|Reviews for Fire and Ice|
| illyrilex chapter 1 . 1/17/2008
I really wish you would continue to work on this. The characterization is great; I love how you write Tina/Terra.
| Karrey chapter 10 . 10/2/2006
This is great! Best novelization of the game I have read this far. I love how you add extra details and sceneries all the time, it gives the story more depht. Please, write more - I relize you haven't written in a while, but I'd be more than glad to see more from you on this one. :)
| Buckbeak's Revenge chapter 1 . 3/19/2006
This is - I'm bordering on heresy, here - this is even better than MikeRPG's novelization. My only complaint, and I mean my ONLY complaint, is that you might want to split up the paragraphs a bit more. Some of the paragraphs are so long, my eye naturally tends to glaze over them.
I notice you haven't updated in over a year, but if you can read this, come back. This is AWESOME. And if not, well, MikeRPG's is still damn fine.
| Agent00Latin chapter 1 . 4/26/2005
Just noticed it had been a few months since you last wrote. Do you think youll be finishing it any time soon? I hope so
| drakonlily chapter 10 . 9/26/2004
Action! Wonderfully done too. Chocobos are great things to write, so much personality. I love the way Terra thinks about them. Your attention to detail pays off when you write action scenes, particularly the city's escape. Have I mentioned that Edgar rules? Because he does.
The fight scene was well played I could see everything without you really telling me the details. This again, made me laugh, " Locke then did something very brave and very reckless. He ran toward one of the machines, still muttering expletives under his breath."
I also like the way she immediately wants to be strong and that makes Edgar and Locke concerned.
And now I have to actually wait for more chapters, I suppose your inbox could use a rest about now anyway huh?
| drakonlily chapter 9 . 9/26/2004
Not much to say with this, you are doing a good job keeping up with the actions in this chapter. I was worried it would be inner monologue heavy, but it isn't really. The way you get into the castle is nice, very cheerful without drawing Terra into it. The fact that she seems to make distance herself is a good character flaw.
I haven't read the other discussion that you alluded to in your author's note, but I felt that this one worked very well.
And the courtyard scene, I think it may have played out better if it hadn't been internalized in Edgar. I still really enjoyed the scene, and there is not a good reason to change it really, but it's easier to read actions of two parties when watching them from the outside.
And I would LOVE to see more of the Locke/Terra tension. I know he's not viewed as a serious character, but no truly believable character has no layers within them. I felt that scene was a bit off, maybe rushed, it lacked your beautiful details, maybe that’s all.
| drakonlily chapter 8 . 9/26/2004
Nice insight into Locke again on this chapter. I particularly like the way that Terra starts remembering things, being a specimen, being stared at. I also like the emotion that I feel from her when she does remember things. And I don't know if I was supposed to, but I laughed here "'Who do you think you are?" she hissed, anger simmering in her veins. It would be unacceptable – wrong – to incinerate the king where he stood, no matter how rude he was being, but surely she had every right to yell at him…"
I love the way that cowardess plays a theme with everyone in this story. Great insight to Sabin.
And I have to say it, pardon my language. Edgar kicks ass.
| drakonlily chapter 7 . 9/26/2004
Getting sick of me yet?
First, I feel obligated to say that I don't feel as if this moves slowly at all. Rushing things without letting someone get a grip on a character is a mistake you aren't making. I don't feel that this is overly word heavy. Certainly deeper a read then most fanfiction, but that is why I like it. Anything worth saying is worth saying in time and well. ƒº
I LOVE the way she sees moogles. " The creature was in many ways a strange mixture of cute and ridiculous, but he held himself with a sort of calm dignity, and Terra found herself inclined to take him seriously."
Poor Locke, I have a feeling that if a dragon stepped on him at this point he'd just be like "It figures."
This is a wonderful mix of drama and humor, with the little pokings at Locke's profession. I love how you can make something sweet without being mushy or overtly romantic, although this could easily become Locke/Terra or even a Terra/Celes if you felt so inclined. You move time swiftly during their travel, but manage to make the reader able to feel the passage of time. Another great chapter.
| drakonlily chapter 6 . 9/26/2004
Again, I like the fact that this is through Locke's eyes. Your switch from that scene to Celes and back is a bit jarring; a spacer of some sort would clear up the confusion.
You give so much to Celes' character in this story, you really do. I love the way she thinks. The whole aspect of the child Celes and the child Terra is very interesting. It almost begs a fiction of its own. In fact, I can't wait to see how they interact when not dreaming.
I don't know if I like Cid yet, but making someone dislike a character is just as hard as making someone love them. I do, however, love those moogles.
| drakonlily chapter 5 . 9/26/2004
I haven't mentioned this, but I do like the way you start each chapter. I'm not a big fan of adding in lyrics or quotes to my work, but you pull it off well. *adds another song to her download list*
Again, you draw me into your work with clarity of emotion. The whole scene in the practice field is perfect. I love the "enemies don't bleed straw" You dip into a cold façade and bring out the anger, hurt, and understanding hidden below it. The calm clarity of her mind when she battles, the subtle urges of "faster", it's all very well done.
When Cid walks in, you go into a nice inner turmoil, I would like to see more of your wonderful description, but it would perhaps weigh down what is happening.
As for your authors note, I find strength is admitting one's own weakness. The fact that self loathing is hard to overcome is something I am looking forward to reading about Celes. She's got depth to her right now. I would hate to see that change.
| drakonlily chapter 4 . 9/26/2004
Locke is just wonderful. I love his unease in the start of this chapter. I do feel that he changes his mind a bit swiftly. While his fear is still there, I don't know that such unease and hate can change into a caring emotion without any conversation. Please don't take that as a discredit, it’s a terribly small thing to pick out, something that I only thought about on my second read through.
As usual, the attention to the humanity of the characters and the condition they are in is brilliant. It's refreshing when I see so many fics that can't seem to detail appearance without being shallow or base. Like here, I love this bit:
"One of the girl’s hands was still wrapped around the pendant she wore around her neck, clutching it like a lifeline. Her fingers had not loosened, but they had slipped enough for Locke to see glints of a shimmering crimson stone which caught the warm light of the fire-globes and reflected it, seeming to glow with its own light. The girl’s other hand was flung limply across a tasseled pillow, and Locke took it in his own gloved hand, holding it tightly"
I'm really getting into this. It's a great look into the characters, not the one I had when I played the game.
| drakonlily chapter 3 . 9/26/2004
For not really feeling a character, you do wonderfully as Locke. This is the first FF6 fanfic I have ever read, and it really does a wonderful job. I like his anger; the way he feels is wonderfully summed up. He has a great attitude about it, if it weren't for the emotion, I would call it aloof.
This I suppose summed it up perfectly.
"Being a… professional… himself, Locke had little trouble recognizing that both the lock and the door itself appeared to have been forced… none too gently, either. Did the Empire… Oh, gods and espers, tell me he made it out in time. Let him be safe. Locke had never gotten along with Arvis particularly well, but that didn’t mean he had ever wished the old man any ill…"
In fact, I have nothing to say aside from I love him. Not as much as I love the moogles, however. I almost forget how much character they can have.
PS, hope you don't mind my novella reviews.
| drakonlily chapter 2 . 9/26/2004
"She was lying in a large bed, uncomfortably yielding after the stone floor she could just barely remember collapsing on, and she was twisted up in sheets that clung to her with the clammy touch of her own cold sweat. She lifted a hand to her aching head, stifling a whimper."
You have a real gift with making me feel for a character. I can picture that sort of pain easily. You also depict the fear and tenseness of the situation with great care. However, the care isn't slow. Your actions have great tempo, neither rushed nor stagnant.
Also, the desperation, yet again is brilliant. Freedom is all she really has, and therefore it is what she is willing to die for.
It's quite a task, really, to try to novelize a game. I applaud you for it.
| drakonlily chapter 1 . 9/26/2004
I'll leave out the minor errors here and there, another read through would clear those up perfectly. I will get to the plot, because I find that all the more exciting.
"… drowning might be a pleasant death, in the end, but it is death nonetheless."
I love how her own senses seem foreign to her in the beginning. It adds to a feeling of cold, desperation and pure tiredness. I also enjoy the lack of control and the isolation that you paint here. You paint realism of an unreal situation with clarity. The scene with the fire is perhaps my favorite part of this so far.
| sodapoppp chapter 10 . 8/13/2004
Hee. You modified that battle a bit... that was a weird scene, in the game. I had the ROM (oh, don't worry, I deleted it once I got bored/started dying...which was very early. Freakin' hard game, yanno?) and I think the graphics always went really screwy at that part...Terra winked or something, and Locke and Edgar...their heads become disconnected from their body.
A bit odd, really.
Innyhoo. Very nice chapter! It seemed a bit more brief than previous installments, but every bit as well-written and awesome. Kicked ass. Rocked my socks. MUY BUENO. Get the idea? You really are too hard on yourself. Every author is - and should be, it's how they self-improve their abilities, by never being satisfied - but with your level of talent, I don't think you really have anything to worry about. A'IGHT?
Hee, gysahl greens. Final Fantasy continuity; that's awesome. Edgar's a bit of a prick in here, inni? I suppose it's well-deserved - his kingdom and people and all that... love Locke's sweet caring-older-brother kind of act, because like I've said, I'm a sucker for Locke/Terra. (Celes is coming in a couple chapters from now though, I suppose. Damn!)
You need to update SO HARD. Come on. I'll send you money! (but not really) I'll send you love. Yeah, that's it. Everyone needs love! Especially from the cheapskates!
This fic teh secks.