Reviews for All in a Day
123456789123 chapter 26 . 1/20/2005
You killed Greg! Ah! Poor Greg. I kind of zoned out in your story after that (sorry),but the parts that I weren't upset over were good.
Orion chapter 26 . 7/28/2004
Wow. Man. That was an... interesting fan fic. I really liked the way you used all different POV's. Very cool, but what a way to go for Vega and Greg. ::tear:: Well, keep writing and we'll keep reviewing!

The Phantom Reviewer

a.k.a. Orion
icanreadncount chapter 26 . 12/29/2003
GREAT story! I love how you used the different POV's. Very deep, psychological stuff. It's awesome!
Chemystical chapter 15 . 12/2/2003
Sorry i didn't mean to sound harsh...I'm just a bit of a greg fan : P lol
Chemystical chapter 26 . 12/2/2003
Firstly I'd like to say that i think all the case stuff was really well done. Really realistic, and very much like we see on the show.
But what your fic gained in that department, it lost in the characterisation.
I mean, wouldn't the team have been a little more upset about Greg? I know i'd be for the sole reason that he's just so darn cute!
And what's with Grissom just 'moving on'?
I know he can seem a bit cold, but he's not entirely heartless. He would have been a little shaken.
I thought you had a good story, but i'm sorry, your characters just seemed a little too unconcerned.
"No, he isn't. He's dead. I'm sorry," -Warrick
I dunno, how bout...
He looked into her eyes, his own filled with emotion, and said,
"He was shot at the scene," he gulped
"He didn't make it, I'm so sorry."
Jacqui, seeing the tears that were about to brim over, and spill down his cheeks, forgot all unfamiliarity she had with Warrick, and did what came as instinct-she embraced him in a hug.
She understood every word he didn't say, the same words her confused mind wouldn't let her say.
Greg was an asset to the team, and it would take a long time before for the emptyness left in his wake to be filled...
Sorry, i got kind of carried away, but the point i'm trying to make is
MORE EMOTION! That may have been cheesy, but no-one wants our favourite characters to seem cruel, heartless and uncaring do they?
Please keep writing, I am in no way saying that you are a bad writer. Your style is engaging and very enjoyable, just maybe keep what I said in mind!
x
jd burns chapter 14 . 9/23/2003
Well, at least they seem to be beginning to put the pieces together, but it's still a race against time...but why did you have to kill Greg?Don't you like Greg?
jd burns chapter 22 . 9/23/2003
I think I have to go with Warrick on this one. Mrs Stein is a little *too* calm.
jd burns chapter 1 . 9/23/2003
Like the first person viewpoint. You do it really well!
Grav chapter 22 . 9/22/2003
E! Sorry. Now that's I got that out of my system, This is so awesome! The POV switches totally prolong the agony and it rocks! You rock my dear. I love this story.

Grav
Jennifer-Phoenix chapter 19 . 9/14/2003
This is really good. Beautifully portrayed and good chapter devision. Easy to understand. very good work!

Jen
fe chapter 19 . 9/14/2003
This was a bit slow to start with, but so exciting now! Please update soon!
Grav chapter 18 . 9/10/2003
I hope it was good news too! The suspense is killing me. Another great chapter, and now I am even more into it.

Grav
Grav chapter 17 . 9/7/2003
Man I love this story! Your characterizations are great. The suspense is killing me. Telling this story from everyone's POV is a great move stylistically, because it makes it liek actually watching the show. You are doing a fantastic job. I can't wait for the next installment.

Grav
gilcathlover chapter 17 . 9/7/2003
Thought I had read this fic once before, so I'm guessing that the gremlins must have deleted it or something. Anyway, I loved it the first time and I read it, and I still love it. I like the way that each chapter is told from a different character's point of view, so that I have to piece together the plot as I get new details from each character. Very unique way of storytelling! Nice job!
irish-pride03 chapter 16 . 9/7/2003
AH! I love this story! I'm so sad for Greg, and even for Vega, cuz he's still a character. But what about Nick! I'm sitting here waiting for the chapter when Nick wakes up and everything is okay! friendly WARNING: If Nick dies, I will do something. Bad. No, not really, just a hint that Nick HAS to make it, but its your story so blah.
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