Reviews for Beholden to Nothing
Moonclaw chapter 2 . 11/5/2005
*jumps for joy!* I love the story, your OC are great, I can see the personality in them. Also love the pics. Good story and can't wait till the next chapter. Are you going to put Taea in this story?
Yomiori-Wolfdemon chapter 1 . 4/29/2005
Grah. Why didn't I review chapter 1? It's amazing! You have a wonderful writing skill and are just as good when it comes to artwork (I love your drawings on FAC)! This has definitely got to be one of the best Jak and Daxter fanfictions I have ever read, it's long, detailed, has INCREDIBLE OCs, and you keep everyone in character! You've got such amazing talent! I beg of you to update this story soon!
Yomiori-Wolfdemon chapter 2 . 3/29/2005
KICKASSNESS! I Love this story ever so much! *glomps you* UPDATE SOON!
Lous-Me chapter 2 . 4/28/2004
(Bows down)Okay I place my self at the feet of the Master! My GOD! I checked out yur fan art on t'other site, not only do you make me a beautiful shade of emerald green with you wrtitng ability - but your art is phenomenal too! I put yer fic up there with Silent Zephyr's, for it's sheer adictive nature! MORE PLEASE!
Zane the Lazy Ass chapter 1 . 4/20/2004
Excellent! Excellent! EXCELLENT! I LUV Rayne's accent and your grammar is superb! (As what Krimzon_Yakkow said..) But just UPDATE or I'll continue to bang my head against my laptop! *BANG* You're a GREAT artist (Ur pics rock, man!) And you're a GREAT writer! Keep the good work up!
Phoenix Flower chapter 2 . 4/19/2004
Great chapter! It was very exciting, and this cliffhanger is definitely going to make me come back, just like the one at the end of chapter 1.
Yay for Torn/Ashelin fluff! This site doesn't have enough of that.
Speaking of Torn...*slaps Torn across the face* Don't you ever scare us like that again, you jerk!
TORN: *narrows his eyes and unsheaths his dagger*
*gulps* Maybe that wasn't the smartest thing for me to do. Well, 'til the next chapter, bye! *runs like the wind, Torn in hot pursuit*
DarkMistress950 chapter 2 . 4/19/2004
*squeels* CUTENESS! Aww...but poor Ashlien. And you just about put me in a seizure myself! If Torn had died, this would have been the second story in a row where that happened! AH! I would have been sad :( Anyways, keep writting... _
Krin chapter 2 . 4/19/2004
Oh! That was amazing! You've got several highly developed original characters, an interesting plot, everyone's IN character... woot! Very very cool!
All the little bits you've added in, like the Lovebird songs and her later explanation of it as it paralleled Ashelin and Torn... those are all done very well. (and Torn's ahh... well I won't put it in case people are reading reviews before the story, but the end of ch 2 was quite witty and funny to me; you know what I'm talking about)
The only thing I was lost on was Rayne's age; with her accent and behavior in the first chapter, I thought she was an older lady. (then, of course, it makes more sense later- but even when she called Vin "Uncle Vin" I thought she was an older lady using some sort of social polite code)
I didn't see any outstanding grammar/spelling errors.
Please, continue!
Krimzon-Yakkow026 chapter 2 . 4/19/2004
Wow. That was amazing, it truly was. Barely any OOC-points caught my eye, come to think of it. Ashelin definetely does have a second, softer side and you have it down perfectly. 3 Haven't seen any TxA fluff (or any Jak 2 at all for that matter) that made me squeal this much. *squeals* And finally Dharma is introduced! I honestly love her personality (bitchy-britches..nehh! I wuv it! 3) Are we gonna see any of her bad side in the future? I dunno what to expect of *that* the horror! (thats a good thing o' course ;D) I was crying when Rayne mentioned the love bird song. Crying? Bawling is more like it. '3
The only thing I can say (to round out my 'critique' as that lil review info box says 3) is that this Dradius guy has got me thinking. I take it Ashelin knows a bit about him, and he's left rather down in detail-age. But I'm 100% sure you left him that way for a reason (being the wonderful author you are D) probably because he isn't gonna be mentioned again and/or is not important I'm guessing? Otherwise, you've handled it perfectly. Great job and I'll be ansty for the next chap.!
Krimzon-Yakkow026 chapter 1 . 4/17/2004
Very nice first chapter. Your grammar is absolutely flawless, I swear, and you have the characters' personalities down very well. Rayne's accent is rather strange, but it's still to die for while reading. I don't even stumble while reading her dialogue, the way you have written it! Kudos for that, and kudos for keeping Torn in character. It wouldn't have worked if anybody else had written the situation with Jak than you, because you handled Torn's reactions extremely well. Great job and can't wait for the next chapter!
Malon1031 chapter 1 . 4/14/2004
it's a small world after all, isn't it! i just saw your artwork at Fanart Central and i must say, they're really good! I really like your drawing style, the eyes are done so well and the poses too! anyway, back to the story, i liked it. it must've been hard to do Rayne's dialect, but it fits nicely. it's nice to be able to read your story and at the same time look at a visual to put a face to the name. Very well done! Keep up the good work!
DarkMistress950 chapter 1 . 4/13/2004
Nice story! You just went straight to my author alert so you had better keep writting! I love the interaction between Torn and Jak! *purrs* lol, sorry. _" Anyways, that was really good. I really like the part where Torn told Vin he was a father! XD I could picture it in my head and laughed for about 10 minutes!
Phoenix Flower chapter 1 . 4/13/2004
I've gotta say...this ranks among the best OC fics I've ever read. You had me really worried about Jak! Rayne certainly has an interesting accent; in my head, I "hear" it as a cross between a Scottish accent and a Cockney one. Oh, and I loved the banter between Jak and Torn: "Do you think you could stop being an ass for...I don't know...five minutes?" "No can do."
I'm very interested to find out more about Rayne and Lesca, so I'm adding you to my Author Alert list. Keep up the good work.