Years later, and I’m still hoping you’ll come back to finish this story. I’ve tried your other stories but they didn’t grip me like this one did at the time, still remains my favourite and I do hope you’ll come back to give this story an ending it deserves.
~Ryan

Sirius is innocent imperius

Outstanding story. Hopefully you return to finish it one day

Serves them right

What a bastard...

Huh... I did not see that coming. Well done, lol.

Congratulations James, you just lost your son for good...

The entire suing thing makes no sense, really. If Harry was able to establish that 1) the dragon was real, 2) that he had nothing to do with it, and 3) that Malfoy and co planned on framing him for it, then maybe.

But what is there to sue over here? There is no dragon. The crate was empty. So its just 3 dumbass students making false claims that are laughably easy to verify. And its not like Malfoy was publically slandering Harry. He just took it to a professor. So, he basically sees Harry has an empty, enchanted crate, belives it has a dangerous animal, and takes that information to a Professor… and thats grounds to sue the house for slandor?

It just makes absolutely no sense.

I think the main issue with this story is how inconsistent the characters (primarily Harry) act, all in the name of forcing drama and tension into the story.

A normal eleven year old, desperate for some form of family affection, might decide to care for his brother and father. Unfortunately, Harry foes not feel like an eleven year old at all. He reads like a slightly angsty, near sociopathic older teenager. With this in mind, it just feels so out of character to actually befriend or care about his brother or his father. Especially since, as far as I can tell, he has absolutely nothing in common with his brother. Their every interaction feels like less a natural meeting between brothers, and more like a forced, awkward plot device to feed Harry information about canon events that are being railroaded throughout the story.

There is also the matter of Malfoy. Draco, most of the time, seems like his canon eleven year old self. He’s a arrogant brat that is far more petty than charismatic or cunning. Then stuff like this occurs. He somehow has the cunning, resourcefulness, knowledge, and foresight to completely outmanever Harry and then put in motion a plan that would get him in serious trouble. The entire thing just seems entirely beyond Draco’s capabilities.

This story is completely garbage. There is no reason for it to be so LONG. So many filers... Dear god... What a waste of time.

How utterly boring. This is not an effective method to introduce backstory, world building, or character development. This diversion achieves nothing but to destroy the tension of the arc's climax. The reader doesn't care about any of this because all they care about it getting back to the plot.

The last two chapters are technically well written, but the placement is amateurish as best. This arc will end without any sense of satisfaction for the reader because of the poor timing.

Extremely disappointing.

The whole Rita/Malfoy thing is utterly ridiculous. You created a legal system so crazy merely to justify this plot point. Not good writing. The only valid point is the government corruption. I could see her being railroaded due to making a lot of enemies. Honestly, Malfoy could have made Rita his pet reporter just by threatening her son.

I've enjoyed the story quite a bit up to this point, but this chapter is a low point.

Sad to see a good story abandoned, but not surprised

It's always a shame to see something so large be abandoned, but I can see why. Major pacing issues, 10 times the amount of time needed was spent on "training". There's too many plates spinning, and some that have been spinning for far too long. Too many active characters and plots that have gone nowhere.

If nothing else, I'm sure writing this taught you a lot though. Overly ambitious, too much going on. Less is more.

It's frustrating that there'll never be any closure to everything you were doing, no pay off, but I got the feeling you didn't really know where you were going either. I'll look into your more recent fics, I'm sure they'll be much better

As my last review said, having all this last two chapters, twice as long, is even worse. Most of this should have be spread throughout the last 30 chapters in small segments.