|Reviews for As A Bat|
| IchigoPudding chapter 6 . 2/20/2009
| IchigoPudding chapter 5 . 2/20/2009
Yay Harry's in slytherin!
Go Richard! WOO!
| IchigoPudding chapter 4 . 2/20/2009
So far Richard is my favourite character! WOO RICHARD! :P
| IchigoPudding chapter 3 . 2/20/2009
| IchigoPudding chapter 2 . 2/20/2009
Yay for Richard the awesome snake!
Good idea as I said I love it!
| IchigoPudding chapter 1 . 2/20/2009
This is a really good idea! Good work –gives you a cookie- I don’t care how old this is... still reviewing...
| rianifitria chapter 6 . 2/19/2009
I think the story is quite promising. A blind Harry goes to Hogwart, it's quite novel. I like the way you write it and especially from Harry's point of view.
I would like to recommend something though, to help better your writing. Try closing your eyes when you write the As a Bat sequels.
Feel the sensation of the surface of a desk, the paper, the different temperatures around the room; hear the background noise in your room, the crinkling paper, the blade of fan, the footsteps of your family members; smell the aroma of the soup, the corriander, the medicinal balm; Taste the subtle hint of spices inside your food, the dash of pepper, the dash of chilli.
It was... training for people trying to become Helen Keller in a drama. It'd help so much because right now as I read your writing I know that you can see and trying to write from the point of view of the blind and... well... failed (not so miserably).
I can tell from the way you said Harry remember the colour green from the previous chapter before the twin told him what colour is that (and how does the twin knows the colour? The darklord might use sectumsempra on him to kill for all they know, or maybe he crucioed Harry before Avadaing him.).
Give more insight to Harry's mind. I like the way you describe the magic inside Harry moved when he touched the wand. But it'd be better if you describe Harry surreptitiously caressing the wand, feeling the different texture of the wood, the curve of his wand, the length, basically just familiarising himself with it.
And about the wand... I would assume Harry used it with LEFT hand because his right would be busy holding his walking stick.
Anyway, this story is completed I know, but please, take note of the details of your future stories. Detail is what differentiate masterpiece from normal artwork.
| ObsidianEbony chapter 12 . 1/25/2009
Great ending to a great story. Having Harry use his orphan-status and blindness as a way of getting what he wants is a realy good way of showing his Slytherin side. I think what would've been nicer was if you elaborated more on Draco's and Harry's relationship (but that's just me.).
I'll go read the sequel now.
| Lady Knight Keladry chapter 12 . 1/25/2009
I like it. Harry's a good character, and I like how you added Blaise in there. However, I think you could have been slightly more original. I think there could have been different reactions to the events of first year, a different upbringing would bring different reactions from the original Harry. Like the blindness in regards to the forest scene, I don't think anyone would allow a blind kid, let alone a blind first year into the forest. Sorry, this is not a flame, I truly did like the story.
| Kynnetic chapter 12 . 12/16/2008
A truly unique, creative, and enchanting story. I have read quite a few fan fictions for the Harry Potter genre since finding FFN and I have to say, this is definitely one of my favorites so far. I am looking forward to the addition of further adventures of Harry and his accomplices in your future stories.
| wiccan-jessica chapter 12 . 12/3/2008
great work i cant wait to read the rest
| Sylvr chapter 1 . 11/10/2008
I love this story! Applause. I just finished it, and was on my way to your bio when I remembered I wanted to congratulate you on a story well done. Great job! I really like your Slytherin Harry, but it seems to me that he's not much of a friend to Hagrid-that whenever he talks to him, it's just to ge information, never to chat.
| Sylvr chapter 8 . 11/10/2008
I luv this story!
Good job, keep it up!
| dawnstar28 chapter 5 . 10/26/2008
hm...i know the site has been acting up recently in some aspects, and i don't know if this is to be on that accordance, but...this chapter seems to be missing. whether or not it is just my accessing of the story, all i can see is a small white space for the story. almost as if it had been deleted. just thought that i would let you know! its been a lovely story so far!
| Makurayami Ookami chapter 12 . 9/18/2008
11-well written. This was good.
12-this was awesome. A very well written story. I’ll have to add to my C2.