or shopkeepers that explore the political and bureaucratic side of the world were excellent. I think these scenes were handled well but are related to the pacing issues.

The briefly mentioned energy that is formed when a human form that the Expedition Society is keeping tabs on is interesting. This seems to tie into the Nexus and the Shadow Creatures. Perhaps the Shadows that Mawile and Archen fought are also drawn to the energy that forms problems in Mystery Dungeons.

Because you’ve albeit partially, turned Audino into Espurr’s guardian and have Nuzleaf as her language teacher I’m wondering how the dramatical reveal will be handled. The last thing I want to say is that I really enjoyed and am rooting for Espurr and Tricky, you’ve transformed the Hero and Partner Pokemon into such great characters.

These are all my important thoughts for this review, I look forward to seeing more from “Do Psychic-Type Pokemon Dream of Electric Sheep?”
Gyeig chapter 5 . 12/13/2021
Once again, nice lore additions. They're fun and fit in pretty well.

Thus far I've generally been pretty postiive, but one thing that I did notice reading this chapter is that your prose could use a little work. It's generally serviceable, and it definitely has its moments, but there's times when it's kind of boring and unimaginative. It doesn't really 'feel' like there's anything going on, so to speak. This happens occasionally, and it is sparse enough to the point where it isn't too distracting, but it is still something to look at.

General thoughts on the fic to this point - solid opening. You've got something good going, and by the looks of it, you've kept up the momentum all the way up to the present. You're clearly a skilled author, and this is definitely a fic I would recommend to anyone interested in an SMD fic, even an MD in general.
Gyeig chapter 4 . 12/12/2021
I always wondered what happened to the characters from the other games, given that Super confirmed they're all part of the same world. Nice to see the 'gaps' being filled in, as it were. You're doing a solid job of expanding on this story. Furthermore, you're getting the characters from the games right as well. Their personalities are apparent, and their dialogue is just about what I would expect from them. Good job.
Gyeig chapter 3 . 12/12/2021
Again, your additions to the story serve as fun additional content. I'm glad you're not just repeating scenes from the games word for word here, but coming up with original content. Furthermore, I like how you're adding some species details. Always nice to see that little bit of realism in a story.

Not much else to say about this chapter, other than 'keep it up!'
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