|Reviews for The Promise of Rebellion|
| pyr0 chapter 2 . 12/11/2003
I'm glad you're not bashing Gillette lol. He's such a cute little person...*sigh* ANYWAY, its coming along great. Planning to write some more?
| Links-Eklipse chapter 2 . 12/7/2003
i like the idea. i like your character josaline. im not sure about a long term relationship. maybe he could meet up with her a few more times but i dont think it should be anything serious. and i agree with DragonLadyKhushrenada you should elaborate on how Jack rubbed off on Norrington. its a good idea you just need to explain it a little more. but good story...keep writing.
| PatchworkDK chapter 2 . 8/29/2003
Hmm. The concept of the fic, namely the storming of Tortuga, is very interesting. You do a good job with Josaline in showing the low-cielinged hopes of a 18th century whore.
However, you plot has one major hole in it: Norrington is a gentleman. He would not order the use of hostages, nor would he order that civilians be put in the way of a battle. He would tell his crew to return fire if those civilians fired in his men, but no more. His actions in chapter two are very out of character; as Elizabeth even admitted, "[Norrington] is a fine man."
While Jack Sparrow might have rubbed off on him, you can't just plug that in a single sentence and call it good. You have to show the change for the change to be credible. You have not shown the change, so your fic looks as if you couldn't think up a villain on your own and twisted Norrington to suit your needs.
Problem two is Gillette. In the movie Gillette is undoubtedly snarky ("A mermaid flopped up on deck and told him the whole story"), and he does follow Norrington around like a puppy, he isn't incompetent. He isn't a toady. He is a First Lieutnant who would NOT call his superior by his last name alone, nor would he be completely ignored by said superior. Military discipline forbids both, as does their gentlemanly manners.
However, other than these two OOCs, you've got a smashing concept, and an original one. No one yet I've seen has thought of having Tortuga stormed by the Fleet.
And one other detail: in the movie, it's "the king's navy," not the queen's. But no one else besides OCD me would have noticed.
| Iorhael chapter 2 . 8/18/2003
I don't usually read stories with female characters in them. :) But I can't see other ways in which I can say my thanks to you for reviewing my story.
But thanks to you, I know now there is Pirates category in ffnet, and I like this story of yours. Keep writing! Although knowing that I haven't seen Pirates I don't know if what you have here are original characters or not. But I still like it.
I can see that you like Pippin. Me, too! You see in FOTR SE where he already eats 4 lembas? I laughed so loud that my stomach hurt!
Please keep on reading. Have you tried my other stories?
| Jehan's Muse chapter 2 . 8/2/2003
*growls* Damn you, Gillette. I never did like him. I really like how you're telling it from Norrington's side rather than the pirates' side...now, being a pacifist, I don't approve of Norrington's plan to kill the entire population of Tortuga, but I admire how you manage not to make him seem like a villain, just a guy doing his job. Very nice.
One thing, though. At one point, Gillette addresses him as "Norrington." If Norrington's an admiral, and this jerk is a lieutenant, isn't that considered a serious offense? Even if it was in the heat of the moment, I should think Norrington would probably have ordered him to be punished, or at the very least given him a good chewing-out. But who cares? I'm interested.
| Lyns chapter 2 . 8/2/2003
I don't think there should be a long-lasting relationship between Josaline and Sparrow. Doesn't seem like the kind of thing Sparrow OR Josaline would do, eh? But otherwise, I like the plot you're starting with Norrington/Gillete.
| WillowVilya chapter 1 . 8/2/2003
oh I like it.
throes of passion, it made me giggle.
So i am immature, sue me...
| Truffles chapter 1 . 7/29/2003
oh about the summary you do know that Gilette is the name of a brand of razor?