|Reviews for With or Without You|
| maeby bluth chapter 7 . 5/27/2005
i would give myself away.. to you, because you are the hottest thing since the sun. you are on FIRE. i love you, baby.
keep on rockin in the free world, hottie.
mae (maeby) bluth
| Leigh chapter 7 . 5/14/2005
the whole ending scene i had a smile plastered on my face. that was so good its scary, 4 a second i thought it was a real episode.
| Jen chapter 1 . 6/8/2004
Super! Needs a bit of work but for a first time: very good
| 407 chapter 7 . 4/21/2004
Lalala...I have the song stuck in my head now...I'm craving music...Good story!
| MorgauseNokami chapter 1 . 2/9/2004
Gr, I hate *kicks review box aggressively* How dare it eat my review when I've almost finished typing it down! *review box snickers behind her back*
So, here we go again...
For once, I will try and be all editor-like and give a decent review instead of just saying I like it (which I do, by the way).
You've got the characterisation down. You use their voices perfectly and your wit is great. As far as I can tell, you also know your grammar and spelling.
However, by writing in this... Shakespearian way (Lu: (something), Lo: (something), etc), you are not writing a story, you are writing a script.
A story needs scenery, visuals, music, special effects. As a reader, I do not only want to know what they are saying, I also want to see their faces, here their voices, know what they are doing while saying it and how they do that. The way you write, you only tell me what they're saying, I have to make up everything else myself. And although this is a good creativity excercise, the point of writing is that it's not my imagination that's doing all the work, but yours.
I am definitely not saying this to be mean and I hope you don't take it that way. I think you have a lot of potential and seriously wish to see what you can do when you really write.
I really enjoyed reading this, otherwise I wouldn't have bothered giving you a review.
Hope this was slightly helpful :]
| a completely random person who in no way knows you at all hahaha just kidding chapter 7 . 1/5/2004
BWAHAHAHAHA! I FOUND YOU!
well, i guess it kind of helped when you told me your pen name. but whatever. anyway, now that i know where to find your postings, I CAN READ ALL OF YOUR STORIES! MWAHAHAHA! (i'm sounding a bit evil, aren't i?) well to the point: great story. ha ha love the song, didn't know YOU did. hehehe. i'm sorry. i'm just imagining the shocked faces of other readers when they read this review and think "okay, what the HECK is that random person going on about?"... but that's enough of my mindless babble.
keep up the good work. (if this were msn, i would include that little emoticon of the thumbs up. but it's not msn. so i can't. anyway.)
- if you haven't figured out who i am by now, you don't deserve to know.
p.s. ah fine. whatever. it's kate.
| LLFOREVER chapter 7 . 1/3/2004
Love that song!
| Black Lake chapter 7 . 1/2/2004
Aww, great ending!
| LLFOREVER chapter 6 . 1/2/2004
I liked it, good job. Update soon.
| Italian Feet chapter 1 . 1/2/2004
wow i cannot believe this is your first fic posted, because its awesome! you are great writer! keep up the good work!
| AstaLaila chapter 5 . 1/1/2004
How are there not reviews yet? I'm liking this story. The humour is good and the story line is pretty good too, not too far fetched, realistic. Keep writing.