never too late to finish these things... or so I've been told )

Hahaha loved the HK and T3 scene at the start. Not sure if this was written before K2... I am assuming it was, in which case I find the parallel of 2 Sith lords under another very interesting. Loved the Dodonna conversation too.
Canderous' shot to Bastila about starting to enjoy it... ooh. He's a smart man, that one.
Jailbreak! And Yuthura' s back! Great to see the crew back together again... And on the run again!

Hi,
Kosiah has recced this fix more than once to me, so I am finally trying it out. Great first chapter. I love the introduction of Yuthura and the way her and Tamar get on. And we see the new villain, a very powerful and bitter one it seems. The chase scene was brilliant.

This is a great story. I hope that you'll finish it someday. I have to admit that, aside from Revan, (I love the name you gave him, by the way. Xavious Revan! It just really fit, I think) I really liked your character Celyanda. Very interesting but also really, really, really scary. Creeped me out a lot when he/she/it/them was first introduced -in fact, it still creeps me out. But I really found it fascinating. All in all, I really love this story and hope that you'll continue it someday.

:-)

Charis

This is a review too long delayed.

This fiction, despite being incomplete, is one of the greatest I have ever read. I can say that the quality of this is equal to any SW novel and I regret that this isn't published for SW fans everywhere to read.

I hope that you continue writing because this fanfic author appreciates the devotion that went into this amazing story. Yuthura was my favorite character and this inspired me to write my own story about her.

Thank you.

"This is, without doubt, one of the more perfect things I've ever read."

Yes I tend to agree but unfortunately it does not seems to have and end. A pity.

This is, without doubt, one of the more perfect things I've ever read.

It occurred to me, that I have never left much feedback for this fic, so Ill try, starting with the first chapter.

Generally it is a nice chapter and the story flows well. I think that having the story start 8 months after the end of the game is a very smart move. It avoid being bogged down in the immediate aftermath, which I think is good, even refreshing.

The initial idea about Tamar (Revan) returning to Coruscant and offering himself for trial is interesting, but why after 8 months? Why not right after the Star Forge?

The interaction between Yuthura and Revan (Tamar) is nice, and I like the idea that she wants to help him find some peace.

Most of the remainder seem to be the confrontation with Morrigance. I suppose it works, especially with the flashbacks. I find a bit hard to believe that Sith would take lovers, though. It seem too dangerous, given that assassination seem an acceptable way of advancement within the Sith.

I particularly like your combat scenes, or rather the way they are described. Somehow you keep them interesting, never becoming dull. That is no mean feat.

However, there are no roses without thorns, as the saying goes. I do have some issues with this chapter as well.

I see that you have Revan and Bastila break apart because there was no passion. Frankly, I dont think that works given the in-game comments Bastila has about how the encounter in the Ebon Hawk was a moment of unbridled passion. Also there is the developer comments about what they intended the fade-to-black to imply, and that was much more than just kissing.

If they must breakup, I think it more likely to be a deliberate choice by Bastila. If put in a position to choose between Revan and the Jedi, I think Bastila would choose the later. Any meeting between them would still be awkward, but they might like each other a bit more.

I am left wondering why no one noticed Morrigance at the Jedi Temple. If they have surveillance footage of Revan (Tamar) being there, then why not her? Would they not have noticed the padawan leaving the Council chambers?

Good as the pursuit of Morrigance is, I cant help but think that it is perhaps a little too perfect. Though shot down, Morrigance can plant traps for Revan and Yuthura and somehow avoid detection? Somehow various police in pursuit fails to notice her, seeing only Revan? Even if she uses Force Persuade, I doubt it will work on so many as must have seen her.

Leaving chapter 1 aside, I also have some general concerns about your fic. Firstly, I think that the protagonists (Morrigance in particular) are almost too powerful, and Im left worried that an eventual showdown will be an anti-climax.

Also this fic is reminding me a bit of that old tv-show Twin Peaks. That is not necessarily a bad thing, as I rather liked it back then. However, that show had a problem, in that none of its threads ever really got resolved. That seem to happening a bit in this story as well; After these first 21 chapters, what has been resolved? Related to that is the impression that the plot is sort of running in place without really advancing the last couple of chapters.

All that aside, I hope you find the time/inspiration to finish this fic.

MORE please give me more, and soon this is a FANATISIC fic so please keep going

Apologies for the delay. The next chapter is still at least a few weeks away though. According to my plans there are four more chapters before the end

Hi,

When do think a new chapter will be up? ( Will it be the last one?)

Rgs

Jacob

excelent story

Ah, I guess I was wrong about my Celyand vs. the Catcher theory. Man, how much scary is MF with the Catcher, Celyanda, AND the Living Fleet?

Really awesome update! I can't tell you how awesome it was to see this after starting to wonder if this fic had been abandoned...lol! Thank you so much for this amazing story!

BTW, somwhere you refer to Drevon Rae as MF's former employEE. Didn't you mean employER? Or have I forgotten the details? Ah well, all the more excuse to go back and reread the earlier chapters! :-)

Do I even need to mention how good this is? That was a stupendous way to end the chapter, and of course mirrored with as many plot twists and evil devices and well, you know, incredible writing stuff. It's worth the wait for each of these chapters. Keep it coming.

Heh, I rather liked the scene of Tamar and Yuthura having "angry sex" instead of a proper conversation at first. Then finally talking and having "somewhat angry sex".

So is he really going to be able to convice the new Jedi Council with this holo recording? Even if Jolee and Bastila testify... hmm, perhaps Juhani and Belaya could testify that Master Quatra had evidence the Jedi were infiltrated/being manipulated... but wait, she never got a chance to tell them that cause she was killed. Unless there was something in Master Q's quarters to back them up, or the new council develops some brains...

Hmm, Yolanda might make an interesting testimony, though that depends on just how much she knows of Morrigance's game plan.

Guess I just have to wait to see where you are going with all this. Dammit! :)

-

Morrigance is gonna make a deal giving Yolanda and Carth both up to the Catcher so she can keep Dustil for her new Apprentice, isn't she? Or just Carth? Hm...

If it was for both, I guess that would give Yolanda a reasonable justification to stay on Carth's side and not betray him.

I think Yolanda needs another reason besides the "Omg, U soo hawt Carth!", cause honestly I couldn't see her betraying her employer. She might regret having to give Carth to Morrigance if she was ordered, but I don't think she would have refused outright... Hmm, interesting. Hope I don't have to wait another 5 months to find out! ;)

Geez, poor Carth, you have him getting beat up again, now is nose is busted too. Ouch.