I'm not going to lie I just reviewed so you can get 200. ps love the book

super great, can't wait for more xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A bit sad that Robb or Jon didn't bother trying to convince some of the Children of the Forest to join them in Winterfell. It's explained in the books that they are without purpose and thus they are simply waiting for their race to die off. I believe that if someone provided them with a purpose then at least some of them could be convinced to return south of the wall and maybe tend to the heartrees. Heck they can use their nature magic to help crops grow or something. It's a bonus that they're pretty darn cute according to their book description. Not the show though, they kinda look creepy.

A two million loan just for a feast and tourney? You do realize that's the total debt the crown accumulated to the Lannisters over a period of 15 years. Not in one go.

Most logical of Jon not to take lordship of Skagos. That will be a whole can of worms he doesn't want to get close to. In the beach landing you describe the GreatJon wielding a giant battle axe. GreatJon Umber wields a huge sword in the books that is bigger than even Ice. Combine that with his impressive height of well over 7 feet and you get a truly fearsome figure in battle.

I think you meant Lord Whent's daughter not Darry. The Whent's where the lords of Harrenhal during the tourney.

I think you have the numbers all wrong. Bear Island should be able to muster at least a thousand or even two thousand troops if you compare the numbers in the Robb's army in the books. Having only 700 men to defend the island after being forewarned months in advance as well as raising levies? combine that with the 400 reinforcements that came by boat?

Let's give a very modest estimate that Bear island (Which is as big as Ireland) has around 50,000 inhabitants. If we follow the standard for feudal society then we can assume they have around 250 well trained men at arms with another 250 reserves. A thousand levies that can be raised in a hurry and another thousand if you start getting desperate and arm children and the elderly. Don't forget that Bear Island train their women but even without the women that's about 2,500 troops from Bear Island alone. Let's round them up to 3,000 with Jon's backup. A very different number don't you think? They would still be outnumbered by the Skagosi but not as much.

Lastly, I think you should read up on how sieges work. Not the boring stuff but rather the storming of a castle which what the Skagosi did. First of all, according to this chapter, the Northmen had months to prepare. That is more than enough for fletchers to make enough arrows to last them months. Second, the most basic fortification any defender can and should do when knowing they will be attacked is to dig a moat. Just a dry moat is enough. It would take less than a day for a hundred men to dig a mile of moat 6 feet deep and across. Can you imagine how tough it would be to fill that moat while under fire? Its the reason why castles can be defended with few numbers against armies in the thousands. Also what kind of gate would fall in two hits? is it made of paper?

Btw, Sailing from White Harbor to Bear Island is incredibly impractical. It would take at least two months to go all the way around Westeros. Its much easier for Jon's group to travel from White Harbor to Barrowton then take a boat from there instead.

Good chapter except for the travel times by ship. In the books, Sam took a boat from Eastwatch to Bravos in 10 days. That was also in winter with bad weather conditions. 6 weeks to travel from the Saltspear to Bear Island is WAY too long. 10 days is more precise, maybe 14 if the weather is bad.

A fine chapter. You still don't seem to understand the value of currency though. Here's a simple example. If we assume a Gold Dragon weighs 100 grams and that the coin is at least 30% pure gold then that would equal $2000 US Dollars. In Westeros, Gold Dragons are mostly used by the government and VERY rich nobles. Regular nobles would use Silver Stags (In which 1 GD210 ST). My point is this; Theon, a mere hostage, wouldn't wage 20 gold dragons (The equivalent of $40,000) for the simple fact that he would never be able to have that much gold on him.

Oh wow! I don't think I've heard read a fic that smartly brings Skagos into the plot. I mean Martin has kept teasing us that the Skagosi were pretty much like Wildlings but more advanced. If a tiny archipelago like the Iron Islands can threaten the entire west coast of Westeros then I'm sure a huge island like Skagos (Its at least the size of Ireland, maybe even twice) can threaten the whole North especially since we know next to nothing about its military force.

Too much fluff at the end imo. I much prefer some drama and tragedy in Jon's backstory in order to build character. The part about Aegon is too confusing though. Its much easier to claim that Aegon was sickly like his mother and stick with the theory that fAegon is actually a Blackfyre from the female line. Probably Illyrio's son through Sera.

A shame Jon didn't bond with a raven. Ravens are one of the smartest creatures around and one of the few avians that can imitate sounds (ie: talk) and I believe that if Warg bonded to a raven and trained it enough then he can speak through the bird.

Foolish Jon. You should have left the poor bear to drink lol. Bears, no matter the era, will never attack a human unless they are defending their cubs or are really Really hungry. In this situation, the buck would have been a good distraction. But where's the fun in that lol

Bear in mind though that Wargs are feared among the small folk of the North since the wildlings gave them bad reps. Not sure about the gentries but considering how everyone respected Robb for his connection with Grey Wind in canon then I'll dig that part.

Hmm, Last Lake. I think you mean Long Lake since its the only lake connected to the very eastern edges of the Wolfswood. There is a Last River in the Umber lands though.

Kudos for crediting other fanfic authors for ideas but maybe put the credits at the end of the chapter? If there's one thing that really distracts me when reading its AN mid paragraph.

Not really a fan of Jon being the legitimate son of Rhaegar and Lyanna. I much prefer him remaining a bastard as it build character. Let's face it, GRRM would never make it so cliche and happy ending like by having Jon legitimate. He will be a bastard whether he was born of rape or if Lyanna was seduced. I mean his very existence spits on Rhaegar's so called prophecy since Rhaegar was clamoring about his Visenya only to get a boy instead lol

Excellent use of the Gamer system. Or should I say the Champion System? Very smart way of wording it to a medieval term.

One issue though. There's no way a 10 year old bastard would have one Gold Dragon much less five. 5 Gold dragons is enough to buy a well trained Destrier bred for war. for more info on currency in Westeros I advice checking the official AsoiaF wiki here ( : / awoiaf. westeros index. php / Currency) remove the blanks of course

can't wait for more

Jon and Dacey would be the best pairing