|Reviews for Jedi Harris|
| Mastersgtjames chapter 21 . 9/9/2020
this literally borderline kills the story. Why... would he not destroy that corpse. Why bury himself. With EVERYTHING he knows.
WHY would he just ignore the lightsaber? Oh, it's dark out. guess thats a lost cause. Not like its a lightsaber, and the one I have took me months to make.
| Mastersgtjames chapter 20 . 9/9/2020
Couldn't find his lightsaber? JESUS that is stupid.
| juhiko02 chapter 24 . 8/4/2020
Amazing story the thing I don't like is that Xander is not unique with others jedi that became jedi to fast and to easy
| Lord Mortensen chapter 28 . 7/14/2020
Awesome! please update it soon!
| xKindredxSoulsx chapter 28 . 2/19/2020
I got my Padawan right! Squee! I even briefly considered Lilah who looks to be going Sith there...
And now I apologize for the book I'm about to write. I wouldn't be doing so if I hadn't enjoyed your writing so much and I want to be clear about my critic so it's more helpful:
I find the writing and character portrayal to be strong and in the proper tone for the series. I especially appreciate your Giles as I mentioned before. I also loved seeing the crossover bits with Angel, pre-Angel. Really made it feel like the world was fully existent all along and was a nice touch.
Another thing I appreciated is the way Jedi-Xander was more understanding of Angel. While it was a lot of maturity quick it actually made a lot of sense in context and was an interesting change to have them sort of get each other now.
I like the full range of AU-cannon myself(that includes full AU, cannon with a twist, and cannon with new perspectives, events or characters) when executed properly. While I've seen a some other complaints around here that I don't disagree with, the biggie for me is that this seems to be a poorly executed cannon with a twist. Aside from mixing in a little Jedi and giving us some Wolfram and Hart the biggest changes seem to be for the shiny happy(setting aside the wishworld which was a little too much. Bringing in SG-1 in such a rushed way created A LOT of exposition).
What I mean by this is you tend to take cannon plot points that "went wrong" and have Xander swoop in and "fix" them without really changing much about the overall plot or character/relationship development in the end. Not only does this leave me with a bad trite after-taste, but it means there is quite a lot of conflict removed with very little added back in. Conflict is important to move a story forwards. It also removed some key character and relationship development moments without adding back in an alternative.
One specific would be the very existence of Amy. You've kept her human and made her a Scooby(where she was merely a friend of Scooby before), yet kept her a very peripheral and unexplored character. Feels like a waste and a little unrealistic. I always felt Amy was at least a moderately powerful witch, but very impulsive, undisciplined and not particularly skilled. After all she is prone to rash unplanned showy magic that goes wrong. Also a bit of a one trick pony with that rat spell. Had she remained human I feel there would have been some regular hijinks with her magic until she matured. All we got is her stepping into a pre-existing Willow spell once and a lot of Oh-look-Amy's-here-too.
A much bigger issue for me are the changes to plot points which had a major impact in cannon and now no longer happened at all like Buffy's little test from the Council. This moment was the beginning of her split with the council, put Buffy and Giles relationship to a fire test that I believe made it stronger in the end and made them both realize just how much they meant to each other. It's a major moment. While I get changing it because it was very dark and we all wish Giles had been stronger earlier on in the process, it's important the way it was. At the very least I think an alternate needed to replace it to develop their relationship and start the break with the council.
Setting aside the lack of conflict in the story because you changed too much and not enough at the same time, there is another smaller problem I see. You have understandably made Xander a very strong, smart and wise character now. The flaw in thisbesides that it may be too much too quickis you didn't balance that with Buffy at all. While Xander is the main character here and it makes sense for him to be the hero, Buffy has become redundant and inafective as a Slayer. I feel like more balance was needed here. Letting her still have a moment(even if we didn't see it because we were with Xander) where she has defeated something big(that affects the plot) on her own or letting her at least help plan the tactics with graduation would have helped.
Overall I feel that the writing is strong, but the plot, character and relationship development was weak.
| xKindredxSoulsx chapter 13 . 2/1/2020
Throwing in my Padawan guess since I haven't finished reading yet(also haven't read comments so don't know others guessesOz and Lindsey.
| xKindredxSoulsx chapter 13 . 2/1/2020
As a note for in the future when writing in American voices: we don't call summer break "the holiday". We typically refer to summer break as summer, winter break as Christmas break or winter break, and spring break as spring break. Sometimes we'll just say the break, although usually summer is just summer to us. We usually use holdiay to refer to the actual day that is a holiday, not stretches of days. Sometimes we will call a vacation a holiday, but it's not the predominant go to term.
It's a small insignificant detail, but since I noticed I thought I'd mentioned.
Also, my compliments on your Giles. While most of your other characters are also on point, I'm more aware of Giles because I've seen a few poorly written stuttering Giles portrayals. Your Giles is spot on for the season you're in. You have him doing his nervous Giles thing just right which involves glasses cleaning and the odd repetition of a word rather than actual syllabic stuttering. And you have him doing it when he's flustered or thinking not just all the time. Not everyone gets this right.
| edenson65 chapter 28 . 9/13/2019
I must say that I thought this storyline was terrible... A Jedi in the Buffy Verse... One da I was bore and tried one of the short stories (Jedi Castle), and found that you have done a GREAT job with this storyline.
Looking forward to lots more.
| Axccel chapter 28 . 6/28/2019
On the bright side (pun!) this Darksider guy is probably very weak compared to even a Padawan since has had to figure out for himself what the Jedi and Sith have spent tens of thousands of years figuring out. On the other hand...he might be part of an order or lineage as well. Or, the Dark Side will simply help them massively along the way to get the Sith it wants like I would suspect the Light did for Oz for more Jedi. The Force always once balance, after all.
| Axccel chapter 21 . 6/27/2019
That was a nice thing they did for Faith and I'm glad you brought her deeper into the group.
Just wanna say that basically everyone in fiction gets reverse-engineering wrong. It is only possible to reverse-engineer something you already are at the technology level of or so close that the difference is little more than skin-deep. Because you would have to be to understand the technology and to figure out how it was built you would have to already have those construction capabilities. Otherwise you have no way to figure it out.
| Axccel chapter 20 . 6/27/2019
| Axccel chapter 16 . 6/27/2019
Lightsabers do not cauterize wounds, neither to blaster or laser strikes. The target’s area’s fluids explosively flash vaporize. If there are no fluids, still won’t matter because anything coming into contact with the blade, bolt, or beam will explosively flash into plasma anyway.
| Axccel chapter 12 . 6/27/2019
Jedi go kickass.
| Axccel chapter 11 . 6/27/2019
I listened to some of that soft, mournful Star Wars music while reading Xander’s cave adventure. It was touching.
| Axccel chapter 3 . 6/26/2019
Glad Xander thought it out and like the references.
A shinai woild be perfect. Looks like a bamboo lightsaber after all.