Reviews for Deal |
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![]() ![]() ![]() Good story it made me laugh |
![]() ![]() ![]() Come on man... Bulma would NOT do it, just because Goku made a stupid deal. |
![]() ![]() Absolutely hilarious! Love it! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Lol |
![]() ![]() ![]() Funny! |
![]() ![]() Hilarious! You should make a Manga for this one-shot. |
![]() ![]() R.I.P. :'( |
![]() ![]() ![]() Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! This was sooooo enjoyable to read! Thanks for the excellent grammar, which most fanfiction writers don't even bother with. You nailed all the characters perfectly, with Goku's being clueless, Vegeta's being angry, and Kibeto Kai's being ashamed of his ancestor. I particularly liked the anime trademarks that you shoved in, like the hand behind the head and the nosebleed. Everyone was so in character! Awesome job! I have to post the lines that I liked most: 1. "It didn't help his case any that the tiniest of smiles kept trying to form on his face, no matter how hard he tried to make it seem like that wasn't true." I love the way you said that the smile was trying to form, not that the smile was actually forming. Perfect for Vegeta! 2. "Unfinished business?" Goku repeated, the famous Son Look of Confusion writing itself plainly across his face. HA HA HA HA HA HA! How in the world did you get that "TM" after confusion? This is so Goku! 3. He laughed, putting one hand behind his head in embarassment. Classic anime stunt! Love it! "All right!" Goku thrust one fist into the air in a victory gesture, but immediately toned it down when he realized he was getting one 'knock it off' look from Bulma, and one 'I'm going to carve out your entrails with a dull rusty knife' look. Once again, you nailed Vegeta, which is so hard to do. This was just fantastic! I wanted to see Bulma not give Elder Kai a real kiss, and I wanted to see Vegeta's punishment for Goku, and you weaved them both in. Thanks for a fun fun read! |
![]() ![]() HaHaHa! LOL! funnyiest story ever! -Thanks:) |
![]() ![]() ![]() HILARIOUS, dude! bd |
![]() ![]() ![]() Lol! This was a pretty cute little fic. XDD Everyone was wonderfully IC. You write so well. _ Old/Elder Kai is pretty funny. |
![]() ![]() Lol. That was good, and very in character to. Kick his ass Vegeta! Goku actually deserves this whoopin! Lol. Question, did Goku throw up at the end? |
![]() ![]() ![]() Hi! Nice story, and very amusing :) |
![]() ![]() ![]() lol! |
![]() ![]() ![]() You know you're doing a good job when your readers can picture the whole thing perfectly as if actually watching it on TV. _ Great job, that was hilarious! ~Goten Goku Son |