|Reviews for Foiled|
| Aviantei chapter 1 . 7/9/2020
Greetings, Soror! Glad you could join us this T-Sauce session. Here’s to me getting some reviews done!
I’m not familiar with this series at all, but I am reminded of Howl’s Moving Castle. There’s this element of magic and whimsy with other bits of life tossed in, and that sounds like a recipe for success. Tho I keep reading “Chairman” as a title rather than a name...
I like this piece for its little moments of interaction and the descriptive details. Nicely done. Any chance we can see another one shot from you this summer?
| Punk Trash Noiz chapter 1 . 6/13/2020
I've never heard of this book before, but now I want to read it. I absolutely love stories about magic, and this world seems very fascinating. It's interesting to see how Charmain seems so comfortable in a house that is very confusing to everyone else. It sounds like even the other apprentice, Peter, struggles to find his way around. Charmain might not be good at most things, but it seems like she is a natural when it comes to magic.
It's amusing how concerned Mrs. Baker and Sempronia are regarding the fact that Charmain is apprenticed alongside a boy. This must be a society where such things are considered improper. I also love how Peter didn't hesitate to say negative things about Charmain to her family. He and Charmain are both very blunt, in contrast to Mrs. Baker and Sempronia, who act far more polite.
This was very well-written and enjoyable to read!
| Chronic Guardian chapter 1 . 6/11/2020
Well well! Good to see you posting, Sororina! And my goodness is your flow exemplary. You show a strong, dynamic grasp on character and conversational description here that paints a perfectly lovely portrait of the situation. What I REALLY like about this is how you effectively shadow events and personalities. You effortlessly integrate just enough details to get the situation across without ever feeling like you're throwing a wall of text at us.
...Well, okay, except for the last paragraph. That one gets a little chunky. It's still good, and certainly quite manageable, but I feel there should be a break somewhere in there. I would also say the ending is just shy of a strong punchline, but it's hard to complain when the rest is such a smooth, enjoyable ride. It may not be 100% perfect, but I would easily place it in the high nineties. Excellent work, Sororina!
| FullMentalPanic chapter 1 . 6/11/2020
Getting to point out all of Charmain's shortcomings sounds like it was very satisfying. This really was an entertaining read. You juggle the different speakers adeptly, and the tensions, connections, and inflections between them are shown excellently. I especially want to commend you for very clearly getting Peter's emotions across even without outright stating them in a lot of cases. Everyone in the book runs him down, but he's really the one keeping a lot of things running. That Aunt Sempronia was the whole driving force for getting Charmain to house sit is very amusing, because it means she largely instigated the whole plot of House of Many Ways. Really wonderful work with this, it's humorous, well-written, and bursting with characterization.