OMG this is so hilarious!
I laughed my head off at every paragraph!
Love it!

I'd do the same hahah
This is so cute!

The writing quality is good in terms of your spelling and grammar, but the following part of the Content Guidelines is broken for being a second person or you-based story:

Entries not allowed:
5. Any form of interactive entry: choose your adventure, second person/you based, Q&As, and etc.

You have to remove all of the elements related to the reader and replace them with a canon character or original character. Switch to first person or third person point of view. You can always put it on another site where it is allowed like Archive Of Our Own or deviantART.