|Reviews for SWKOTOR: Destiny's Pawn Book 2 Dantooine|
| Prisoner 24601 chapter 1 . 12/21/2004
I really liked the opening scene with Juhani. She is a character that gets overlooked by a lot of authors (myself included) so it is nice to see a spotlight on her here.
Another highlight was the conversation between Carth and Mission about Taris. It seems rather natural that both of them would bond a bit over this considering both of their homeworlds were destroyed the same way.
I also really liked Carth's reaction to the Jedi's cradle robbing policies. As a parent, he would have that kind of opinion I think.
Canderous and Carth taking out the rogue Mandalorians was a nice embellishment to the sidequest from the game. And while I personally don't think that the two of them could ever be friends (a mutual respect between the two of them is the most I can see), I know a lot of people disagree with me on that. Still it is a nice addition to the game story.
The main complaint that I have with this fic is the same one that I had for the last book that you wrote. I still have problems with Revan/Kairi, because she is still way too perfect. For example, Revan's entrance the first time Juhani sees her, the way Canderous compares her to a beautiful and deadly flower - she's definitely treading in Mary Sue waters here. Kairi really isn't a person, she's an ideal which makes her really hard to relate to and root for.
You don't have to make her a smart mouthed punk, by any means (in fact, I'm really glad that she isn't actually - that can get rather tiring), but she does need a flaw - several actually to make her into a human being. And being overly compassionate, which Kairi seems to be, really doesn't count as a flaw.
| Aroseb chapter 1 . 1/2/2004
Woot! Just finished - finally! Too cool my friend. Too cool. The effort you put into your story is commendable. I hope we haven't heard the last on this yet.
| Nepht chapter 7 . 12/29/2003
Book 2 is stronger than the already strong first book, especially in the fleshing out of sidequests and character development.
Kairi is the only one that's lacking slightly in development, but that's understandable considering she's essentially a "newborn". Our pasts shape who we are, and she doesn't have one at the moment, so it'll be future events that begin to define her personality.
Now that I know you're writing this, I'll definately keep a look-out for more. *G*
| athenaprime chapter 1 . 12/29/2003
Another very well-developed installment! The depth you give the characters and events really fleshes out the events of the game. I particularly liked the way you handled the various side-quests with different groups of characters, especially the Canderous-Carth interaction-very nice job of fleshing out those characters and giving them a fascinating history and depth.
I wish I could offer you some suggestion for improvement, but all I came away with was an extremely enjoyable read and the anticipation of more to come. :)
| AlmightyIshboo chapter 7 . 12/29/2003
Once again, very good _ Write more soon!
| Primad chapter 7 . 12/28/2003
This section seems to be much stronger in what I mentioned about "fleshing out" particular scenes between the characters. The Canderous/Carth interaction was particularly strong.
There is one aspect that I'm finding a bit off and that's with who Kairi is as an individual (aside: I'm guessing this is intentional and that you're adding layers to her "blank slate" as more pieces to the puzzle fall into place and that she evolves into her "own" person?) but if I'm to suspect that Revanant can be used as a guide as to where you're going with your PC's development, I don't think it should be an issue as the story moves forward.
I look forward to future updates!
| Olafur chapter 7 . 12/28/2003
And I've played the game over 3 times, and yet I keep reading your stories.
| Data chapter 7 . 12/28/2003
Looking good :)
This is a great story you are writing. I really like it. Thanks for taking the time to write it :)
| Gollo chapter 3 . 12/28/2003
Great fanfic! I realy like who you changed some of the dialogs of the game, or simply change the persons who are talking them. Keep it up!
| Bj chapter 2 . 12/28/2003
Well, this is great so far! Please continue writing.