|Reviews for Less Than Human: Harpuia's story|
| MungoJerry chapter 1 . 12/2/2007
I hear this is dead? Ah, well, I'll read some anyway. Fun flow, kind of strange. *sniffs* But is that a Mary Sue I smell..?
| M.Hunter Traubel Trainee chapter 1 . 11/3/2007
Ah, it has been a very long time since I have read this fic. I'm only now just rereading it, and already I begin to remember the excellent quality of this fic!
This is an excellent piece of fiction. I may have only read the 1st chapter, but already I see that the portrayal is very accurate and realistic. I can't wait to read through the next parts again and refresh my memory.
Harpuia is one of my favorite characters from the Megaman universe, partly because he's wind element (fav. element) and he develops to become VERY similar to X (the real X, who is my favorite character in the MM series). I'm writing a fic myself on him, but it still needs some time to fully develop to your level (and it features a rather...interesting pairing.)
Anyway, EXCELLENT WORK! I look forward to reading the newer installments when they come in!
| Ginkyofu13 chapter 17 . 11/9/2006
| Mahado chapter 17 . 5/20/2006
Such a great fanfiction! So perfect, full of tension (your really a master in that case *_*) and such brilliant battlescenes! Well...as I read the first chapter i wasnt to much impressed of it. Especially of Mayu (normally I dislike ffs with new Charackters in the beginning) but when I read on I began to love the story! And Mayu as well! I like her charackter and im telling you...I was pretty sure that she was a human (because a human sticks to Harpuia as a "girlfriend" *lol* anyways..Lev and Harp is a nice combination, too.)
I love the way you discribes Fefnir *g* He really the "clown of the class", alsways giving stupid comments and having a graet battlespirit!
Li is a nice elf,too. I never thought there exist a person (okay..fefnir a s well) that can go such on Harpys nerves X3
But...how can you stop here? so many questions are still not anwsered! Mayus real reasion of fighting? her feelings to Harpuia? Does she loves him or not? Is she helping the Resistance as well? What is Lis secrect functition as a hacker? that is the secret of the Resistance? And what about Elpizo and Zero? Why was Zero that "bad"?
Maybe you will continue someday? Or wrote a new story with our favorite MMZ charackter?
aw yes...i like your pics on deviant art. there are pretty nice maybe i will draw you a thank you pici for that great story (but im not so talented as you)
hope to see you again
P.S: Sorry for teh bad grammer but Im just a small german Harpy-fangirl
| angelus888 chapter 8 . 2/9/2006
Well, that was truly an image-filled read. You did a great job describing the battle scene Ri - great job! I'm serious! Considering I've never played the game, the way you write actually helps me visualize the scenes clearly. :D
In terms of writing: grammer, spelling, and format are fine. There is only one mistake that I caught and it is in the last couple of lines ("m*a*y armpits"?). Other than that, I did not find a single mistake - I was too caught up with reading you depiction of the battle - I found myself visualizing more than reading (which is a good thing XD)
Great job! :D
| angelus888 chapter 7 . 1/1/2006
Happy New Year, Ri! Sorry I haven't been reading this thing for a while *dodges rock* - I had a lot of stuff to worry about, aside from my writings.
So anyways, about this chapter: Very good - I can definitely see you love action scenes, and you describe them very well. Blood, guts, flying bodies - the whole shebang. XD Spelling and grammer - I didn't find anything wrong. I didn't see and format problems either. So well done!
| angelus888 chapter 6 . 10/29/2005
Again good chapter. Dialogue is good, as usual. There were a just a few format problems (like, I suppose, where italics weren't suppose to be). Personally, I thought Mayu and Sage made up a little too quickly, considering the fact that she was unable to inform him of the attack, which - in turn - caused a lot of damage and casualties. But other then that, everything was fine! Good job! *thumbs up*
| Aria6 chapter 17 . 10/21/2005
Wow... this is an AWESOME fic. XDD I really want to see more. Keep it up!
| angelus888 chapter 5 . 10/5/2005
Well, that chapter was alright - well done. I just think the only problem you might have is the order of your words - the few problems I saw here and there didn't cause confusion and were able to their points across; it's just that it sounds a little awkward. For example, when Sage is talking to Leviathan about Mayu, he says “She doesn’t much like fighting anyway”. To me, that sounds a bit strange. Had he said, "She doesn't like fighting much anyways" it would've sounded better(IMO, of course). Just keep an eye out for those little problems here and there, and keep up the good work! :D
| Logan Roderic Arc-Gustav III chapter 17 . 10/2/2005
Got to love Fefnir. The Crimson warlord as you put it. I really enjoyed this chapter. I love the way you portray the little quarks that some characters have in the battle. Harpuia's little smile and Fefnir being well... Fefnir. Your battle sceens never cease to amaze me. I enjoy your Maverick designs and everything in between. Great job.
| JimVan chapter 17 . 9/25/2005
Again, great work Ri! Sorry this review's so late. Er, it's situation-wise, you understand. Great chapter. The detail was beautiful, and you mashed tension and feeling into the words perfectly. Really great stuff. Heh, Li finally turned up again, much to Harpy-boy's continued chagrin, I'm sure. Fefnir is playing the classic 'dopey voice of logic' role here. Stroke of genius. Ouch, I hope Leviathan's okay. Keep up the good work, Ri! You're a real inspiration.
Your no. 1 fan,
| angelus888 chapter 4 . 9/21/2005
Well, that chapter ended nicely. Although I do not know much about the MegaMan series, I liked the drama segments throughout the chapter, especially the argument Mayu and Sage had concerning what it means to be human and what are the beliefs that both of them are fighting for. Character interaction and philosophical drama are most definitely your strong points! Keep it up! :D
| angelus888 chapter 3 . 9/21/2005
Again, nicely written. I most definitely like the light humor with Fenfir trying to break into the force field, and the additional sexual tension with the teasing between Sage and Mayu (especially the "And please don't refer to her as my girl-friend." thing XD). I am beginning to notice that you rely a lot of your plot to be played out through dialogue and character interactions... I really should learn to do that; it makes the story easy to follow, simple, and clean - which I most definitely like. :D Keep up the good work! Onto the next chapter! o
| PrincessZidet chapter 17 . 9/19/2005
Ri your battles are so detailed it makes me want to .. sing! _ I think I will *sings* Well anyways, keep going! you know I will cry if you dont'. I hope Levi will be ok. And Fefnir is so cute in a big guy kind of way. P-Poor Sage! *throws the paperwork somewhere and hugs him* Harpuia-kun whee! *cough* a-anyways. keep going Ri! *huggles*
| Lynet Nar chapter 17 . 9/18/2005
I hadn't realized how much I missed reading this until you updated. Now I'm going to have to go back and read the other chapters while I wait for the next one. Very good job, as always, and Fefnir's the hero of the battle! Yay! _
I thoroughly enjoyed this chapter especially. I think battle with lots of dialogue is what I like best, though the rest of it is good, too. I've noticed people commenting on the length of your chapters (either too short or "yay this is longer") but honestly, I don't notice the length: it's that good. No matter how long the chapter is, it always feels too short.
The highlights of this chapter, I think, are Fef 'n' Levi's banter, of course, Arcan with the coms, "Mr. Master" and Pinacle Rock.
One thing that didn't make a whole lot of sense... Something Sage said... "'I don’t think that sacrificing their own men-'... 'Or women,' I concluded." Did you leave out part of his sentence, or didn't he finish his thought? Whatever. That was just a little blip on an otherwise wonderfull chapter.