Reviews for The Night Before Last
Heather chapter 1 . 1/24
Great one shot. Would love to see more for this series. Keep writing.
Gothic-Romantic99 chapter 1 . 4/25/2011
Good work with this story. The interactions are well done. The emotions are nicely described. Ed is an angsty character so the angst comes across as natural. It feels as though nothing is lacking. Great job.
SlaughterOtter chapter 1 . 2/7/2008
Aw... Really cute and angsty, thanks!
kayter chapter 1 . 1/22/2007
kitsuneluvuh chapter 1 . 7/8/2006
cool-kitsune chapter 1 . 11/17/2005
That was a nice story that fit my mood so much... I love the way you wrote Ed and Roy. And the part wherein Roy said that the dead will only haunt you if you allow them to is my favorite! Thanks for writing this story! Reading this sure made me feel better. _
wellduh chapter 1 . 8/24/2005
FMA lover chapter 1 . 8/14/2005
Aww... That was so sweet. I love a nice, sweet fic like this one here. Abosolutely adorable. -mwah!-
Henrika chapter 1 . 12/12/2004
Excellent character insight. Wonderful moment between those two. Keep writing!
chibiichigo320 chapter 1 . 5/30/2004
This was quite an interesting read. Very well done, and descriptive as well. Nice job.
Sol1056 chapter 1 . 3/13/2004
Oh, do keep writing for FMA. You've got the dynamics and tensions down pat, with a bit that adds to the series without straying too far. A scene, perhaps, that might have occured by just wasn't shown on screen, maybe. And I don't agree that it's necessarily yaoi - or even shonen-ai - it could just as easily be read as someone who's been there, letting his compassion show through in a rare instance.
I'm going to do a rec for your story, at ssmile, but if you want a home where you won't get buried in the slew of 's fast-moving archives, I'd love to host you. ;D
Dadaiiro chapter 1 . 3/8/2004
you almost made me cry ;_; it's a kind of dramatic, you know. but I still liked it _
Seeing the Taisa trying to help the young Alchemist, well, that's kind of rear to see. I know thata the colonel is really kind, even if he doesn't shows it openly, but you represented him very well. I liked it when he just sat there, patiently waiting for Ed to react to his staring. haha. I liked it all. this was a great fic o
Nemu chapter 1 . 3/5/2004
See... he DOES care after all. :)
Kira Seldon chapter 1 . 2/12/2004
I really enjoyed this 'fic. _ The interaction between the two is perfect, especially Roy's honesty ("do you think your brother will ever get his body back?") and Ed instantly going on the defensive about it.
Also, "the dead only haunt the living if you allow them to"? Roy, you hypocrite. _
There's a little clumsiness in some of the wording: mostly it's related to over-explanation or wordiness (the last line, for instance, would probably read better as "his limbs weren't hurting as much anymore"). I have the same problem in my writing, which is probably why I noticed it here- it'd make the story much more emotionally effective if you tightened up some of the sentences.
Also, "replied back" in the paragraph starting "For a long time Ed didn't answer" is redundant- just "replied" is enough.
You have a lot of promise as a writer- your characterization and ideas are wonderful!- and I really look forward to reading the rest of your 'fics. *heads off to check out the Naruto ones*
Placidmage chapter 1 . 2/10/2004
yay! There's a full metal alchemist section! ::dances:: I was curious to see what pairings would emerge, but I think you've convinced me of this one! _~ I'd thought of this pairing before, but I wasn't sure exactly how it would work. I was thinking Winry and Ed, but neither of them seem very interested with the other, and Ed is so averse to any idea of even tolerating Roy that it's almost comical.
I really like your portrayal of both Ed and Mustang, though. These are more of their true personalities than they ever really let most people see, and I love Ed's angsty moments. You should definitely see more, if you've only seen up to episode 10. There's a lot of evidence I'm sure you could find in the next few. _ It just keeps getting better! The manga too. Hope to be visiting this section often, and I hope this isn't a one-shot, ne?
17 | Page 1 2 Next »