|Reviews for The Ballad of Kali, Star-Destroyer, and the Lily of Death|
| Guest chapter 4 . 4/20
Very nice good luck on the next chapter!
| Mai-danishgirl chapter 4 . 3/30
Ooh, finally an insight into both Lily and her family. Very nice showing what kind of people they are.
And the little glimpses of Lily's new freedom is awesome. "She sat for a moment, marveling at it."
And the scene with the beautifly, as well as the outcome was great. I quite likes the line about beauty:
"Casey was the one who made it."
I almost feel sorry for those grunts, they really had no idea.
| OldSchoolJohto chapter 4 . 3/29
[I wish to understand this—this temper tantrum—before I quash it.]
I like how this sentiment parallels Lily’s frustration with not understanding why Ma isn’t trying harder to catch her.
So sweet how she wants to spoil Kali a little. And what a revelation it is that she can!
[ember of hot coal.]
Earnest Casey. Goodness. This maybe-crush maybe just admiration explains why Casey continues hovering around in spite of getting little emotional reward in response.
That shedinja... can’t wait to learn more. For a second I wondered if that would be the perspective character!
| Bird chapter 3 . 3/22
Ooh, Lily's caught her first pokémon! Tsifor's a treat, it's good to have someone with a little... maturity? Emotional growth? On the team, no offense to Kali or Lily. Speaking of Kali and Lily, Lily really needs to learn that she's pushing her pokémon too far before someone gets permanently injured. Poor Kali.
I have to clarify, that's nothing against your writing! Flawed characters are good, and this whole story is a treat to read. I look forward to following Lily as she learns how to not be a murder-machine :D
| OldSchoolJohto chapter 3 . 2/17
I like the implication that the ralts came to Lily not because of her “pure spirit” but because she has intense control over her mind and made herself unintrusive. She’s so intense, haha. It’s interesting that she has in Tsifor an opportunity for direct-line communication with her pokémon, but she’s rejecting that in favor of safety and control. I wonder if time will see her open up in that regard.
I have to wonder how much mileage she’s gonna get out of training Princess/Kali against psychic attacks, considering that fire/fighting typing in her future.
I loved the creepy description of the shedinja. Don’t see those too often in fic! Very curious to see what role it and it’s trainer will continue to play. Felt very ominous.
Overall, this story makes really good use of the pokémon as POV characters. We get a very clear picture of how their wants differ from Lily’s and how alien she seems to them, but Lily’s savvy awareness of her surroundings and direct approach to conversations grounds us and fills in any gaps in their knowledge.
It’s been a while since we’ve heard from any ninjas, and I’m waiting for that shoe to drop.
| Mai-danishgirl chapter 3 . 2/16
Alright, out-punching a ralts is both brutal and hilarious.
Aww, and Tsifor-ka is adorable, really like her story - little bird indeed.
Uhh, and your way of dealing with Shedinja is so very creepy, and amazing, actually I don't think I have read anyone going into its tru nature before. Casey being both exited and worried is such a neat thing.
| Mai-danishgirl chapter 2 . 1/24
Princess? Oh I love Lily.
And the hints about Lily worrying about posion was great.
| Mai-danishgirl chapter 1 . 1/24
There exists so many amazing premises, so many things that could be both epic and hilarious, but it is so very very rare that someone can take such an idea and actually write it well.
This is such a story.
All the subtle and not so subtle hints about Lily are wonderful - I cackled at the shroomish line.
And Kali is best fluff chicken.
| OldSchoolJohto chapter 2 . 1/18
Love the non-white cast that’s been cropping up in your fics as of late.
Also love the grumpy azumarill and Casey’s vest full of pockets.
Very cool to see Lily’s thought process through training. Feels apt. I’m definitely getting the sense that Lily is used to fighting more than just ninjas by herself.
This story continues to be charming and funny.
| nihile chapter 1 . 1/17
I love everything about Kali, Star-Destroyer! I really like how in her first battle one scratch is enough to knock her down and everyone else stands around awkwardly going, well, guess that's it.
["You're a kind soul, aren't you," Kali's human said after a moment of silence.]
Was Lily wondering if the nincada trainer was a plant by her ma, to help her along by giving her a pokemon?
Some of my favorites of Kali's lines:
[How nice, to walk alone, owning the road. A torchic in full control of her destinyyyyy—]
[She struck out with avenging fury, her steely beak tearing through their weak skin—]
[Hah! She hadn't known what misery was. This was misery, every pinion aching and her head a cloud of painful fog.]
I'm not super sold on the Lily of Death mostly because yeah, poking, prodding, and squeezing someone to their limit is kind of inconsiderate, but they seem like a comedically apt pair! I'm imagining Lily fighting off seven ninjas at once and Kali only manages to peck one of them when the moment is right.
| Farla chapter 1 . 1/16
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
[high-powered Pokémon ]
[Professor Birch fumbled around his desk, until he found the pokeball. He stared for a moment at the yellow post-it note affixed to the ball, which read, "Spoiled little bastard. Save for coordinators." ]
Is this because the torchic's behavioral issues won't be such an issue for coordinators, or because Birch enjoys their suffering? I'm amused either way.
[He could see the torchic was squirming frantically, but the girl's grip was iron. ]
[That is, until the door of his lab exploded inwards, and a band of masked men strapped him to a chair, demanding to know what, exactly, his business had been with the Lily of Death. ]
["Start off with peck!" her human bubbled.]
Aw, Lily's having fun!
["Hang on, if we've got her only pokemon, where exactly is she?"
A troubled silence fell.
"You don't think she's been—"
Something crashed through the window.]
So very excellent.
| OldSchoolJohto chapter 1 . 1/14
Well this is different! And, wow, you’ve been busy!
Found one typo:
[Professor Birch fumbled around his desk, until he found the stared for a moment at the yellow post-it note affixed to the ball,]
I’m betting there’s a missed space after a period and FFN registered it as a website and handily ate two words.
[Not really," the girl said. "If you mean shroomish poison, that's only fatal once it's been heavily distilled."
Birch and the girl stared at each other.]
Fun humorous moment here.
That moment reminds me strongly of The Cruel Prince. Definitely a love story with done cringe-worthy moments (it’s YA) but worth the read for the protagonist. She’s a sword fighter who microdoses on poison to keep from being poisoned by her classmates, who are magical and also suck.
I’m also reminded of Killing Eve, BBC America. Sandra Oh and Jodie Comer do sort of a spy vs spy with a great soundtrack and lots of murdery antics.
I liked the farewell of, “Keep safe.” Tells us a lot about Lily.
Really enjoyed Kali as a perspective character — though I’m wondering how she came up with that name for herself! And this is a fun way for a trainer to earn her Pokémon’s trust: she doesn’t need her to be strong.
It’s interesting to see how staunchly Lily is against handouts. I bet that says a lot about her relationship with “Ma.”
Glad you’re posting all these tiny treasures! It’s like a party sampler. Fun to see what else you’ve been tinkering with. And I feel like I’m starting to get to know your writing well enough that I can see some of your “calling cards.” Lily’s speaking style reminds me of Tanya a little — which isn’t a bad thing. Looking forward to see where you take this.