|Reviews for Fractures|
| MissScorp chapter 7 . 9/2
Hi there! Tobias is definitely struggling with not being in his hawk form, isn’t he? I can understand that as he has spent so many years as the hawk and living away from society that he’s lost his ability to interact with humans as a human. Even his mom is a relationship that he struggles with. I’m assuming that it’s because of what happened and why he was stuck as a hawk for so long. It’s a shame, though, because they could use each other as a source of support. They’ve both suffered because of the war. Lost people they cared about. Have wounds the other could help to heal.
Loren is understanding of her son’s needs and his difficulties by agreeing to get sandwiches and eat them somewhere that they don’t have to deal with anyone who might recognize him and ask questions. I like that he recognizes at the end that his mother could morph and that he would have preferred that over walking and trying to make small talk. It shows that he does want a relationship with Loren, he just doesn’t know how to have one with her that is in human form. Hopefully it’s something that he will learn the more that he spends time with Loren and others as a human.
Another great chapter!
| Amanthya chapter 7 . 8/22
I'm intimately familiar with the whole beat-yourself-up-for-having-reasonable-trauma-reactions-to-trauma/overthink-everything mindset our boy Toby's in, here. Just calm down, Tobias; you don't feel / react like someone who had a "normal" life because um, well, you *didn't* have a normal life. It'd be weirder if you displayed no signs of that through your discomfort whatsoever. And no one (and by no one, I mean yourself) has a right to rake you over the coals for behaving like a veteran soldier who had a crappy childhood unresolved family issues oh-btw-species/identity-confusion instead of a so-called "normal" guy. Ffs, the whole situation's strange, so *you're* certainly entitled to be strange also!
I'd totally pet and hug him like all my fave characters (character-cuddles time!) but he would not appreciate that, hence the substitution of a pep-talk! : D
| darklover chapter 7 . 8/21
I was excited to see that this chapter was going to be about Tobias. It was too short for me :) I enjoyed the awkwardness with his mom. It was a well written chapter.
| Boris Yeltsin chapter 7 . 8/20
Poor kid. It sucks that so far, only the first ten Animorphs books have been brought to audio form. What's with that?
Another likely idea, something touching on Rachel's and Tobia's relationship, same for Jake and Cassie.
| Kyu chapter 6 . 7/28
I like that Jake is kinda proving Marco’s point about how he overthinks things as he literally starts thinking of different ways his proposal to Cassie could have gone but it looks like the smallest bit of healing has started there at the end.
Keep it up, really enjoying this.
| Guest chapter 3 . 7/13
I love this. I’m a huge R/T fan. Like they are totally on the same level as Rachel/Ross, Buffy/Angel, Peeta/Katniss...yep. I’ve always wanted someone to delve deeper into their relationship. Please update ASAP! :)
| MissScorp chapter 6 . 7/14
Hi there! Ah the power of hindsight. It can trap you in a deep dark web if you let it. Jake is trapped but can’t admit it, even when Marco calls it out. He thinks he’s being a dutiful brother by visiting his brother’s grave twice a week. He thinks he’s making up for not being there, for not stopping his brother from becoming someone other than who he remembers him as. The truth is that is his guilt forcing him to visit that grave. It’s his guilt making him ask what he could have done to stop Tom from changing as he did, what he could have done to save his life, and blaming himself because he wasn’t there and didn’t realize sooner that things were not as copacetic as he thought them to be.
Marco spying on him would aggravate me but I can understand it. Jake has become stuck. He isn’t living his life. He’s just going through the motions. And it’s worrying Marco and Cassie. Does Jake have a right to feeling betrayed? Yes. Does he have a right to feel like they went behind his back and talked about him? Yes. They did so because they care about him and want to help him through his grief. Marco doesn’t backdown when Jake gets angry about his spying him. He continues to push at Jake to make him admit that he was stuck in a never ending loop of grief. He’s not okay, no matter how much he tries to pretend that he is.
Another great piece!
| darklover chapter 6 . 7/13
Great chapter. Glad Marco got to Jake. I'm hoping he start moving on.
| Boris Yeltsin chapter 6 . 7/13
I love it.
| darklover chapter 5 . 4/29
Poor Jake. I think you did a good job exploring his thoughts on Tom's death. I really liked the line about how he should have been Tom's hero.
| MissScorp chapter 5 . 4/22
Hi there! Aw poor Jake :( war is not easy as it is but having losses of comrades or friends is a lot easier than losing a brother. Especially when you’ve won the war and are being touted as a hero. That one death will cast a pall over the celebration, the relief, the feeling of homecoming because it will be the one thing that you will wish that you could have stopped. Jake will forever hold himself accountable for Tom’s death.
It will always linger over him about how Tom might not have died had he made different choices, if he had been there, if he had done something to see his brother was protected; safe. That is all normal functions of grief. Oof, his thinking that his brother died hating him? Well, that’s a bitter pill to swallow. Especially since there’s no way of knowing for sure. Tom is dead and can’t tell him what his final thoughts were. Jake has to live with what they might have been for the rest of his life. And seeing his family all look at him with accusations in their eyes? That doesn’t help him to get beyond this tragedy.
It’s interesting how all the characters seem to have drifted apart after the war was over. Like some people still come together to talk but it seems like they are all going their own directions. As if they can’t process what happened without putting distance between them. Marco turning up as a flea made me chuckle because I didn’t think they could turn into anything they wanted. Flea would make for a great way to gather intel on people... long as you weren’t found out and smushed lol
This was a bittersweet but great chapter! Fantabulous job!
| Boris Yeltsin chapter 5 . 4/21
Loved it. Poor Jake, though.
| darklover chapter 4 . 4/9
As a writer, I totally understand the need to tinker with your writing and not feeling satisfied. As a reader, I can say that I enjoyed reading this chapter.
I felt the interaction between Tobias and Rachel was nicely done.
| MissScorp chapter 4 . 4/9
Hi there! Ah family is never an easy problem to solve. Especially when that family has a combative element to it like Rachel’s has. Not easy to deal with someone who disapproves if you and what you do. Who looks at you with eyes that reflect condemnation. Accusations. Not exactly a warm homecoming to look forward too. Kinda can understand why she’d balk at first about going home. Who’d want to go home knowing they face that? Her deciding to go after she considers the situation that Tobias faces with his family shows how she can see the opposite side of the fence and recognize that the grass is not always greener. She could be in a situation like him where his father was murdered right before him and his mother has no memory of him. He’s essentially alone in the world and spends his life as a hawk. She can go home and has Jordan and Sara, at least, who will be happy to see her.
The devastation at their former high school really puts something like war into vivid perspective. It’s a huge crater. One filled with the ashes of those who likely didn’t survive the battle. No bones for people to bury. Just ashes that will blow away in the wind. They paid a heavy price for this victory. The scars from it likely will never heal. A monument is a nice touch and a reminder of the fallen but it’s also a lasting testament for why they are the fallen.
Another good chapter!
| Boris Yeltsin chapter 4 . 4/8
Fine work. More of other characters when you can find ways to write them.