|Reviews for Project Rebirth|
| Ghostgirl8 chapter 36 . 10/24/2021
I just found your fic, I hate SYOTs but I fell in love with this story, your way of writing, every character... and I’m now going insane because I need to know what will happen next.
Please tell me we are getting baby Katniss!
| Henrietta77 chapter 1 . 5/6/2021
Amazing book and storyline; If you have some great stories like this one, you can publish it on Novel Star, just submit your story to hardy novelstar. top or joye novelstar. top
| critical-reader-for-fun chapter 36 . 8/14/2020
I hope you don’t mind, but I stumbled upon your story a few days ago and decided to give it a read. The concept in itself is a rather refreshing one for the community. Whilst not the most original, your added creative flairs have made it stand upon its own two legs. If you don’t mind, I’d like to leave a few comments and advice?
Firstly, I must commend you on the speed you wrote this story. 36 chapters in two months is rather stellar. Whilst the story is only 77k words and, on average, each chapter was a little over 2k words, it’s still a feat.
I will say that your writing does feel rather immature. I do not know your age or life experience, but in a few places, it reads like a bad TV show. You have a tendency to overuse commas in an attempt to not have run-on sentences, and whilst it works occasionally, it did make your writing feel choppy. The disruption of the flow at multiple sections made delving into the story sometimes hard and I found myself having to reread sections due to this error. Another hiccup would be that you overuse exclamation points. They should be used more sparingly in order to have more impact. This lends itself to my bad TV show comment — your tributes (not even in the arena) felt like they were shouting at each other in urgency all of the time.
You have a strong sense of imagery which makes for a nice read, but I do feel you only teetered on the edge. Writing in 3rd should allow you to dive into the deep end with creativity and make the scenes stand out and I feel like you barely scratched the surface on a lot of occasions, particularly in the fight scenes. The sense of urgency was lost and didn’t make it feel as intense as it could’ve done.
Writing twenty-four characters that are not your own is hard and I commend you for what you did with some of them, however as a whole, the majority of your cast lacked emotion and distinct characterization. I found myself having to make note of their names as many blurred into one with very little distinction. This meant only a few key players made an impact whilst the majority felt like fillers. It’s hard to complete — I would take more time to define each character as a whole. A switch-up in dialogue and actions would help make them feel different to each other.
A few characters in particular felt very one-note — lacking a lot of depth of growth. For a cast of tributes raised as siblings and then pitted against each other, I was expecting more raw emotion, turmoil and morally grey characters and I feel you missed the mark here. Your writing didn’t lend itself to the psychological depth I feel this story idea needed. A few instances it worked and certain characters, namely Ajax, it felt believable. However, the raw emotion still fell short and made the idea feel very lacklustre.
This in itself felt very hard to relate to them. Again, I completely understand that it’s hard to write characters that you did not create. However, I feel you could’ve layered a few of them more. Siblings fighting to the death should’ve had a sense of urgency as family vs. survival is very complex. I expected more morally grey moments, distress, betrayal and whilst you managed to do a fair amount of it, a lot of your tributes played fodder to the story without their own story being shown efficiently.
One particular and noticeable instance is Kitana. She’s one of the few I can name from the top of my head, so kudos on making her feel like a standout. However, I do believe she lacked any depth. Most of her dialogue read like a bad cartoon villain. Her actions lent themselves to the rather stereotypical psychopathic cliche. As the antagonist role, her appearances should’ve been intense and emotive, but often or not, her dialogue made her feel unrealistic and a caricature. This once more meant I struggled to connect with the tributes.
Your sentence structure surrounding dialogue is nice. I will say, though, that you write a lot of seemingly too over the top dialogue. Your choice of certain words and exclamation marks (again) meant that I felt like I was watching a bad Ryan Murphy TV show as opposed to reading about the emotional turmoil and angst that the tributes faced. Again, lending to my above comment — Kitana’s dialogue was more humorous than it was threatening. I suggest tweaking the flamboyant nature that you use in favour of humbling the teenagers with more emotion and less ‘big moment’ phrases.
I know you wrote this story rather quickly. A tremendous feat indeed that makes me wonder how you found the time! I do believe you do need to invest in more time editing your chapters. Your impressive update speed has meant that you missed the mark on a lot of crucial moments, leading to a lot of bland characters and easy-to-fix grammar mistakes that made the story feel immature, as I mentioned.
I would advise in slowing down the updates in favour of editing, planning and/or writing ahead. I know that your chapters are a lot shorter than most which allows the speed, but quality over quantity would mean a more soundly structured story that hit the nail on the head.
Again, you did a great job with what you could do and I can only commend you again on finishing the story. I just believe that your writing style did nothing for the idea and that perhaps, you needed more time to grow as a writer before taking on such a task.
| KILL COUNT chapter 35 . 8/11/2020
Valerian: 3 (Rudi, Carter, Sagar)
Darcy: 2 (Ruben, Valerian)
Synth: 2 (Delanie, Cupid)
Sagar: 2 (Rana, Napoleon)
Kitana: 2 (Ajax, Janet)
Cupid: 1 (Jupiter)
Delanie: 1 (Cortana)
Napoleon: 1 (Cerise)
Cortana: 1 (Kitana)
Vritra: 1 (Caio)
Elizabeth: 1 (Hadrian)
Arena: 5 (Elizabeth, Arturo, Vritra, Lily, Axton)
| Ripple chapter 35 . 8/11/2020
Finale Review Con't
Final Thoughts: Make no mistake, I do think this story is a MASTERPIECE and is easily some of best work and it’s probably one of my favorite syots of all time. This story was a blast for me to read and I enjoyed the ups and downs. I know that I get very passionate and I apologize if anything I said came off as mean. The point of some of the critiques I’ve leveled at you is not to make you think you’re a bad writer, because you’re not. You’re a BRILLIANT writer and I’m only being so tough on you because you’re so talented and I know that you can just keep getting better and better, but only if you address some flaws. As writers we all have a fuck ton of flaws in our writing. I do, we all do. None of us are perfect and I could do this same type of review to literally everyone on this site. I’m just doing it here because I consider you a friend and I respect you a great deal and I love your writing and I want to push you to keep getting better. It was only the amazing quality of this story that made me do all the long reviews I did, including this one. It’s all from a place of love and I hope you can understand that.
This syot is definitely one of the best this year and one of my favs of all time. I know this review seemed largely negative but that’s only because that’s easier to talk about. If I were to focus on every single great thing about this story, this review would be like 10k words and I really don’t have the time for that.
You’re an amazing writer and this is an amazing story. Don’t let anyone tell you different.
| Ripple237 chapter 36 . 8/11/2020
I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT SINCE THE START OF THIS STORY.
Ok so I loved checking in with Shelby. It was nice to see the consequences of such an emotionally challenging Games on both the Mentors as well as the victors. And they got their young bodies back! I bet that must feel weird af. Getting younger in a millisecond must be wild. And then Shelby got the call. Oh boy.
Bringing back Eden and making her a Resident Evil style body hopping full on Villain is EXACTLY the moves for her. It's the perfect direction to take her character and I'm actually LIVING for it. The sub plot just got so wild. AND DISTRICT 1 GOT BLOWN UP. This changes everything. Panem isn't gonna be the same after. Also a SECOND Project Rebirth? Holy shit. I'm not ready.
This was an amazing story and this final chapter perfectly sets up the next. I've said pretty much everything I wanted to to in my review of the finale, just know that I loved this story so much. It's been a ride.
Ripple237 signing off-
| Ripple237 chapter 35 . 8/11/2020
Ok. The Finale. It's been a long time coming but here we are. Since there aren't really individual POVS for the characters this time I'm just gonna go in order of my thoughts as I read the chapter.
I really like the condensed sword in the stone room for the final battle. Just a straight up sword slug fest. What I didn't expect was the rock paper scissors thing. Two one on one battles to determine the Victors, tournament style. I kinda dig it.
Ok so first battle was Darcy vs Valerian. Darcy got lucky tbh. Valerian was easily the weakest fighter in the final 4 so of course Darcy would beat her in combat. It was very predictable for Darcy to win but I'm not actually mad at it but I'll touch on that later.
Second fight was Cupid vs Synth, which broke my heart because these two were my two victor picks. And Synth predictably won. I mean based on the rankings, Synth and Darcy were the most skilled fighters left so this outcome made sense, despite it being very sad. I really wanted Cupid to win but I also wanted Synth to win. Ugh. Yikes. Anyways the thing that irked me about this last fight was that...Darcy and Cupid were shown throughout the story to get closer and closer as friends and wanted to win together. Are you really telling me that Darcy would just let Synth kill Cupid right in front of her like that? Just to hold up an agreement of rock paper scissors? Really Darcy? I lost a lot of respect for her because of this. I mean Darcy winning the first fight was perfect because then during Synth versus Cupid, all Darcy has to do is break the agreement and kill Synth while he was occupied with Cupid and boom, the gals go home together. The fact that Darcy didn't consider playing dirty like this when it's the finale and her friend's life was on the line made me lose incredible respect for her. Makes me think she didn't care about Cupid as much as she said she did. Anyways onto my final thoughts about the final 4.
Valerian: I really liked her for the majority of the story but things suddenly took a turn for the random. I ended up really disliking the direction her character went in. She was acting so ridiculously stupid to the point where it wasn't even realistic. And then she went all evil dark cartoon villain and it was not it for me. It was like character assassination of her. I'm really glad she died. I can't believe at one point I was actually considering her winning. She was a fun dark horse and had her character not taken that turn I think she would have been a good winner. Sagar deserved better than a friend like her.
Cupid: I'm really fucking sad. I knew this was the most likely result but it didn't stop me from being really really sad. I'm not gonna say she was robbed, but...she was maybe a little bit. Seeing her go from bloodbath to a big player in these Games was so satisfying. She used her people skills to get allies and keep people underestimating her despite her being actually very skilled. She was a real Cinderella story in this fairy tale and I'm really sad that she didn't get the happily ever after that she deserved. I loved her development and the exploration of her sexuality and her friendship with Darcy. She was proof of how a person who might be a bloodbath in one story could be a victor in another. It would have been so amazing for her to pull an upset and win. I was right though, and she was ultimately destined to lose after helping Darcy get her confidence back. And Darcy didn't even return the favor. Instead she adhered to the rules of the apparently sacred rock paper scissors deal. Don't get me wrong, I thought the rock paper scissors idea was really cool especially because it worked as a sort of call back to the childhood all these tributes spent together. I would have liked it more if the agreement was broken because that would have shown that they really don't care about the past and aren't kids anymore. Instead, Darcy decided to be honorable and let Cupid die. Out of all the times to be honorable, you really pick the time that means whether you survive with your friend or some other guy you barely know? All the respect I gained for Darcy in the past couple chapters was lost here. Despite my sadness at the way Cupid going out, I do agree that it seemed like Darcy was gonna be a better choice because that's the way the writing was heading. If Cupid was meant to win, her arc probably wouldn't have directly revolved around Darcy. I guess that's what makes me so sad. Cupid gave everything to Darcy just to have Darcy value a promise to her enemies over one she made to her friend. rip Cupid. You deserved so much better.
Darcy: She's been super up and down for me the whole story. I thought she a bland boring white girl for pretty much the whole story and it annoyed me how obvious it was that she was gonna make it to the end and probably win. And I was right, because she did win. In the last few chapters though, she did grow on me a bit. I appreciated her friendship with Cupid and the development of that relationship was by far the strongest element of the Games part of the story. So before this finale, I was actually ok with her winning no matter how disappointing and predictable it was gonna be. But now, I'm not mad, just annoyed at Darcy for throwing everything away in that moment. You got me invested in their friendship and then Darcy just let her die. It hurt me a lot, seeing Darcy just let Cupid die like that. The respect I gained for her quickly went away. I'm not even convinced that she was even Cupid's friend. I do agree with you, based on the direction of the story, that she was probably the best choice for a winner going forward, I just wish Darcy was more interesting and less predictable of a winner. I mean her win was hardly a surprise to anyone I think. And it's fine, if you're happy with her winning, then that's really all that matters. It's just hard because while I agree she was the best choice for the story going forward, she was just so bland and uninteresting compared to Cupid. Also I'm not gonna lie here. Darcy looks and acts very similar to both Moriah and Eden and it's just a lot of the same blonde white character type in the same story and that's why Darcy came off as bland compared to other characters like Cupid, Cortana, and Kitana. She was just similar to some of the recent subplot characters and it made it hard to connect with her. I found it especially hard to really connect or like Darcy which is why I've been harping on her the whole story, especially because I could easily see her path to the end. I do respect your decision to make her win though because I think it makes sense for the story, it's just... I just find her so bland. I'm glad you're happy with her winning though. And if was robbed the first time then you can consider the wrong righted, I'm just sad it had to come at the expense of Cupid. (It’s also hard to connect with a character who looks like they carry a semi-automatic rifle around a college campus while wearing a MAGA hat).
Synth: Speaking of people robbed in their OG story, here we have Synth! I'm so happy that he won. A very satisfying win overall for him. I felt like he was easily the smartest acting tribute in this Games and deserved to win because of that, especially because a lot of the tributes this Games were being incredibly stupid. I'm glad Synth has the victory he deserved and I'm interested to see what sort of things he gets into afterward. I'm also curious to see how he's gonna deal with the things he did in this Games as he goes home and has to cope with what he did. I'm very glad he won. Congrats dude, you deserved it for sure.
This was an amazing story. I agree with you 100% that is by far the best story you’ve ever written. I was thoroughly invested throughout the entire story and I was very passionate in my reviews lol. I’m sorry if they ever came off as mean because that was never my intention. I just wanted to be honest about my feelings and wanted to point things out that might help you in the future because you’re an amazing writer and this story was proof that, but I know that you can be even better, just like how we all are constantly working to improve our writing. This site is great for fun, but the great side affect is that we get to help other improve our writing ability for the publishing sector if we ever want to head in that direction.
That being said, I’m gonna do the same thing I did for WTP where I go over all the things I LOVED and some of things that I didn’t. This all comes from a place of love, I promise.
PreGames: This was easily the BEST pre-Games I have ever read in a syot. Nothing even really comes close. Binging the intro chapters and the pre games stuff was some of the most fun I’ve had reading a syot. It felt like I was watching a really amazing Netflix show. I loved how you jumped around in time with all the characters. It was really clever and it worked wonders to introduce all the characters. The switch to third-person suits you. Your writing is already so much more sophisticated and engaging and I felt like I got to know the characters much better as result. Plus, the way you incorporated plot stuff in the intros and the Pre-Games was so clever and it worked every single time. I was deeply engaged and incredibly impressed. The Pre-Games was also helped by the story’s Premise but I’ll get there in a second.
The Premise: This story had probably one of the most unique premises I’ve ever seen in a syot. It was something new and exciting. Usually All-star syots tend to be messy popularity contests but the premise for this was honestly genius. It worked SO WELL and it was so unique and engaging. I’m still blown away by it conceptually and I’m so glad I got to read this story. The sci-fi elements added a lot to this story to great effect. Sci-fi has always gone hand in hand with the Hunger Games seeing it being used in this was honestly so amazing. I doubt I’ll see a syot in the future with a premise this unique. The idea of the mentors and Houses and the whole chip thing was so smart and brilliant for plot and character work. It was a unique spin on the Hunger Games and all-star Games that was executed to PERFECTION.
Arena/Setting: Caleb this Arena, the storybook…it’s FUCKING GENIUS. The pages turning and the unique environments were awesome. It was a super creative idea and I’m glad it was in this story. So we started with the tree house jungle arena. The tree houses were cool but I felt like there wasn’t too much going on here. It was a little bland compared to the latter arenas but I think it was actually good to start off that way because it gave us a false sense of security. Then we moved on to beach and castle. I liked this one a lot. The visuals of this arena when the page turned were so cool. The castle was whimsical and fun but I sorta wish we spent some more time outside of it. The third arena was by far the best. The descriptions and mutts in this one were amazing. It also gave us some great set pieces to use in great creative deaths (Arturo, Kitana, Vritra) and I really loved it. It was def my favorite of the three. Then the finale was the sword in the stone slug fest which I thought was a great idea too because we would be crowning the kings and queens. It was an amazing arena. If anything, I wish the Games were longer so we could have gotten more arenas because they were all so cool lol. You’ve improved so much in setting description from blood grants and I’m forward to the next story and its arena as a result. Seriously great stuff.
The Games: Ok so the Games themselves had a lot of great moments but also a lot of not so great moments. Things started off really strong with the Bloodbath and Day 1. The build-up to the BB and the Games was immaculate and the BB had some shocking but also expected moments which made it a perfect blend. The standout moment was definitely Cupid getting revenge on Jupiter from Recrudesce and it was honestly one of my favorite moments of the story. The Kitana vs Janet rematch was also really fun and the unexpected result of Janet dying again. The rest of Day 1 and Day 2 was also really great. Seeing the tributes interact and make plans was so fun. Your use of dialogue to have the characters develop was particularly good. It was just as good as pre-Games and made excited for nearly all of the characters in the story. The latter half of Day 2 was really disappointing, especially because of the way Elizabeth was killed. I know she wasn’t my character but as I reader I feel that it is my job to try to feel connected and invested to as many characters as possible so I was a little upset when her character was introduced one chapter and thrown away in a last minute stinger at the end of the second chapter. Moments like this sort of put a bit of dash on the Games, and it just stood out like a sore thumb because how good everything else. I would be careful for these sort of abrupt character deaths going forward. Then we moved onto Day 3, which I liked a lot. There were a lot of great character things set in motion here. Kitana’s death was really great and the use of the arena to make that happen was fun to read. I do think that at this point in the story, some of the characters start acting really stupid to the point where it’s unrealistic and it’s hard to find a train of thought that makes it make sense for the characters to act that way. I’ll touch on that more later. The feast was a very fun chapter and Synth leaving Vritra for dead was great the twins sacrificing themselves was really great too. I hope we get to see the effects of that in the sequel. From this point on, some of the characters shot up in my rankings because of their development and some went down because they weren’t even acting like real people anymore. Once again, I’ll touch on that later. So basically we move into the finale. I loved the incorporation of the rock paper scissors game but I think that it could have been executed better to make it seem more realistic. I’ve already mentioned that it seemed crazy that Darcy would just let her friend die like that when she could have easily killed synth when he was fighting cupid, unless your intention was to have Darcy let cupid die like that. So the Games started off really strong but started to decrease in quality as they went on. Don’t get me wrong, they were still amazing because this whole story is amazing, it just wasn’t as good relative to the other stuff in this story. It did sort of a feel like a rush to the end in the last couple chapters and I understand that you wanted to get done and were excited to finish but it resulted in content that wasn’t as good as the rest of the story.
Character Development: The character development in this story had some amazing moments but also some moments that didn’t make a lot of sense. I do think that you did a great job with pretty much all the characters in this story. There were a few that started off as one note and stayed that way until they died but that’s unavoidable when trying to write for 24 separate characters. There were also some characters that started off really strong but decreased into caricature, namely Valerian and Napoleon. Both of these two characters started off as great characters with complex personalities and they stayed that way for the majority of the story and it was great. Around the feast though, it was like these two became new characters. The careful planning of Napoleon became a bunch of insanely stupid decisions and Valerian went from complex to a cringey TV villain just like that. There was much more great character work than not though. For example, the way you developed Cupid and Darcy during the Games was really excellent. I never liked Darcy but her friendship with cupid was set up and developed so well that Darcy just naturally grew on me. I think it was a great moment of female friendship. Also shout-out to Carter and Arturo. The way you wrote them as friends and how they dealt with their anxiety was nuanced, emotional, and realistic. Overall, the character work was such an AMAZING improvement over Blood Grants that it makes me excited for your next story.
Things to watch out for: I did this section for Linds so I’m gonna do it for you too. This is not to bash you or hurt feelings, I just wanted to point some things out that might help you going forward with your next story.
I mentioned this already, but watch out for doing abrupt deaths of characters that come out of no where with no build. Namely I’m thinking of Hadrian and Elizabeth who died in back to back chapters each tacked onto the end of the chapter with a tiny POV. First off, a tiny POV like that, especially at the end of a chapter is a dead giveaway that the character is dying. It’s also a bit unsatisfying because it noticeably sticks out compared to some of the other clearly planned out and set up deaths like Cortana, Kitana, and Janet. So I would try to avoid just throwing in these sort of POVs just to get rid of someone because that’s what it feels like, that you just wanted to get rid of them at the last minute when you were writing.
Another thing that I noticed while reading because I like to really get into the story was the lack of logic in some characters actions, especially during the Games portion of the story. Characters were making stupid decisions that seemed unrealistic and usually would lead to their deaths. For example, Napoleon saved the bad bitches alliance from Kitana multiple for seemingly no reason. At first I thought it was because of a side alliance with Darcy but that ended up not going anywhere. It was especially frustrating when Kitana wanted to go after Cortana and Delanie on the steps and he just dipped. Why on Earth would he just leave at that moment. It was clear that both he and Kitana were very skilled and it made no sense to me that he would just rather not fight and engage. I mean the whole point of the Hunger Games is kill or be killed and Napoleon eventually got killed. The other character that acted infuriately stupid was Valerian. I get that she was emotional over Sagar “dying” but not hearing the cannon and not seeing his face in the sky and she still wanted to off and leave him to team up with Delanie? It just didn’t make any sense. There were a couple other moments of that too, like at the finale when Darcy let Cupid die instead of playing dirty and quickly racing in to skill Synth. I would look out for creating more believable circumstances so you can make the characters do what you want them to do without it seeming like they suddenly having cognitive abilities. Logical circumstances are a huge part of Hunger Games stuff.
Lastly, I just wanted to warn about rushing to the finish line. Your update schedule in this story was inhuman and I applaud you for having the talent and motivation to achieve this, but towards the end of the story it was very apparent that you started to rush through things. Characters stopped making sense, plot lines were fuzzy and confusing, and people were dying every chapter. I totally get being excited when writing and wanting to just blast off and do a bunch of writing and that’s fine, you just have to be aware that you might rush through things and as a result have the last couple chapters not be as good the rest of the story. That’s not to say the last couple chapters weren’t good, they were still some AMAZING writing, but it was very clear that you were rushing through it. I’m a painfully slow writer so your process is alien to me but I know there’s a way for you to be able to write as fast as you do in the end of a story and still keep the chapters as high of a quality of the first three quarters of the story.
Final Thoughts: Make no mistake, I do think this story is a MASTERPIECE and is easily some of best work and it’s probably one of my favorite syots of all time. This story was a blast for me to rea
| AuroraMiri25 chapter 36 . 8/11/2020
OH wow Eden is crazy. Holy guacamole. Well I'm super excited to read the sequel! I currently have no Tribute inspiration but I really wanna submit so I'm hoping I can find an idea lool. Have a great day :) And congratulations on another SYOT well done.
| AuroraMiri25 chapter 35 . 8/11/2020
Oh gosh, Cupid. I was positive she would win, let me tell you. And Darcy has never been a favorite of mine. But I can live with it because Synth one and that makes me happy. This story was a beautiful masterpiece. You're seriously unbelievable. Keep writing :)
| AuroraMiri25 chapter 34 . 8/11/2020
Awww, Sagar. And Val. And Delaine. My emotions are everywhere. And did you say sequel? Maybe I can actually submit to this one hahaha. But Delaine, much as I resented her towards the end, was a lovely read. I'm still super torn about Val but we shall see in the finale! Eeee, the anticipation.
| AuroraMiri25 chapter 33 . 8/11/2020
AHH! Noooooo. Not my Carter! Ugggh Val I love you but NOT RIGHT NOW. I mean he had to die eventually but I wasn't ready for it to be Val and Delaine that killed him. They're literally insane.
Cupid! She's winning. She can't not win. I know I said I wanted Val to win but she killed Carter and that's unforgivable. I mean I get it? But I love Cupid and I need her to be happy at all costs.
Noooo. Leon was such a joy to read and one of my favorite tributes. I'll miss him but if it means Sagar and Val can be reunited maybe it's worth it.
VAL nO YOU LITTLE CHICKEN NUGGET. Leon's death isn't worth it if she's just gonna up and kill Sagar. But I'll restrain myself for everyone's sake.
| AuroraMiri25 chapter 32 . 8/11/2020
OKAY. That was fun. But NoT lol. I was so sad to see Vi go. I'm picky about my Careers but I liked her. And I liked Synth more.
Not the twins! Stupid Capitol! Lily's too sweet to die! Ugggh.
Okay, so we still have some unfinished business between Leon and Sagar, which is making me nervous. In the long run, I like Leon waaay more than Sagar so I'm hoping he wins. BUT. If Sagar lives Val will be happy. So it's kinda complicated.
Oh my gosh, Delaine's a savage! You know, I loved Delaine and Cortana equally. Until the last chapter. Still, a tiny part of me was still hoping she'd make a comeback since she killed Kitana and all. But Delaine and Val are a match made in heaven. I... I have no idea who I want to win at this point lol. Decisions, decisions.
| AuroraMiri25 chapter 31 . 8/11/2020
Be my guest! Deepest pride and greatest pleasure! HA! Also I totally guessed the moving furniture, that's an amazing idea by the way. I love Val. But I love so many others too, it's heartbreaking.
Ouch, Madame Wardrobe's gone rogue. I feel like she has a name but I don't remember it lool. Arturo... it was sad to see him go. But I'm seriously glad Carter survived. phew.
Kitana's dead? Just like that. Woah. Also GO LEON! I love him too! Ugggh I do think Cortana sucks for doing that to Delaine. Fake friend! But not everyone is a hero. It takes a lot of bravery and love for someone else to give up your life for them, I guess. But she's dead! It feels pretty surreal at this point.
A feast! And that's such a good twist, you're a genius! Teach me your waysss. Actually I don't write SYOTs so... But still! Hmmm, what's Vi's plan? Exciting.
| TitanMaddix chapter 35 . 8/11/2020
I do enjoy what you do here, leaving the victors concealed until the very end. I'm sure it gave everyone in the final four big anxiety you sneaky little dude you. With that being said, thank you for bringing Darcy home as the winner on her second outing. You know I don't get super invested in my characters, because it's just fanfiction but also we're literally making these characters to die. But I'm happy you saw what I did in Darcy, and I'm happy to have had the opportunity to resubmit her. I think the two story arc she's been through is incredible. Going from a selfish, horrible human being who thought she was good to someone who genuinely cared about others was pretty groovy to read. Anyway as for the others in this chapter, I never connected much with Valerian though I see why she was here. I think it would have been super cute to see a DacryxCupid win, however Synth was an incredible character. I was a little late to the party, but it's been fun interacting with all of you, and just gotta say it's been fun. Thanks for the story Caleb, can't wait for the next one.
| Axe Smelling God chapter 36 . 8/11/2020
This was a great way to end the story and I’m excited to see where you take the sequel and now I’m getting excited to submit again.