Reviews for Chiaroscuro
whatnamebutnoname chapter 1 . 2/10/2008

First of all, and before reviewing, I wanted to say that I've been eyeing your story (and the other 'confessional' writers) for... well. A long time. A year or so, I think. (I just love FFx2, and to see such a LONG fic... well... made my dreams come true. XD). But...

It's soo long. And then there's the spinoffs and the other ficsies, and.. yeah. I didn't know where to start. So I said, what the heck, the oldest one will do. So here I am.

Well. Now that THAT's done, ONTO THE REVIEW!

FFX2 is so.. fanfictionable, that this story fits in perfectly with any chronology one could make of the game. I like how you portrayed the OC Yevonites, some ambitious and unorthodox, the others actually believing what they preach... it's typical fandom (at leats in most fics I'v read) that Bevelle's all evil and what not. So yeah, that was refreshing.

I had never really thought about HOW Nooj became... the Deathseeker. He just was. So, it's a cool plotbunny there.

The writing style is just great, and I like how the chapter starts off. "Is he alive?"

LeBlanc's appearance was unexpected, whereas I got a bit lost with the other, newer charachters. Not LOST lost, just... well I had to get to know them, right?

I can't wait (but WILL have to)to read the next chapters (and the library that you and the other 'Confessional' writers have ammassed)



PS. Chiaroscuro? Where does the title come from?

PS2. I just remebered there was a website for 'the confessional'. congrats on the "about" part.
thecat-and-thefiddle chapter 10 . 2/18/2007
Um... wow! heh. I know this story is "old" but good golly gracious gosh... that... was... fawkin'... amazing! It took me three days to read it, but jee whiz! You rock! I've always been a fan of your work. x3 Long, but very intriguing. Leblanc and Nooj are a sudden favorite couple of mine since I started roleplaying FFX-2 again this past week... this was awesome. I'm sad there's no more chapters. You're a master of torture, my friend... T_T And a master of awesomenss. I salute you! *worships*
Angelwarrior1 chapter 10 . 11/12/2006
Por Que? Why'd you stop there? I must have more, please tell me you're planning to add more some day. It would be a travesty if you didn't. So angsty, so delicious! Lol (borrows Leblanc's fan and uses it) I begging for an update here! I'll even go back and review every chapter if you add more! Do it, do it, do it, do it! Okay, I'll calm down now.

Jacceh chapter 10 . 11/7/2006
I really enjoyed reading this story, it portaited the characters well. Espically how you change Leblanc's personality, it was interesting. Too bad it had to end, I was rather curious to find out what was going to happen next, netherless...well written story.
cirruscastle chapter 10 . 7/24/2005
Oh LeBlanc, keeping secrets from him and wanting to have his child. It seems likely that she's in for troubl is she continues down this road. I guess everyone has her blind spot.

Now the one part that I thought was a bit hard to swallow was when Nooj ripped her clothes off. I suppose if anyone would be the type, he would be and he is strong enough to do it, but . . . I still really wish he hadn't done it. I guess LeBlanc is the crazy type who'd find that romantic instead of creepy and annoying and weird though.

I did really enjoy the way you juxtaposed Nooj's and LeBlanc's reactions to the sex. She is naively thinking about a future as far away as having his children, while Nooj is only thinking of tomorrow.

This story has been very engaging and entertaining. I look forward to taking a look at the original version now.
cirruscastle chapter 9 . 7/24/2005
I haven't commented yet on the incredible irony of the fact that Nooj's new internal organs are designed to be *better* than the real thing and to potentially extend his life longer than is natural. This is excellently done and is simply a casual cruelty which no one except Nooj himself really seems capable of understanding.

That Nooj respects LeBlanc and worries about her opinion despite his outward prickliness is also well done. He is worried about rejection which explains his gruffness. But still I am a bit amazed at how easily he gives in to her desires. Well, I suppose he is a man after all and has desires of his own.
cirruscastle chapter 7 . 7/23/2005
I usually find it difficult to read long instrospective passages, but I find the way you examine Nooj's past and his motivations fascinating.
cirruscastle chapter 6 . 7/23/2005
Nooj's responses to his disability are touching and believable. They must be especially difficult for someone as stubborn and dependent on physical activity as Nooj is and this comes across in your writing. His response to LeBlanc was cruel, but also understandable since he feels that everyone is manipulating him or desiring something from him that he does not want to or cannot give them and she is unfortunately following that same pattern.

In the first paragraph you missed changing Anjh to Nooj once.
cirruscastle chapter 4 . 7/23/2005
Well, this chapter certainly got my blood going. I mean, I don't usually find myself all *that* sympathetic to Nooj's desire to kill himself, but I am now.

Many parts of this chapter are hard to read - but I mean this as a compliment. They are so well-written that the gruesome scenes they describe are very realistic, realistic enough to make the reader want to cringe away from them.

Whoever was exacting vindictive revenge on Nooj in his helpless state infuriated me. This is another compelling and interesting chapter.
cirruscastle chapter 3 . 7/23/2005
You write Nooj's disorientation very well. There would be, I think, a temptation to overdo it, but you allow Nooj just enough horror to stay realistic. I enjoyed the way you made the drugs more fearful than magic to Nooj.

I do feel like you made Nooj's concept of death perhaps a bit too warm and fuzzy: "the home, the womb, the comforting hearth." This is a short line, but I feel it is very important just how Nooj sees Death, since he is always straining towards it and these don't seem like things he would desire at all.

I really enjoy the way you set up the beginning of this relationship between LeBlanc and Nooj. Since he is in such extremity, I can see him turning towards her, when before he would not have given her the time of day most likely. But she would appear like an angel after the prodding and the poking and I think that in this vulnerable state even Nooj could perhaps be driven to seek the comfort she can offer - especially when she proves to be able to give him valuable information about his plight, binding him further to her in gratitude.

I really love this line of LeBlanc's, "Finally you’re flying low enough for me to reach." The metaphor about the two stage sets Nooj cannot choose between is absolutely beautiful as well.
cirruscastle chapter 2 . 7/23/2005
The first section of this chapter is a bit difficult to follow, but I respect that back story is necessary and also hard to incorporate entirely smoothly into a story.

I was going to say that Mounfar's talking to himself is a bit difficult to believe, but you rather convinced me with this, "He considered that for the moment, found it good and continued." I then got the image of someone so self-satisfied that he congratulated himself on his own cleverness. I could see this man expositing out loud.

A small thing - the change from Mounfar to Nooj would be easier to follow if there were some kind of simple dividing line on the page.

I am a bit surprised that LeBlanc is so silent. Hopefully her role becomes clearer later on because I find it very interesting.

The arguments between the various religious figures are wonderful again, contrasted with creepy Gaing's grand plans. I especially enjoyed the way in which no one is *able* to say "Deathseeker." It subtly builds up a kind of taboo around the subject that didn't exist in the game necessarily, but that makes sense and is believable.
cirruscastle chapter 1 . 7/23/2005
This is truly fascinating. I am curious about what the story used to look like before you changed it back into a tale that takes place in Spira.

The bickering of the Maesters is very well done. You seem to have a very clear picture of what religious politics might sound like.

I am intrigued by the fact that it is LeBlanc who commissioned the doctor to restore Nooj. This is an excellent first chapter that really hooks the audience's attention.
The RyRy chapter 10 . 10/8/2004
What an incredible story you tell here... I'm simply amazed by your portrayal of Nooj. You make him so deep, and with such a backstory.

Yes, you do get into a bit of an AU version of him, and I do admit that some of it I like and others of it I don't. But, then again, that's your interpretation. I don't like the idea of him being from another race altogether, but I do like how much of a warrior you've made him, and the whole story with his father. I really like the desperate personality you slip in, and the reasoning behind the relationship with LeBlanc - thank you for that.

And his sexual prowess in bed - just as I always envisioned him too. And your knowledge about the surgical procedures was amazing and believable.

The only complaint is that sometimes in... let's see, what chapters were they? Sometime in the heading you called "Chapter Three", I believe, you seem to not have edited out the substituted name for Nooj that you used. It does seem like this would be very well adaptable to a completely separate "original story" if you just changed the names. Is that what you had in mind?

Thank you for sharing your wonderful work. I'm sorry you don't have more reviews.
DarkMoon chapter 3 . 8/19/2004
I like your Leblanc very much! She came across as simply annoying and a bit slutty in the game, and in a one-sided relationship with unknown motives. Yours, however, *has* motives, and is much more intelligent and potentially dangerous than in the game. _

I'm also thrilled that someone actually likes Nooj enough to write about him, and has paid enough attention to his backstory to characterize him accurately. :D
DarkMoon chapter 1 . 8/19/2004
Finally, an intelligent, well-written FFX-2 fic! *applauds* Well done. You have impressive knowledge of the surgery that *would* have been required to save him; it makes the whole thing realistic, which is a nice change of pace. _ Off to read the rest...
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