Reviews for To Coda
darthnell chapter 53 . 6/1/2021
A h h Hoseaaa.. ;_; God that reunion with his mother was so heartbreakingl t.. Like Hooh man I barely remember her from the intros but that shit still Hits, I don't know how you do it.. Actually, maybe it was the "He did that to her. He forced her to watch him /die/." Also Galvin!1 ;_; They're hesitant a h.. But the hugs.. the hugs are so good.. I love that it literally took like a minute max for Hosea to decide that it was all worth it then. (Gay of you, Hosea hjfdhfdjh)

a.. Lmaooo I forgot that she'd hate Milo whoops.. Ig I was too wrapped up in my Micalo vibes ;-; Ooh curious!Velcra ! Vengeful!Velcra ehehe.. I'm glad she's lookin for answers bc. I want them too :0 Lmaoo Velcra holding back on going after Ilaria bc she knows there'll be repercussions.. yeah Don't. Ooh yes Ria and her tablet would be a good place to start.. Girl needs some got damn Internet hjfdhjfd. "Before anything else, Velcra Leight is an /asset/." I love that.. It's true, that's why people allied with her in the first place. Might as well use her while they have her... She's definitely someone you'd rather have on your side than not, if you can. Though I can also see why Velcra learning more about a dangerous terrorist group would be a Problem hjfhjf.

Velesss yess give me the Rat.. I want the Rat Family Drama.. Lmaoo imagine Veles mourning his dad. Sounds fake. Aw a Singular sibling is happy he's back.. Well, one is better than none, kid. Oh no, drunkie in the house.. Ope and here it comes oof.. Man they all just fucking hate each other hjfdhjfd.. Unfortunately for Veles, all his recent trauma was on live tv, there's no way they won't use that against him. And oof, that comment about how his father's thoughts will keep Veles up at night but not Sylvanus.. rip. Also Sylvanus, stfu about Varrik, you're nothing compared to him smh. For that alone, I hope Veles psycho chainsaw-murders you c: Things can simply only get Worse from here :D

Oooh Ilaria is also keen on learning more.. on Doing Something.. Hey Ilaria, boy do I have the buddy for you ! :) Man I do wonder whether she'd be determined enough for work through this that she'd be willing to work with Velcra once again.. That would certainly be Something hjfhjfd. LMAO Cal straight up not giving a shit, I love that for him. He's just like, "Not my problem" and boom done. Good for him. Man imagine it being completely up to Velcra and Ilaria to solve this hfhjd.. Like Cal's got a good point that you can't really trust the government to punish the right person for the crime oof. Hopefully they'd at least have a head start on figuring it out.. Then detectives Velcra and Ilaria can step in jhfdhjfd.

O h shit Ambrose getting his surgery ahhhh.. Awe poor Oksana is Stressin.. Of course she is ;-; She wouldn't be Oksana if she weren't. Ahh that comparison to Konstantin, oof.. ;-; And Micah omg, of course he's here too, bless ;-; "He held her together long enough that she would be a terrible friend if she didn't do the same." A h they're just. So good I love them.. They both need So much sleep though hfdjhfd. O h Ambrose is okay, god bless.. He gets his voice back ! :D I assume.. ;-; I hope it'll be the same but. You never know.. Aw now Oksana can finally allow herself to rest, bless.. ;-; Dman, that's still Many updates but also. Idk if I'm ready for TC to end bro ;-;
ladyqueerfoot chapter 53 . 6/1/2021
! chapter! !

HOSEA AND GALVIN like... MY HEART? god this is almost as wholesome as inara last chapter i am living god this is so wholesome

AND THEN MY GIRL VELCRA LEIGHT COMES OUT HERE AND DOES HOT GIRL SHIT SHIT! GAHH AS SHE SHOULD SHE IS MY BABEEEE ! anyways... she fucking ate that she is nancy drew she will solve the crimes ugh bestie velcra i fucking love u u are kicking sm ass u will solve this shit i believe in u prove everyone wrong CMON REDEMPTION ARC! ughhh VYUEDGYUWGY VBAROKKKHIUDWQGIUEF

...and i actually felt bad for veles today. fitting bc its his bday ig but damn his brother can eat shit gah i hated that ugh i don't like veles but this was sad asf

ilaria too she makes me very sad i hope she can solve this shit too if velcra cant i hope she can like do victor things and get to the bottom of this i feel so bad she is like a lost puppy out here she is so sad i am sad bye

and then ofc we have oksana and she is delightful gah her and milo are just too fucking soft i cannot even they have my whole ass heart okay? i fucking... im love them so much

that is it! thanks for writing and i hope u enjoy ur sushi
darthnell chapter 52 . 5/31/2021
O o h Casiii ! ;-; Omg and Hale.. A h Hale of course he's leaving.. He really should be gettin home ;-; ..I hope he Makes it home though ahh :'0 Waiiit stop they're so soft.. ;-; Also on man they really went all hush-hush about this if Hale didn't know he was leaving until an hour before oof. I love that Casi is still all rough around the edges with teasing him and all but its like. Friendly familiarity still.. ;-; I really do hope they see each other again after this whole affair.. And god fucking. Dammit, that hug was so goddamn precious and Good ;-; I just. Adore their friendship very much ;_;

Lmao Oriol.. Can't blame the kid for wanting to know Everything about who's going.. Like me too bitch ! Fhjfhjd. A h Hoseaaa ;-; Pfft Oriol's lowkey right when he says no one else would've said goodbye, oof.. ;-; Also "tucked under someone's arm, Oriol manages to make himself feel better." A H ;-; Kid just simply wants to be Hugged, ouch.. Aw him practically Forcing himself not to lie.. I love that for him ;-; He's Growing! Also lowkey I love that this whole experience and all its horrors was better for him than if he stayed at home.. Like it's so messed up but it's Good.

O h bless Inara actually made it to Five ohhh thank god.. Nobody blew up the hovercraft (yet) hfdh.. Well if anyone needed to make it back home the most, Inara was definitely one of them ;-; Also the way she's hiding and keeping her head down like nothing ever happened, oof.. O h her stalling oof.. Man, I hope she ends up talking all the kids, like imagine if there's fucking. Only one of them left at the house bc they didn't jump out oof.. hjffhd. That was such a lovely reunion though a h.. Inara and her little ducklings C': They're so good and Precious ;-; And they're finally out of that shithole, god bless ;-;

Ooh Rex.. Did he only tell her about the situation with his dad and not the people he murdered? Ope.. I mean like.. Fair but also oof. He's such a sad kid though, like.. Shoah is p much the only person he Has right now (I mean, he'd probably have Ren if he could forgive him). Also his dad literally wanting him dead, ouch.. He is just so tragically unloved ;-; Also that bit at the end there, of him not feeling his fun little murder urges anymore because maybe he doesn't need them.. Like I don't know jack shit about psychology or anything but. The idea that perhaps it developed as a self defense mechanism or something is super interesting ;-;

Oh Milo, back in the hospital. Kind of like his new home, rip fdhjfd. A h of course it's Micah who's chilling there ;_; I can practically feel him vibrating with worry jhhjfdh. And of course Milo is like "Let's fucking gooooooo-" Like buddy, Where? Fhfd. You are simply not going anywhere right now. Also Micah just being so Familiar around him ; - ; I love it very much. I am Soft. Fhjdjhdhjdf Milo literally bluescreening at the thought of Micah hugging him byee.. It's maybe not funny but also it Is jhfdhjfd. I love how that's the best threat Micah has to offer ;-; It's v fitting for him ;-; Wow I simply love these lads.. A h the part about Milo's parents.. ;-; It's v good 3 And the epilogue omg.. :eyes: I love Screaming
ladyqueerfoot chapter 52 . 5/31/2021

and um... shoot milo be gay as fuck

inara makes me sad... oriol and her drama is mid tier at best

casi is still gay why did i do this review out of order probs bc i read it already anyways casi tella halecassi friendship owo

velcra when
Remus98 chapter 51 . 5/28/2021
Apocalypse :eyes:

Donatella: whilst their relationship certainly has a sweet side, these are some reckless girls. I understand the desire to go out and look for the people you love (as I’ve said before, I’d probably do the same in their position) but stay in the safety of that building damnit. Of course they wouldn’t. Of course they would risk it all for the person that killed them both. Ugh, sometimes I wonder if Mari is the smart one after all lmao.

Ambrose: there’s some very interesting commentary with him, about one’s biggest dreams not always being what they seem. He wanted nothing more than to have his face plastered on those billboards, and now that he does it’s not all he hoped it would be. Some of that comes with the loss of his voice, of course, but a very realistic and intriguing view on aspirations nonetheless. Still want him to be happy tho, he deserves it.

Licia: my favorite fighter’s duo, trying to not be emo despite being the most emo of them all. That might not be fully accurate, but their repressed feelings certainly don’t things better for them when handling a situation like this. Still, it’s sweet how they can recognize each other’s cracks, and try to be there for each other even if they don’t know how to. Licia better get back to her brothers at some point. She f-ing needs to!

Marigold: group hug! I wish Ren joined in - it’s a shame that he’s such a good person, because I would have loved for him to stay just a little while longer. A pure Maren moment, alone, would have sufficed, but I guess Mari isn’t the only person he cares about. I know they mention they spend a lot of time together off-page, but I’m desperate to see some of it on-page as well. Idk, maybe I’m being greedy, but what else is new?

Mazzen: going home via flying, eh? I’m happy that it’s Mazzen going and now the Nines, because that means it’s Mazzen who dies if they get ambushed. Asdfghjkl, did I ever mention that I’m a horrible person? A biased horrible person at that. I wonder who the high-priority people include, though. Are there people who deserve to go home more than others? I’m curious to find out what next chapter will hold.

I’m caught up!
Remus98 chapter 50 . 5/27/2021
I’m Fear.

Pandora: as I have been a fool and not read anything in this universe since FOB, it was very interesting learning some more about her and her family. Hidden brother? That’s cool. Soran was in another of the stories no? I’m very intrigued. And scared. Something is about to GO DOWN.

Penelope: it’s cute that they’re all allowed to come and say goodbye to the others even if they’re not going themselves. Still, the fact that so many people are there, which was only emphasized by that last line, makes me worried. It’s very subtle, but I feel like you’re hinting at something, and that something will probably be horrendous. They’ve already been through so much, these kids. Please do not kill them one more time. Pls!

Micah: and there we have it - the other shoe finally dropped. I’m not going to say I’m surprised, per se, but I’m definitely disturbed. An explosion? Really? Who wants these kids dead and why. This is supposed to be the end of all this killing shit. Anyway, it’s good Milo was there to save him (there were some really cute lines about how he took all of the brunt to save Micah, awh) and he better not bleed out. I swear to god.

Hale: look at him saving everyone and their mother. Hale truly is too good for all of this, isn’t he? Might be weird hearing this from me since I’ve never been the biggest fan (still not if I’m being perfectly honest) but I have mad respect for this guy nonetheless. I’m glad he saved Milo too, who I like all of a sudden for some unknown reason that I will never wrap my mind around. My character arc is truly superb, don’t you think?

Devan: thank the lord nobody died. But if somebody did, I’m going to agree with Devan and say that I would hope it was Veles. Well, Veles /or/ Velcra. Heck, why not both? Anyway, it’s glad that Varrik has Devan, I think she tempers him in a lot of ways, and she obviously held her back from doing something he was going to regret. Boy needs to calm down, but I would have probably acted the same in that situation so…

Cambria: get that revenge, I support it!

Still fear.
Remus98 chapter 49 . 5/27/2021
Chug, chug, chugging along.

Casimira: waking up by each other’s side :plead: that was so cute. I like the idea of them spending the rest of their lives together, or at least a substantial part of it. I can’t really see them ever being apart, because of the things they’ve gone through together, even if they don’t love each other in the way they do now. But who am I kidding, Casitella will always triumph, fight me. And going home tomorrow? THAT’S SO SOON!

Lisse: it surprises me too, how close she has gotten to Penny. I think most of us thought she would remain in cahoots with Mari seeing as they’re so similar, but it makes sense that two of the people who’re choosing to not go home stay together instead. The whole thing about her being adopted, and them vising Nine together, is just so precious. I want it so badly! This is getting too cute, waiting for the second shoe to drop.

Ilaria: this might well be my favorite conversation between the Sixes. It’s not a very happy one, but I like getting to know more about Ilaria’s backstory, and seeing just how supportive Cal is (in his own way). Also very interesting that both of them choose to go home even though neither seems to have any particular affinity for where they’re from. But Ilaria probably wants to get back to Ceto, which could be a fun reunion.

Ren: he really is too good for this world. He does so much for people, settling for a simple smile in return even though he deserves so much more. I lowkey wish that Mazzen would thank him in a more explicit way, but I understand why their dynamics are the way they are, and the train has not yet left the station. I’m glad for Mazzen, though, that he will have someone in Three that can help him ease back into life. That’s very good.

Alexa: well this is a curious development. There has been so much build-up to an actual conversation, Lex batting him away even though they seem to have been in each other’s presence every day, that I didn’t know what the result would be when it happened. I certainly hadn’t expected this. Maybe there is a future for them after all, if reluctant friends if nothing else. Maybe some time apart is what they need to finally reconcile.

Oksana: sadness! I absolutely hate the thought of Oksana going back to One alone. I know Ambrose wants her to forget about all of this, but can’t she stay with him until he’s ready to go back as well? I resonate with her mindset of home being with people and not a place, and getting on that train alone goes against everything she’s gotten out of coming to the Capitol in the first place. I hope some plans change before tomorrow.

Not ready for the insanity of phase two
District11-Olive chapter 38 . 5/26/2021
I'm only like 6 months late but hey fuck you for this even though I know it's okay
Remus98 chapter 48 . 5/26/2021
We love us some unity.

Milo: I guess he knows what’s it like to drink alone now. I feel like I say this about a lot of people, but it bares repeating - I’m glad there are people there for him. I’ve talked about his relationship with both Tella and Micah today, but I think they’re both very good for him, as I’ve also said in the past. What more can I say? Maybe don’t try to hurt yourself, even if it’s tempting, b/c that will make me sad and you don’t want that.

Callister: he’s adorable. I find it funny that you don’t want Dyl and I to thirst over him, but the you describe him being sweaty as he works out and having bloody knuckles and all around being a hot stud. You’re bringing this onto yourself, Momo. I said what I said. Anyway, I’m intrigued to see this session with Ambrose, if thats a seen we get to take part of. That’s definitely an interesting form of bringing about an apology. I like it!

Veles: homecoming! I expected that this would come rather soon, and it doesn’t surprise me one bit that the Capitol wants to put on a show of unity. Announcing it to the public is a nice way of bringing attention to this being the end of the Hunger Games for good, but seeing as people have been freaking out recently I’m assuming everything doesn’t go to plan. Also, Veles saying he has no bad sides? Ugh, keep dreaming, boy.

Inara: oop, it’s happening. This is another one of those reunions I’ve been waiting for, and I’m glad it was one of the warmest receptions we’ve received so far. I’m kinda in agreement with Hosea though - this could have happened so much sooner. It’s not like Inara did anything wrong, Micah asked her to kill him, she she obviously had some demons she had to deal with. I’m glad to see their dynamics are still excellent.

Oriol: wow, two reunions back-to-back? This was not quite as comforting as Inara’s conversation with Micah, but no less impactful. I think the honesty works well for them, and so does the fact that this is not the start of a friendship but rather a way to talk through what happened. They will most likely not communicate after this, and that might be for the better. That part felt very realistic, which made so very intriguing.

Mazzen: sad! He’s going through all of the feels, and it’s not turning out as well as I had hoped. Ren being there is a relief, because I don’t want to think about what would have happened if he wasn’t, but I’m scared of where those dark thoughts will take him when he’s on his own. He’s not going to have someone holding his hand through this forever. Hopefully he will find a sliver of peace before he leaves on that train.

Halfway! Look at me go.
Remus98 chapter 47 . 5/26/2021
Slow and steady wins the race.

Micah: they’re so valid. Remember back in the day, aka the later stages of the arena, when I used to hate Milo? He’s still a wildcard whom I wouldn’t trust with my own life, but his relationship with Micah is sweet. The image of them holding hands in that bathroom… MY HEART. I’m probably alone in this opinion, but I wouldn’t say no to a a Mico/Milah love story right about now. No? Whatever. As long as they stay together.

Marigold: awh, I’m so proud of my girl. She has never been one for grudges, but forgiving Ilaria for attributing to her death (even if it was to lessen the pain of it) is certainly a big step. It’s like watching her grow up right before my eyes, and it couldn’t be a happier sight to witness. Like I said with Penny last chapter, it’s so interesting seeing you peel back some of the layers. Her journey has been an important one, and I’ve loved it.

Varrik: he’s asking for trouble, isn’t he? I understand that he wants to make things right with Lex (it’s quite endearing I have to admit) but nothing will get better by forcing himself onto her. She obviously needs space, and he needs to realize that things won’t get better unless she comes to him first. That’s not to say I’m not rooting for their happy ever after. I want nothing more than Varexa, I just don’t know if it’s realistic.

Hale: I didn’t realize that Casi hadn’t gotten further in her recovery, but it makes sense considering how recently she woke up. I’m glad, for her sake, that she’s got the two people she trust more with her. They’re not going to make the physical part any easier, but they can hopefully lessen the mental strain considerably. Knowing Casi, though, she won’t let them know that they’re saving her from succumbing. This is a lovely mess.

Velcra: that certainly went south. Idk if I expected these two to have an actual interaction, I couldn’t quite believe it when it actually happened, but I’m not mad that it happened. It was probably for the better? When it comes to them I honestly don’t know how to feel about anything. I think Velcra should just do a favor and stay out of everyone’s way. Though, it was interesting hearing about her thoughts on betrayal.

Rex: the potential danger he could face by going home has never really phased me before. I was so busy thinking about the pain /he/ could inflict that I didn’t stop to think that his father is even more dangerous than he is. Life in Five is probably not a good idea for him, but where else could he go? He’s not going to go live with Ren, and he hasn’t really made any other friends he can establish a living situation with. Very sad.

I’m getting there, congrats on 300k!
Remus98 chapter 46 . 5/26/2021
I’m back back back again.

Ambrose: this voice thing continues to be super painful, for him and for me. The prospect of him figuring out his identity without singing, whilst interesting in theory, is pushing him in such a downward spiral that I don’t really know how he could fully recover. I guess it’s a good commentary on winning/surviving the games not meaning you get everything you want, but it still sucks. That operation better work damnit.

Hosea: look at him making amends. I’ll give it to him - he knows what needs to be done, and he makes sure to perform to the best of his ability. I think a lot of people would be scared of standing before someone you’ve ‘wronged’ and let it all hang out, but he’s jumping in head first. He’ll be stronger because of it. Good on him. Going down to meet with Licia is a scary thot, but like everything he does, probably for the better.

Licia: very sweet. I know it took a lot out of her to be nice to Micah (as nice as Licia can be lmao) so I’m proud of her for putting in the effort. There’s something endearing to me about how she goes about things, and how she interacts with Cal/Ilaria. They obviously care a lot about each other, but none of them is particularly emotive so it mostly ends up being silent communication. It’s cute. I kinda love it for them.

Devan: as much as I love her sassy attitude, I would like for her and Ambrose to reforge their friendship one day. I realize that it will most likely not happen, and I understand why someone would want to stay away from their killer, but let a boy dream. Anyway, I’m glad she went to have a chat with Shoah. I don’t even care what she says, she needs to air her feelings even if she refuses to feel them. Ugh, why is this so painful.

Penelope: ok, Vance is now my favorite character. Penny is growing a lot on me as well - it’s not that I’ve ever disliked her, but I appreciate seeing this more personal side to her. She has a lot of depth, beneath her quirky persona, and it was nice getting an in-depth look at some of her insecurities. Nice maybe isn’t the best word, but certainly interesting. I now feel more connected and I appreciate that in my own weird way :)

Donatella: the Twos’ at it again. Their relationship continues to intrigue me, and Tella’s feelings for Milo even more so. She obviously feels some sort of kinship to him, despite him having killed both Casi and herself. It would be easy to assume district loyalty, but it’s went beyond that point by now. She sees something she can relate to in him, I just can’t put my finger on exactly what it is. I’ll continue to be a clown I suppose.

Let’s read some more.
Josephm611 chapter 51 . 5/25/2021
everything freaks me out and i am scared but i must read because that is the only thing that will give me answers so hereeeee we go!

oh my goodness i'm so glad they're fine, and hale got milo! but micah and oksana are still searching and AHHHH what about everyone else? please tell me they're ok? i love how the moment something like this happens, most of them are searching for each other now, like they're all attached now, even casi to milo, and that bond is sweet to see, even if it's against a backdrop of chaos

yes! the bonds that formed over the past ten or so chapters are being tested by calamity, and i'd say that they've been proven to be fully solid. poor ambrose. i hadn't thought of how terrible this would be for his damaged respiratory system. tho now his friendship with oksana gives him hope, and i'd be lying if i said i didn't have the dumbest pleading face the entire time reading oksana finding him

ok it looks like we're past the chaos and to the aftermath, and GOSH right now it's abundantly clear that no matter what licia's background is, she's still a smol. she's just twelve. and her wanting to cry is such a valid response. gosh it's so satisfying seeing how the past chapters are paying off now.

awww they're all together. and they're fine. this entire thing must be such a shock to mari. a lot of the kids were not looking forward to going home, but she was. still a sweet moment. not much to say here.

oh my goodness mazzen is terrified at the thought of going home because he's worried about actually being safe and i don't blame him. i just have so many questions and STILL not many answers.

i'm trying to figure out who could've done the attack. my first thought is that it probably isn't someone completely new, since we're in the last few chapters and I don't think you'd try to introduce a new villain this late into the story (though this could be a clown prediction). That leaves the Capitolites and the tributes.
The only tributes we haven't heard from (in the sense that we don't know what they're thinking at all) are... Velcra, Rex, Veles, and Oriol. I just don't see them being the culprits since idk how they'd be able to set up the entire thing, though I wouldn't put the idea past Velcra and Veles. I wouldn't be shocked if it ended up being them.
And then we have all the Capitolites, which are more likely imo. We've seen quite a few of them and I guess one of them could be behind it? idk though. major fear.
or was the attack done by a foreign government? idk idk idk
Josephm611 chapter 50 . 5/25/2021

(this pov is going too smoothly i'm expecting stuff to go down)
ok it didn't go down. i love seeing her perspective, it's high up, so removed from the personal trauma our kids have gone through.

GOSH THIS IS ALREADY GETTING ME IN THE FEELS. Goodbye is so hard, even though i know some future circumstance is bound to pull them all back together sometime soon. and I'm so terrified of that. but maybe it will be ok since they'll be reunited? anyway the process still hurts.

but to backtrack a bit the bit with Milo and Micah was cute, as was the bit with Micah and Oksana. They all feel like... they could be going back to normal, that they're not all terribly traumatized
(milo tries to protect oksana and micah omg tho)

OR HIS HERO INSTINCT IS KICKING IN. HALE I LOVE YOU. MY RESPECT FOR YOU JUST WENT UP. iirc didn't he start the story having rejected to rush into a fire to save people? But now he rushes it! He's grown! And he's ordering Inara in after Hosea. Of course Inara and Hosea would rush in. I love them. BUT MILO TOO. AND THE CHARACTER GROWTH. I HATE THAT THIS IS HAPPENING BUT /THEM/

devan... I'M SCARED
but ok. i'm glad they're fine. and i'm glad lex is fine too. and VARRIK CARES gosh i love them so much all of a sudden. BUT I'M STILL FREAKING OUT OVER THE EFFIN EXPLOSION I CAN'T WITH THIS AHHHH

OMG POOR KIDS. POOR KIDS. HAVING TO WITNESS THIS. they all wanted their kids to never witness the gore of the games but then THIS happens. GAH. I NEED ANSWERS. I NEED TO KNOW.

but i can't read the next chapter right now because i have a meeting i hate it here
Josephm611 chapter 49 . 5/25/2021
i can already hear dawn screaming. casitella isn't the ship that has my whole heart, but i love how casi is letting tella in, how tella's teaching casi to be vulnerable, to stop fighting and rest, knowing that there's someone there for you. and that's so sweet. :pleading_face:

all her thinking and questions made me sad. iirc last time we saw her it was happy and warm lisse, but now things are starting to feel bittersweet because it'll be goodbye soon. my heart is stinging too. we've only ever known them /together/; what will happen once they're all split up? anyways, i really enjoyed melancholic lisse. it was a nice change of pace and adds so much depth to her.


REN IS A PRECIOUS BEAN AND HE DESERVES THE WORLD. I love seeing Mazzen get better. That bit with talking about home! they felt like real teenagers, and it made it all so vivid and i'm making the pleading face like REN I LOVE YOU. He doesn't layer it on as thick as Micah does but I love them equally. When Ren said he was glad Mazzen pulled him into it? That tipped me firmly into "i would die for ren mantau" territory.

lex... HIIII
(popping in mid-pov: "go easy on yourself." now that we've established how much lex's mindset mirrors mine sometimes... that hits so weird in my head. like just reading those words and i knew instantaneously exactly how lex would react because it's exactly how /I/ would react. i'm stupidly attached)
(just read the next paragraph: "except she doesn't. lex deserves nothing good, not even a bit of praise, and she knows it." that resonated in the deepest depths of my soul.)
OH MY GOODNESS VAREXA SLAYS ME NOW. The way that feeling lex's mindset suddenly flipped me. before in the arena i wasn't attached because i didn't love either of them, but now seeing their relationship ABSOLUTELY KILLS ME AND I'M VERGING ON BRAINROT TERRITORY AHHHHHHHH

BUT THIS POV MADE ME SO SAD. It wasn't even the biggest thing we've seen so far. Just Ambrose dealing with the fact that he's not going home. And Oksana being sad about separation. GOSH THE SEPARATION MAKES ME SAD TOO. I LOVE IT WHEN THEY'RE TOGETHER. JUST. WHY AM I SO RIDICULOUSLY SAD OVER THIS.

the next two chapter titles scare me :flushed:
Josephm611 chapter 48 . 5/25/2021

he's been in kinda the same place for a while, but we're getting into a nice rhythm and i appreciate it. nothing huge is happening, but i enjoy checking in on him. it's nice. he seems to be slowly improving, and i love watching it slowly unfold

awwwwwww! cal and ilaria make such a great pair. i really love ilaria for doing this apology thing. it's very mature of her. and i love that cal is keeping her company.

veles... i want him to have a redemption arc so bad
...and that's why i'm so invested in this takeover arc. i feel like it has the huge potential to be the Big Event that changes him for the better. please let it be. UGH his voice is so obnoxious but i'm holding on to hope that he'll change

inara... hi girl!
OH MY GOODNESS I'M SO PROUD OF HER! SHE DID IT! i love you hosea for pulling everyone together. you're such a king. But that hug between Inara and Micah was so sweet and I actually teared up. I'm just so proud of her, and I think she's referring to Oriol in the end? YOU CAN DO IT, GIRL! I BELIEVE IN YOU!

oriol... will inara show up?
YES GIRL SHE DOES! AND THIS IS PERFECT! It isn't sobby or huggy like her reunions with Hosea or Micah but it's perfect. I like Oriol now, I think. At least I'm rooting for him. He might have a lot of issues, but deep down, he knows what's right, and he wants to be good. I'm really hoping that it turns for the better.

mazzen... fear
oh my goodness he's falling apart, but i'm so glad that ren is here to help him, at least for now. if anything, I'm most scared for when he has to go back home and deal with velcra and his demons there... i really worry about him, moreso than most of the others.
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