Reviews for Recnac Transfaerso
blackenedsoul chapter 29 . 11/6/2003
aww...great chapter. Heh. I'd never trust Ron giving me a syringe. No offense to him.
ckat44 chapter 29 . 11/6/2003
Great Wonderful chapter! The interaction between all the characters is so real! I love it! I hope Harry doesnt die. I will be very sad. I will probably cry...UPDATE SOON!
Maximum Poofy chapter 29 . 11/6/2003
that's okay! I can wait patiently. great chapter, by the way. You did make me cry again. I don't think I've ever cried so much during a story in my life! I congratulate you! anyhoo, update soon, I need more!
broken teacups chapter 29 . 11/6/2003
I rock? Yay! I rock! Whoopee! Okay, sorry, anyway, I've decided that Charles is one of my favourite characters, though he's already 11, he seems so cute... anyway, I know it's been more than one second since you last updated... go me... okay, I'm being stupid... update soon.
jedidiah chapter 29 . 11/5/2003
Excellent story, Celebony! I really enjoyed your portrayal of Snape in this chapter-I think it captures him rather nicely. I look forward to reading the next installment.
Disassembly of Reason chapter 8 . 11/5/2003
Reviewer Eowyn of Ithilien and celebony between them (the latter in the A/N heading "Detention Discoveries") have already discussed the realism of Harry's lack of effective self-defense against Vernon in this chapter, I know.

- Harry's been conditioned (in this AU, anyhow) all his life to tolerate the Dursleys' abuse, up to a point. He's used to bearing it, mostly retaliating only with verbal comebacks as far as the adults are concerned rather than physical defense. This last would have been a pattern set when he was too small for effective resistance. Note that he *does* try to explain himself, and does physically hit back once injured. (That's what resulted in his being thrown into the table, in fact, and getting hurt even more when he still kept trying to fight back.)

- Thanks to Hopkirk's letters from the Underage Magic lot, Harry's also conditioned *not* to use magic in the Muggle world, *ever*, due to the risk of expulsion (and being condemned to live at Number Four full-time again).

(On a side note, may I recommend lilahp's "Unfortunate Circumstances" over at Sugar Quill. The story opens in the wake of a one-sided clash between Harry and Vernon – the strong-willed Harry we all know, who happens to be at a disadvantage. Ron's character is very well handled therein, and asks the obvious question about why Harry doesn't fight back.)

Hmm. Vernon is the most physically violent of the Dursleys, but Petunia and Dudley are worse, on some levels. Eww.

It sounds to me like Harry has other internal injuries besides the obvious broken ribs, given his symptoms now and later before some proper magic is applied.

Ugly contrast: avoiding the Stensons' hugs because of the pain, only to have Vernon grab his shoulder and deliberately apply pressure on a bad spot.

"Though he always tried his best to ignore every word that exited his uncle's mouth, what he had said hit a button and Harry couldn't help but see some truth behind it." No wonder Harry has trouble fighting back effectively; the people who've known you from childhood – even such a poor excuse for a childhood – know where you're most vulnerable. True, the Dursleys don't strike one as perceptive in general, but abusive-Vernon does seem the type to turn his otherwise non-existent imagination to the purpose of tormenting someone else. (The author Dean Koontz had a line in _Dragon Tears_ about an abusive man, otherwise lacking in any kind of drive, who was energetic enough at crushing the spirit of a wife. Same sort of thing for Vernon – he won't use imagination for anything worthwhile, but will bring it out to inflict emotional damage on Harry.)

Nice throwaway line, that Harry always tries to be early at King's Cross after the incident in second year.

Judging from celebony's remarks about the progress of the now-transferred illness, and from other evidence later on, the fever seems most likely to be the result of the glass-inflicted cuts becoming infected. (Possibly from internal injuries, but infection seems to explain the fever adequately.) The numbness setting in later in the day is a nice bit of attention to detail. Infected wounds really do behave that way when they're starting to go bad, as far as I know, and only really start hurting again when they're being opened up and cleaned out properly (as in fact happens in this story).

No reason for Harry's friends to think "abuse" when Harry's doing very well covering up that he's even unwell for such a long stretch. And they have no particular reason to think about the seemingly peripheral issue of the Dursleys when he has so many apparently more immediate problems in the magical world. (Most wizarding folk seem to behave as though the Muggle world only exists when they have to be out in it themselves, forgetting about it as irrelevant the rest of the time. Seems like a very common wizarding tendency to see the wizarding and Muggle worlds as almost completely separated, with a blind spot for Muggle-born / raised magic users like Hermione and Harry who deal with issues where the two worlds touch, and can't completely ignore the Muggle world.)

"Harry, haven't you ever had someone take care of you when you were sick before." Good scene construction leading up to Harry's response. Harry's lived like this almost his whole life; he wouldn't quite see how appalling the neglect is; and he's just disoriented enough not to censor himself. I rather like nurturing scenes like this; the poor kid has been so starved of decent caring for so much of his life. Sad that Hermione's attempts to soothe him while he's being sick hurt him without her knowing it.

Having seen some reviewers' remarks about Harry needing to put aside his pride and ask for help...I don't think Harry's silence about the abuse is driven by pride (thinking he's too strong to need help) or fortitude, although he has both those characteristics and they do play into it. Harry's remark in "Rescue" later on is telling, when he observes one person's reaction to the knowledge of this particular secret. "And people wonder why I don't like telling people things. One more look of pity and I might scream." It's not that he's too proud to accept help, exactly – he does that all the time with his friends, although he's inclined to refuse it if it puts them at risk. I think that on a deep level, Harry feels that he'll get one of two reactions to making himself vulnerable by opening up and letting out this secret.

- If the person he's opened up to doesn't care, or doesn't believe him, it's at best wasted effort, and at worst put a weapon in that person's hands.

- If the person *does* care, but pities Harry, I think Harry feels he's lost their respect. That they'll put him in a mental slot that says 'abused kid' (or whichever secret happens to apply) and interact with him as though that role were all he was, instead of being *Harry*, the person. He gets enough of people interacting with an image instead of him just from being the-Boy-Who-Lived and all. He'd rather not have people dismissing him with 'poor kid' and not *listening* to him ever again.

- And once he's given up a secret, he's given up a certain amount of control of his situation - and he has so little to begin with that it would be precious to him.

Harry has also had reason to believe for most of his life that certain things are a constant, particularly his situation with the Dursleys after the Stensons' failed efforts to help Harry through channels over the summer. What would be the point, from his POV, in repeating a failed attempt? Especially when the net result would be to change his friends' and mentors' perceptions of him in a way he'd rather avoid, without materially changing his own situation for the better. Sirius' reaction in "Rescue" was a close call, from that perspective (see); Sirius almost got himself into *deep* trouble.

Basically Harry has a very normal human tendency to lock himself into a belief system. He's got a certain set of what seem to him to be constants in his life – that seem to him as though they'll never change. Things like considering himself ultimately to be alone and responsible for himself, for instance, which is as hard for him to unlearn on some levels as Snape will find his belief system about Harry and James Potter. Frankly, if Harry'd believed anything else as a young child, he'd have been lucky to survive Privet Drive at all, let alone in as good a shape emotionally as he is. Imagine what he'd have been turned into if he'd been desperate for the Dursleys' affection, for instance. (Or don't. It's a nasty thought.) He just couldn't afford to depend on those people any more than he could avoid.

Ah, well, enough. I hope I've made myself clear that this is just my take on how Harry's mind works – reality from his POV, not objective reality. Getting him OUT of there is of course desirable, it's just not on his mental map of things that can ever really happen.
Eowyn of Ithilien chapter 28 . 11/3/2003
Fear not! I have yet to abandon you! I have no realy excuse for my lack of reviews except fior the combined factors of schoolwork, the Fall Play, and the huge jerk that continues to live-namely me. Yes, I love how you play with Snape, I am terrified that you are drooling over Harry, the male prostitute, and I am appeased to know that I am not alone in worshipping Indian movies as a form of art, excuse for perversion, and an oppurtunity to annoy my family. I shall have to check out the Guru. *takes a deep breath* Whew...I'm back.

The opening scene was awesome because it had a SLYTHERIN being picked on by GRYFFINDORS. Wow...it's just so different from the generic fanfics...it probably does happen, but no one evers writes about it...it makes your characters more realistic that you can write in the good with the bad. And of course, more cheek-pinching Harry.

Hahahahaha...I'll never get over how funny and cool it is when Snape is concerned, but tries not to show it...When he scowls at the teachers and tells them not to say a word, I had this weird image of Snape trying to act macho and it soon turned into a music video for "Macho Man" with Snape as the star, which in turn transformed into the video for "If you think I'm sexy and you want my body..." by Rod Stewart, featuring Snape rubbing nacho sauce over his shirtless body. *shiver* Does anyone seriously find Rod Stewart sexy? Do you really want his body?...I don't think so...Anywho...

This may be a legitimate HP spell by Rowling, but did you make up "Confundus." I really couldn't get past the opinion that it sounds like the name of something that is steadily growing in between my brother's toes.

I !LOVE! your description of Harry's confusion after Cho cast the spell on him...I understood the story and yet...I felt his confusion...it was awesom. I also love how you compare Cho's arm to a snake...EXCELLENT! Can't get over how clever and absolutely awesom that is...

And the part when Hermione says something like, "Who knows what Cho could have done to you if I hadn't come along," left so many doorways open in my mind...I didn't even want to think about what that EVIL BITCH! was capable of doing to our poor, sweet Harry.

LOVED IT! LOVED IT! LOVED IT!

Eowyn of Ithilien
PENNYPACKER chapter 28 . 11/3/2003
Omg your story is so now its my fave fanfiction story.I like the parts with Cho because I dont like her either.I think that he shud get together with Ginny because thats really the only need to add another chapter soon because I am getting impatient.I dont think that Harry should die because that would make it an unhappy ending.I think that Cho should fall through a crevice shaft and die in a hole and Harry should get a pet flamingo thats name is Wulfric who eats dont worry im jk..or am he should meet a leprechaun that would be very kewl because I love those leprechauns I mean jeez everybody loves I think that your story is excellent so keep doing it because It would sadden me if you didnt.

~PENNYPACKER~
Disassembly of Reason chapter 7 . 11/3/2003
Sigh. Again, depressingly realistic situation with Vernon - not only is he not tucked away in Azkaban for abusing Harry, he's coming up with plausible lies and influence with the Muggle authorities that let him get away with a *breathtaking* level of cruelty.

And of course, Harry's long experience with the Dursleys has him analyzing the situation with an expert eye once he's locked up again. Come to think of it, no wonder he's so good at the tactical aspects of DADA. He's certainly had to learn to think on his feet at Number Four. I imagine it's also why he's somewhat weak at strategic/long-range planning – he's had to learn to be so good at reacting to the immediate situation that he's never had the leisure to learn to think a few extra steps ahead.

I was somewhat surprised that Vernon planned to take Harry back to King's Cross on time without having to be argued into it, but on reflection the Dursleys know perfectly well that somebody would come *looking* for Harry if he didn't turn up. And we wouldn't want wizards showing up at the door, would we, Petunia?

And naturally, just as Harry sneaks in after accomplishing this great thing at such terrible cost, Vernon catches him. A nice touch that the one person who'll eventually know everything about what happened to Harry over Christmas will be Snape, who finds out gradually ("Detention Discoveries", then the final pieces of the puzzle in "Friendship"). Of all the people who could have found out the whole story, Snape is the one with the most potential to be affected by it. Harry's friends would just be beside themselves, but not surprised; Snape can actually learn something from it that he doesn't already know.
Disassembly of Reason chapter 6 . 11/3/2003
Nice attention to detail on celebony's part, that Harry wouldn't know how the family - any family, really - normally handled the opening of the Christmas presents. He probably was let out of his cupboard on Christmas Day when he was little – for chores if nothing else – but we already know from Dudley's birthdays how Dudley-centric any present situation at the Dursleys would be. Harry's just never seen a family gift-giving situation with more than one kid allowed to participate. (And if Marge came over for Christmas, I'd try to hide if I were Harry, not watch.)

The house key was a grand idea for a present. (Like the fanfic notion of the Weasleys adding Harry to their clock.) Reinforces the feeling that Harry's been accepted into the family, the best present anyone could give him.

Harry did a great job of revealing his wizardry to the Stensons. (Would have been much more difficult if he hadn't been allowed to do magic personally; magical presents could always be explained away.) Well thought out that Hermione would have been the most help to him in picking out suitable magical gifts for a Muggle family – of course she'd be the expert by now.

So celebony's call of allowing students to do magic over the winter holidays served at least two purposes:

- makes it much easier and less time-consuming for Harry to reveal the existence of the magical world to the Stensons

- (the big point) allows Harry to perform the transfer spell without immediately being busted by the Underage Magic lot

I admire writing that makes every piece serve a purpose, without throwing anything in just as filler; celebony seems good at this. (As a side note, I recommend among published works of fiction those of Jill Paton Walsh, particularly her Imogen Quy mysteries such as _A Piece of Justice_.) It's hard to strip down a story to avoid filler, where everything serves at least one purpose to help the story along. (The anti-example of *that*, of course, would be Robert Jordan, IMO.)

"They don't want me to ruin their picturesquely normal family by being different." And that would be true even if Harry weren't a wizard. The Dursleys are just so WRONG. (News flash, I know.) Very good to see Mrs. Stenson's gentleness with Harry, and that he's so vulnerable in the face of the Stensons' support that he can't meet anyone's eyes on his own.

I've sometimes wondered, if when all is said and done with Voldemort, if Harry might not become a Healer, if he's had enough of more aggressive resistance to evil by then. (In canon, I mean. The OWLs required to be a Healer are about the same as to be an Auror, incidentally.) Mostly just wishful thinking on my part, though, that someday the kid will get a break. :) Harry handles explaining the transfer spell to Mr. Stenson very well – or perhaps that's just his knack for teaching kicking in. He's explained all the consequences, from Mr. Stenson's POV – and naturally left out the snags that affect Harry as the spell-caster but not Mr. Stenson. As I mentioned in my review of chapter 1, it's absolutely necessary to the story that Harry *not* reveal that – otherwise Stenson would have to be acting OOC to let Harry do the spell, or otherwise would have to be less deserving of a chance at life than he is.
Disassembly of Reason chapter 26 . 11/3/2003
Nicely downplayed bit at the beginning of the chapter about Harry's increasing fatigue, and how Ron turns it into a joke to help make it more bearable.

Harry's shyness at interrupting Ron and Hermione's moment in the common room is very sweet of him. Makes such an ugly contrast with the lies being fed to the press about *his* love life in Hogsmeade. (I've noticed a couple of chapters featuring contrasts like that in this fic, specifically "Reactions" addressing both Sirius and Snape. I like it as a story construction technique, whether it's conscious on celebony's part or not.)

Good idea that Skeeter isn't the only scuzzy reporter in the wizarding world. I think celebony's notion that Harry would be pursued by paparazzi when he's out in public is quite realistic. We can explain their absence up to this point by the simple fact that Harry's inside the castle grounds 10 months out of the year, barring a handful of Hogsmeade visits, and the rest of the time he's on Privet Drive or at the Burrow.

"Now, as we said before, he's totally anonymous, this black-haired person."

"Now, Fred, don't give too much away. Don't tell him about the glasses or anything."

"Of course not, dear brother, as long as you don't mention the lightning-bolt shaped scar."

"Hmm...sounds quite dashing," Harry said in mock thoughtfulness.

Cool rescue by twins. The conversation with Harry about their anonymous backer is a scream. :) Ominous, sad note that they're starting to worry about what's wrong with Harry.

*Love* Harry telling off Cho. It's funny, though, that the teachers don't notice that this situation might very well get violent. (Then again, the interview was in the tabloid Witch Weekly rather than the Prophet, so fewer teachers would be reading it over their meal, I imagine.) Given that Harry hauled Cho outside rather than confronting her on the spot – thus suggesting he was at least TRYING to make it less public – wouldn't she have to taunt him before he'd stop caring about the audience they'd collected? Or was that just to keep the teachers from breaking it up before he'd had his say?

(Actually it *did* get violent, now that I re-read it. It doesn't seem fair that Cho can hit Harry hard enough to draw blood and not get any punishment. But Harry being Harry, it wouldn't occur to him to complain about a minor flesh wound like that. He'd say no real damage was done, since he was able to fix it right away. Now if she did it to somebody *else* in his presence, he'd react to the bullying...)

Sinistra isn't head of house for Ravenclaw; that's Flitwick, but celebony didn't spell out why Sinistra came over when Cho started yelling, so that's sort of covered. If the intent was for the character to be the head of house, though, suggest celebony retouch the scene to swap in Flitwick (shouldn't take much revision). (Another piece of Lexicon trivia, from Rowling's interviews IIRC).

I hope the snakeskin incident isn't the last of the twins' efforts, especially after the incident in "Detention". Please have them find out about that. Would it be in character for Hermione to let the information slip to the twins, given that she doesn't know about Cho's new *cough* beta-tester status? (Maybe telling Ron over breakfast while the twins are around? Or would it be more in character to mention it to Ginny rather than let Ron know Harry's getting attacked by a girl?)

The stalking coupled with the incident in the Detention chapter implies Harry's in some real danger here.

- He's gifted at DDA, but might hesitate against someone who's a less blatant force of evil than, say, Draco Malfoy, especially a girl. (Chivalry, I hasten to add, not sexism.)

- Harry avoids anything he knows would risk expulsion, and his own suffering disarms him somewhat from aggression, or even taking the initiative in defense when the opponent isn't clear-cut evil.

- Cho's had a year's more schooling than he, and if she's from a wizarding family, even more practical experience than the extra year just in picking up context, so experience might tip the scales in her favor even if Harry has more potential than she does.
Disassembly of Reason chapter 28 . 11/3/2003
"I think you all owe him an apology, but I won't make you give one, since I happen to hate insincerity." True enough, after life with the Dursleys.

A really cool touch that the kid being bullied is Crabbe's little brother. Protecting random-little-Slytherin is one thing, but it shows integrity that Harry didn't say anything about Vincent on finding out the kid's identity, and even went out of his way to teach Charles the Disarming Spell. It's sweet that Harry thinks Charles Crabbe could use a better role model than his brother Vincent - totally unconscious that he himself has probably just become one.

That it happened over a diary is a nice hint that Charles is more intellectual than his brother; he writes *voluntarily*.

Nice bit of development that Malfoy witnessed this under circumstances that made it obvious that

- Harry had nothing to gain by sticking up for a Slytherin (he wasn't showing off for anyone, and in fact was facing down a pack of other kids)

- Harry didn't take it back once he knew of Charles' relationship to Vincent, and in fact went an extra step and taught him a useful self-defense move

Regarding the decision (a wise move) not to inform *anybody* about the Sunimoon idea. I wouldn't give much for Snape's chances of surviving if Harry actually pulls off his Pyrrhic-victory cancer spell plan – Sirius will be only one of a small army of people who'd want to hang Snape to a sour apple tree if they found out he helped Harry arrange yet *another* self-sacrifice ploy. (Personally, I think it's Harry's decision to make, and that given the circumstances he's got a point in not wanting his death to be wasted. But I also understand that those who love him would really, really lose it, and I think they'd take it out on Snape as the only available target afterward.) But Snape's cool, analytical side probably lets him appreciate the good points of the plan without concerning himself with personal risks like that; anybody with the guts to spy on Voldemort up close and personal day after day isn't going to give up a good plan just because he may be lynched afterward - especially since he'd be torn up inside too, just showing it less.

Using a blinding spell in a duel reminds me of the Silencing Charm that proved so devastating in a certain duel situation in JKR's own work. Good tactic.

"None of you say a word." How typical of Snape that even though he now can't help showing that he's worried, and is even coming to the point of working side by side with Lupin to help Harry after his collapse, he isn't about to have anybody officially take notice of it. The house point exchange afterward is *really* cute. :)

Very dangerous that Harry essentially let Cho get away with the stalking incident. I think he'd be in serious danger of rape if she weren't so much more obsessed with being photographed with him than being with him. I won't be at all surprised if Cho escalates this (actually, I'll be surprised if she doesn't). I only hope Cho is stopped before she hurts Harry more than she has already. (Totally in character for Harry that he wouldn't wake up to this; the kind of abuse he's suffered isn't in that area, and has isolated him from social contact for all his non-Hogwarts life. He's just unaware.)

Confundus charm was a good choice. Harry's resistant to Imperius, so that wouldn't work. We know little about Confundus from canon except what was said about fooling the Goblet, and this usage is consistent with what we do know. While Harry might be expected to be resistant to this as well – and seems to be, a little – it takes him a while to get the hang of throwing off curses like this, and he's never been exposed before.

Dangerous as it is for Harry to let Cho's assault pass, though, it's typical that he would resist going to Dumbledore. (Reinforced in canon by his reaction to detention with Umbridge, although I know celebony started this fic pre-OOTP).

- Up until his first year, Harry never had anyone to rely on, and he's had less than five full years to learn about friends, and internalize that it's even *possible* to get help.

- At this point, I think the Cho situation seems to him to be just embarrassing, rather than potentially threatening.

- Doing something would mean confronting Cho in front of her head of house (Flitwick, though, so could be worse), and raking the whole mess up in front of the staff.

- Hermione only saw part of the incident, so basically it's Harry's Confunded word against Cho's, and Harry knows that Cho is good at spin control from the newspaper incident. Harry's intelligent enough to have grasped that if somebody is interfering with him in any way, but there were no witnesses, then a confrontation about it is from a position of weakness. (The incident with Vernon and Child Protective Services, for one.)

Current status, if I can get all this straight on paper:

- Only Snape has all the pieces of the puzzle; he's the only one aware of the Sunimoon magic, and Harry's tentative plan to use his own death as a weapon.

- Only Ron of Harry's younger wizarding friends knows about the abuse, and of course knows about the cancer.

- Hermione, Eloise, and Neville know about the illness, but not the abuse. Of this group, only Neville has a realistic chance of finding out about the abuse (much as Ron did).

- Otherwise, the Stensons, Dumbledore, McGonagall, Lupin, Black; and Pomfrey know about both the cancer and the abuse.

Basically, we're still in the secrets scenario where each trusted person doesn't realize there are more layers to this.

Won't Ginny be particularly torn up when she finds out about Harry's illness, once she realizes that Harry essentially did this because he didn't realize he meant much to anyone? (Duh, says the reader.) Sirius and Ron have both talked about that issue with Harry some, of course, especially Ron in "Friendship".
Disassembly of Reason chapter 19 . 11/2/2003
"They always did their best to wipe away these thoughts, more content with the belief that Harry was fine than venturing into the frightening territory of wondering if maybe it was something more."

Good touch of realism that Harry's fellow students are smart enough to begin getting suspicious. And the poor kid still doesn't really get how many people care about him so much.

And in this chapter we introduce one of the villains of the piece: Cho Chang. If calling her a villain isn't giving her more credit than she deserves...

Cho isn't in character as of OOTP, but celebony's being deliberately AU here. I have no problem with deliberate design decisions like this – especially since this Cho is more fun than canon. :) "Hi, Harry. Remember, I'm single now." Good Lord, that's not just blunt, that's *cold*.

Question: why did that decent bloke Cedric stay with Cho so long, in the context of this AU? Or was her "relationship" with him more her faking a public image than really having a relationship (like her supposed relationship with Harry here)? I can understand Cedric not knowing her well and thinking of her as someone he'd miss, like Harry being attracted by her from a distance in 3rd and 4th years. She'd have treated Cedric OK at the Yule Ball, since he was the higher-status Hogwarts champion (according to Harry in GoF, Cedric was the catch then, not him), unlike her date later on in this story. Was Cedric just supposed to be clueless, or infatuated? Or was she just a good actress, or something? I liked the guy, myself, especially in the last few moments in the maze in GoF. I'd rather he weren't completely brainless, regardless of what the Weasley twins thought of him.

A bit more about Cho later on.

"No, but I think I know who I'm going to ask this year." Was Harry really intending to ask Eloise at this point, or was that more of a snap decision when he saw how distressed she was at their study session? On re-reading, I suppose he *was* intending to ask her all along, but I admit I jumped to the wrong conclusion the first time I read this chapter. I like it that Harry's not shallow, and would rather make a friend happy than go with a trophy date or some random girl this time.

"As hard as it was to ask a girl to a dance, the harder it must have been to wait to be asked, especially knowing you didn't get asked the previous year, as was Eloise's case."

Only other fic I've seen use Eloise is _After the End_, set some years down the line. Good that Harry remembers Ron's callous remark and feels guilty now that he knows her. Eloise really is a nice girl and a good friend to Harry. She made sure he knew what he was getting into socially by asking her, double-checked that he'd really be up to it what with being sick, and wasn't going to treat him like a reserve date if he couldn't go. Good for her. Roger Davies is lucky, although he doesn't know it yet.

Nice touch of characterization, that Ginny is having trouble in Muggle Studies and is embarrassed about it. Harry's teaching abilities are coming out this year, aren't they? Tutoring Neville and Eloise in Potions, and now Ginny in Muggle Studies. "Never let me hear the words 'I should have taken Divination' again." Right on, Harry. And the study sessions are a good way to expand his circle of close friends; up till this year he's generally hung out only with Ron, Hermione, and to a lesser extent the twins, or at least that's the impression I tended to get. (On the other hand, thanks to Dudley, he had *no* experience with friendship at all until his first year, so he's doing quite well when that's taken into account.)

The water fight – and Harry reassuring Ron that he's OK with R/H if it happens – is a good breather before Medusa reappears. Thank the Lord Harry is over her, and that he's a good enough friend to be insulted on Eloise's behalf when Cho patronizes her so much.

Fics containing some serious Cho-bashing:

- _Ginny's Fourth Year_ by the Eighth Weasley (Contains some very rough stuff for Ginny, though.) Cho turns out to be really nasty, in a way Harry would not pick up on because she behaves differently around his female friends than around him. I liked that touch, as it explained why Harry's POV in canon wouldn't match the Cho that Ginny and Hermione had to deal with in that story.

- "You Will Cry for Me" over on checkmated was shaping up to Cho-bashing, but appears to have been discontinued.

- "One Day in Hogsmeade" over on SIYE doesn't exactly bash Cho, but she's not, shall we say, living happily ever after.

- The most realistic pre-OOTP Cho-bashing fanfic I remember had Harry ask Cho to Hogsmeade – only to find out, during their first real conversation, that she was extremely shallow, and of all things, a big Trelawney fan. Unfortunately, I cannot remember the title at all.

-

Response to celebony's question about James Potter's Quidditch position: he was indeed a Chaser, according to JKR's second Scholastic interview. (Check the Harry Potter Lexicon for details; the site sources page will refer you to the interview if you'd like to see the raw data.) It's a FAQ at the Lexicon, and gets a mention both on the Lexicon's pages for James Potter and for Quidditch (the latter deals with that plaque from the movie in particular). Unless JKR changes her mind and says differently in an actual HP book or explicitly says something else in an interview, Chaser is the official word.
Disassembly of Reason chapter 20 . 11/2/2003
Nitpick: in canon, unless something unusual like Malfoy's injury before the opening match in PoA happens, Gryffindor / Slytherin is always the first match, in October. (See the detailed analysis over at the Harry Potter Lexicon, anybody who's interested in more details about the traditional schedule as worked out from evidence from the books.) But this is AU, so celebony can get away with this. And in this fic, it's really important that Gryffindor / Slytherin be played after Christmas, so I'll look the other way just this once.

(Yes, I know nobody cares whether I'm the sad sort of person who catches people out on errors of trivia or not.) The last match of the season in canon always seems to fall after Easter break, but can be in May (OOTP) or June (SS). So presumably it's May now in the story. Or is this a pre-Easter break match?

Come to think of it, since the Quidditch schedule is already AU, possibly Harry might not stay at Hogwarts over Easter break, if it hasn't come up yet in the story? Or would that put him at too much risk of Death Eater attack if he stayed with Sirius over Easter for once?

The last match of the season is traditionally Gryffindor / Ravenclaw. Here's an evil thought: what would it have been like to watch this AU Cho and Harry play against each other? (Pity we didn't get to see in OOTP; maybe she'd have reacted to Harry the same way Michael reacted to Ginny. Cho threw a tantrum as it was, as I recall.)

Beautiful touch of character development for Snape, after seeing Harry save Draco from falling, and knowing Draco, he himself, and James aren't/weren't that magnanimus. "I do not respect James Potter's son." Yeah, sure, Severus. :) I like the realism that Snape is clinging to his personal belief system like a kid to a favourite toy; most people really, really hate to let go of any long-standing beliefs and ideas, so of course Snape is putting up a fight. But he's a little too intellectually honest– his scholar's ethics, perhaps? – to just ignore the facts about Harry. I like the fact that Snape's a little more grown-up here than his canon counterpart seems to be.

Very mature behaviour on Harry's part when speaking with Malfoy in the Hospital Wing, I thought. (Seems in character, too, that he'd be honest in that polite way; facing death does that to a person, I expect. He's not messing around anymore.)

In an A/N to "Parties", celebony referred in passing to the concept known in canon as a wizard's debt. Snape (see last chapter of _Stone_) owed one to Harry's father, and Pettigrew (PoA 22) owes one to Harry. As Dumbledore said therein, "When one wizard saves another wizard's life, it creates a certain bond between them." Ginny also owes one to Harry, but JKR hasn't done much yet with that one.

So under the circumstances, I'd say Malfoy is definitely in Harry's debt now.

And I completely lost it laughing at one point. "He almost expected Malfoy to have an alien break out of his stomach and try to eat Harry's brain." The next thing Harry thought after that was *exactly* what I was thinking. :)

As another A/N to "Parties" mentioned that Malfoy has indeed guessed about Harry's home life – very neat plot construction. Saving Malfoy's own life is just about the only thing I can believe would shut Draco's mouth long enough to make him stop and think about Harry as a person, and *not* spread embarrassing information about Harry all over the school. Mind you, if Draco had done that, he might have been in for a surprise from Snape afterward.

All in all, I like very much what celebony is doing with Snape, Malfoy, and the various Slytherin supporting characters in this fic. They're still in character, but they're not 2D evil. Better still, those who are being redeemed a little are growing gradually instead of changing beyond recognition due to any one-shot epiphanies.
Disassembly of Reason chapter 21 . 11/2/2003
"Well, I think he did the right thing. It's not his fault he has more maturity than you lot put together."

Nice little exchange and setup for Harry and Ginny to talk for a bit. I wish celebony hadn't kept saying they won't get together in this fic; one could at least hope for a little development on that front...

The Quidditch team's Muggle victory drink (courtesy of Dean Thomas) adds a kind of realism: even young witches and wizards embarrass themselves with this kind of thing. :)

Nice original idea to have Harry suggest that George take Kota to the ball. The situation in canon between Harry and the Dursleys, and JKR's disinclination to explore the characters of Hermione's parents, reinforces the false impression that the Muggle and magical worlds never meet or touch, which is patently false. Celebony's doing some interesting things in this story, exploring how much Muggles in a privileged position can be allowed to interact with the magical world.

So cute that Ron freaked out so badly at asking Hermione to the ball. And as he said in "Friendship", his friend Harry is of course there to calm him down when he really needs it.

Ginny's fast thinking to keep Seamus and Dean out of the way is very reminiscent of OOTP 32, specifically the Garrotting Gas story she and Luna used to help divert people away from Umbridge's office. Very much in character and JKR-ish.

If the unnamed Ravenclaw Ginny went to the ball with was supposed to be Michael Corner, I suspect he's actually in Harry's year rather than her own. (There's nothing in canon yet to prove or disprove either theory, by the way. I just think it more likely that Cho would date someone one year rather than two years younger than she was, at the end of OOTP. Michael's not named in the Sorting Hat's roll call in _Stone_, but by the time it got to the C's Harry's nerves were getting the better of him and he wasn't listening properly.)

Regarding celebony's A/N to Eowyn: Even in canon, Harry has injury issues; think 'I must not tell lies.' (shudder) And no wonder – I don't believe for a minute that the Dursleys ever comforted him when he was hurt or sick.
4,541 | « Prev Page 1 .. 249 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 269 .. Last Next »