Semen Explosion Seal is a perfectly viable suicidal technique on the battlefield !

a...I.. I am okay with this abrupt end. it's peaceful. it's sadly comedic. i wont hear of shiro again. but i'll know he will still be uo to his old shenanigans, no matter what he does. this is an acceptable abrupt end. it's acceptable.. thank you author. i don't get immersed in atories, or participate in these thingsuch if at all. but seeing such fine work slowly chip at you because of others, to the point of dropping it, I was forced to say something for the sake of expressing my dismay and enjoyment of your story. i:ll miss aomi. i'll miss shiro. i'll miss hjs mother, might duy and gai. i'll miss his humor, and his shenanigans. i'll miss them. an empty plea for more i wish to offer but... alas. thank you. i sleep now. i feel myself passing ot. i needed to dinish this story. sleep xould wait. its fdtting recsbge... revenge now. do write moree, I lije amot.

i'm not much of a critic. i use reading as an escape, not as a way of enjoyment. so if i don't like something, I dont. if I do, I do. i have preferences but i dont take note of what i like. i actually pay attention to negatives quite a bit, mainly what I dont like. female protagonists (immersion), romance, lemon lime, harems, stupid plot progression, inexcusable power ups, op for the sake of op (if there's no progression, or it *being* the point. opm is the *perfect* example of doing exactly that, but properly) shit writing (sometimes the story makes up for the writing. it's rare but take opm as an example) and a bit more but overall i'm not picky. i can read slop, i can read not slop. . . i can also yap and am awaiting my damn doctorate in yapology. sigh. i like your style. i personally dont see much flaw with it, i like the distinct lack of romance so you're good there. action was nice, character personality was nice. not over the rop and it solidified the mc being a unique individual without making hia whole personality. it wasnt overwhelming, and the whole world didnt revolve around him, thinks happened when he wasn't around, so the outside influence was a really nice touch because it added lore and showed that while he was his mc, the world still ticked without him. he didnt have to be the center of all. i appreciate how much effort you went into learning about dna and biology altogether. it might have been surface level stuff but the dedication to go the extra mile with properly researched and accurate facts and stuff in your materials is always beru appreciated, we like how much you care about your work, that shows dedication to quality, and it shows your enjoy what you do. still lamenting the downfall of this fic. but it could have ended sooner. thank you for leaving this last, 80th chapter.

fucking hate people who destroy anothers motivation. as time went on, people seemed to have forgotten how criticism actually works. all they're doing is shitting on the negatives, pointing at the positives, and saying "that. do more that, do less bad that" and it's unjust bullshit. criticism is meant to me helpful, advice and to properly point out flaws WHILE handing out helpful advice to help development of said work. nowadays its just insulting work and telling you what to so better. i'm sorry you dealt with that. despicable. you're story is amazing. in a new writer way, you're learning your style, doing what you like. theres ropm to improve and to prosper at what you're proudly learning. undeserved hate. i like your style. its nice and its refreshing. it has flaws and those flaws can and will be fleshed out, and potentially even become your strengths. it's a freaking shame you're story had died. it was genuine on my eyes. i was excited to finish, And I was dreading the end. hoping i could prolong the inevitable. i was in utter dismay at the knowledge this was just going to be dropped like that. and because of the toxicity of others. dont quit a dream. i have no advice on dealing with toxic people. but i do believe you're going to write some very interesting literature. don't let yourself down, but dont worry about letting others down. your pace isnt theirs, their opinion isn't yours. you dont need to have an opinion on anything, nor do you need to accept one. take what you want, see what you want, please write what you want. thank you for the story. thank you.

OOOOOHHHHHHHHHH I JIST REALIZED WHAT THE MINION ROLES PLAYS! THAT ONE WEB COMIC WITH THE MUTE? I THINK? ASSISTANT WITH HER DOCTOR INDIVIDUAL SENPAI PEREIJ IDFK. THE ROLES, THESE ARE THE ROLES! OHHHH

I can definitely tell that you lost interest in writing this around chapter 70 or so. The entire tone and flow of the story seemed to grow stagnant around that chapter — all the way until the end here. It's a shame; it was a pretty good story up until that point. It was a bit heavy on the science/experimentation but not bad to read if you are interested in it.

My only real suggestion for your writing is to branch out your plot and add more depth. I liked how you focused so heavily on the life of your MC, but sometimes you need to have a few interlude chapters or something explaining what is going on in the background to set up plot points. This adds depth to your plot and helps bring all your plot points together and expand on them; in other words, it allows for multiple plot points.

You basically only had a single plot point throughout the entire story (experimenting or fighting); so it can come off as a bit bland. A few Madara, Zetsu, or Akatsuki interlude chapters would have gone a long way to set up the next major plot points/challenges and make the story much more interesting. Allowing the readers to see what is happening in the background and the kind of mess the MC will be encountering usually leads to greater immersion and suspense.

Also, you might want to get a bit more comfortable with writing a bit of Romance (there was a distinct LACK of it in this story). Even if you don't make it a major focus, a bit of Romance would add some much-needed depth to your character interactions and plot.

In this case (with his older mind and younger body), finding the perfect pairing would be pretty tricky unless he: threw away his morals and dated a younger girl, became abstinent until of legal age, or dated a creepy older woman. It would have been better to simply have someone like Isami or Rin crushing on him and leave it mostly unrequited from his side.

That would have added an extra depth and drama to all their interactions; allowing for moments of awkwardness, embarassment, or even jealousy. These little details tend to add a lot of depth to character interactions and allow for many different future plot points like 'saving the girl' or 'love rivals'. For example, if Kakashi or Obito got jealous of him when they noticed Rin had a crush on him or something!

Overall, it was a decent attempt to improve your writing. Definitely stay away from Webnovel if you want constructive criticism though.

Pretty lackluster choice for a summon...not that I disapprove. The comedic effect is nice I just feel like they will be kind of useless compared to the major summons. Snakes would have been a much better choice for Shiro imo.

I'm not gonna lie, the story has gotten extremely boring since the war ended. Almost nothing is happening and most of his 'experiemnts' are either fruitless, pointless, or just plain boring. The story has been very lackluster since around chapter 70.

I was hoping he would have the Tenseigan by the time of the Kyuubi incident (as you suggested in an earlier Author's Note); so he could save Kushina at least. Unfortunately, he's wasting his time altering farm animals, crops, and random academy students rather than enhancing himself further.

Is he seriously not going to retaliate against that no-name village? Or at LEAST the guy that read his mind? That seems extremely out of character. What if that guy wakes up and gains Shiro's knowledge of the 'plot' or something? That would be a disaster.

After seeing Orochimaru come to 'check on' him, I have the faint hope that Orochi will go and destroy that village in secret or something similar. It would be both amusing, totally in character with Orochi's pettiness, and even kind of cute in his own strange way.

Will he ever get laid; or will he stay a virgin forever?

Also, I hope he doesn't keep this permanent Flesh Clone very long. It is pretty disconcerting.

Did Shiro completely forget that he has the Lightning Cloak/Aura jutsu? Doesn't it make him faster, stronger, more durable, and give him better reflexes/reaction times? From what I remember, it was just a weaker version of the Raikage's Lightning Cloak; so why doesn't he ever use it?

Wasn't he just going to use the 5 Elements Seal or 4 Symbols Seal if he ran into Jinchuriki? He had the perfect chance to use them when he made his first surprise attack. Not that I dislike the all-out brawl, of course.

Aww, I kind of liked the mute girl. It's too bad she's kind of dumb.

I really dislike the whole forgetfulness cliche but I can't say it was unexpected.

Why would he let that woman go all of a sudden? That's completely out of character by this point.