Reviews for The Vespa, The Raven, And Some Romance
Foxsoul chapter 2 . 5/30/2006
screaming in laughter
shalimar chapter 2 . 9/5/2005
what in the hell is up with this chapter? i mean come on this has to be the worst thing i have ever ever ever read! if this is how it is sapposed to be then i ain't complaining!
Cambion chapter 1 . 3/28/2005
Oh yeah, great masterpiece of literary fanfiction. I'm sure you'll get an award. Seriously, it was amusing, and if you don't post the next chapters in the next month, I"LL HUNT YOU DOWN, GUT YOU, AND FEED YOU TO MY RADIOACTIVE KILLER-CHINCHILLA DEATH SQUAD!
Hoose chapter 2 . 3/28/2005
Sometimes, I like to believe that I'm Real!
LaDyPnAi chapter 2 . 3/27/2005
kaity lin chapter 2 . 12/31/2004
I'm sorry, but that was pretty bad. I didn't understand any of that.
RavenRobinfreek chapter 1 . 11/10/2004
azarathian6000 chapter 2 . 10/16/2004
yeah, yr right... the story is pathetic...
Rhonda chapter 2 . 9/3/2004
Hm... intresting... you should make it a little more clear and make Raven and B.B. fall in love soon, then it will be PERFECT! Anywayz, enjoying it so far write more soon!
takara9191 chapter 2 . 8/27/2004
i liked the fact that you mmixed flcl and tt together. it was an awsome idea!
Wildbanshee chapter 2 . 8/21/2004
we! U little psycho...
SnowballHeat16 chapter 2 . 7/30/2004
I agree with Phonograph about the whole: 'You hear slams and metal clings' and the script thing. Not trying to sound harsh or anything but I think its crap. I like FLCL and I like TT, but I dont like FLCL/TT crossover. It was a nice try at a crossover. I also agree with reifanboy (except the pope part lol)
alex chapter 1 . 7/23/2004
slayergirl1362 chapter 2 . 7/20/2004
i'm confoos'd! *whines and pouts*

(suddenly changes moods)

me want more! me want more!


*people back away*
Phonograph chapter 2 . 7/20/2004
Well, you fixed the tense problem for the most part. If I may give you some constructive criticism, you shouldn't actually write when the scene changes or any sort of "stage directions" so to speak it makes it seem more like a script than a story. Also, telling the reader directly what to "hear" is not a good idea. Instead of writing "You hear slams and metal clings." you could write "The sound of several slams and clings floated into the room." Something to that effect at least. Don't use so many "I will"'s, instead make the dialogue seem more natural by using "I'll". Anywho, you seem to be drifting away from the Furi Kuri script which is excellent. I hope you get into how the characters react to Haruko and to each other while she's staying with them. That's pretty much it. I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
29 | Page 1 2 Next »