Reviews for Whispers and Lies
Elven Silver Power Ranger chapter 14 . 5/17/2013
please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please update soon! this story rocks!
LuluCalliope chapter 4 . 7/21/2012
All right! Scroop was always my favorite character, and I loved the confrontation scene in the movie. It's really good here!
saywhatlittlemiss725 chapter 11 . 6/1/2011
WHAT THE F***? JACENO IS EVIL? what the who where when what? WHAT THE F*** just so unexpected and just wow! AWESOME STORY!
disneyhugefan chapter 14 . 3/31/2011
this is amazing i can't wait for the next chapter :)
Crown of Holly chapter 1 . 2/1/2011
I think this definitely needs some work.

I will be blunt and honest about everything I say here, because I may as well just say it up front- I might possible be or sound quite mean. You really might not like what I have to say, but I think this kind of review will help you the most.

Plot wise and character wise this desperately piece needs work.

I don't mind the 'fall into another world' plot that your oc's go through. I actually tend to really enjoy them no matter how cut and dry they are, but my enjoyment of them really depend on their execution. Which you kind of failed on.

You wrote it as, “Lol green light. -and then, OH WOW WAKING UP IN NEW WORLD WITH HEADACHE. OH, BUT I MADE A WISH. SO DID MY BROTHER! ALL COOL."

Your characters have the potential, but their backgrounds are extremely over used and something akin to being either emotionally blank or bipolar. That's how diverse their behavior is. I just can't tell which direction they're going. Sure you give them exclamation point's when they speak certain things, and you give them that same old dry anger when they are irritated or insulted, but it's just- meh.

I don't feel it.

It really makes me feel as a reader that your character's are the same old same old. There is nothing that makes me care for them, and yes, I feel that way even though Cassie was apparently raped by her father, beaten, and verbally abused..

I couldn't care less about her family situation by the way you wrote it.

The way you initially told her story of being raped was, yes blunt, and very shocking. It's supposed to be that way when you tell someone news like that. But after just meeting Jim, Cassie already tells him that kind of info?

If I told a guy, "I was raped a lot by my father, when I was like 13. He really hurt me sometimes too and destroyed my stuff and yelled at me and called me names. Man, step dads suck don't they?"

I would get looked at funny and that guy would walk away and probably hope to never see me again.

When I read the paragraph of Cassie telling Jim that she was raped I said out loud, 'Wait LOL what?' because Cassie and her brother never seemed the type of children who were put under that kind of stress in the story. What was it, Chapter 6 when Cassie tells Jim? I didn't think she had that kind of past in all honesty with the way she acted.

And afterward, you played it off as a regular occurrence and that is actually quite insulting. I know Cassie has to deal with her past, but I sincerely DOUBT her behavior would actually be that way when she has "gone through" so much in her life.

It makes me wonder about girls reading this who HAVE been through the trauma of being RAPED and yelled at senselessly, and I cannot fathom how they must feel to read about a character like Cassie who just says, "how about I was raped like, 20 times-"

And he brother is just, “I love you Cassie, the nightmare's will end okay?”

My face just went into a “:I” And then Jim was just like, “Oh- well..You wanna go to bed?”

:O

Oh come on! RIGHT after Cassie tells him she was raped?

Put yourself in Cassie's situation, as a PERSON Cassie just does not add up. 2 2 has to equal 4. Always.

So when you've been raped like Cassie and abused and shouted at- she can't just be all, "Urgh, I don't want to talk about it." -INSERT ANGRY TONE AND CASSIE'S GRR FACE-

Psychologically, Cassie would be messed up, and so would her brother. They'd have problems. And issues, and certain topics would be awkward with each other.

It IS charming how her bro cares for Cassie like that, but you should have expanded it more! They're there for each other, we get it, but really show evidence, give a flash back that's not cheesy. Give a foreshadowing and scenes that will really make someone cry from all “the deep emotion that Cassie shares with her brother.”

On top of all that, it would be nice if you described where your characters are. What's the environment like, is it hot? Cold? What does it remind your characters of? Stuff like that helps a reader immerse themselves in a story and really ENJOY it!

Good. Day.

-Shiori
prittymiddy chapter 14 . 9/19/2010
dont quit now your in the home stretch! keep going! pleeeaaasssee update!
me chapter 14 . 9/6/2010
janna, its been more than a year. i think me and a whole bunch of other readers would really appreciate it if you wrote the next chapter soon.!
StarSpinner678 chapter 14 . 8/24/2010
omg this is an awesome story! plz continue!
BakaSatsumi chapter 14 . 7/31/2010
I really love this story! I actually only watched the movie the day before I started reading the story. Please update I'm really looking forward to it!
aMY chapter 14 . 5/29/2010
MAKE NEXT CHAPTER NOW!1
AN chapter 14 . 4/27/2010
If he was my brother and he did that to me I would hurt him so bad it wouldn't be funny and he asks what I would have done if that happened to me I would rather die then betray my family members.
dose not make scence lol can't spell
halaki chapter 14 . 3/4/2010
i have read every single one of your stories. they are brilliant! when is the next ne coming out?
Wherever Girl chapter 1 . 12/30/2009
What happened? You had a great story going and then you... stopped. :( Please continue your story, please?
Wherever Girl chapter 14 . 10/17/2009
I am pretty much in love with this story right now! I'll give you 2 reasons to keep writing: #1 I'm a huge Treasure Planet Fan, and #2 I want to find out what Jace said to Cassie!

I also noticed that Jace's age went from 17 (the first chapter) to 18 (the second or third chapter).

Also, their stepdad is a real deusche. May he be sucked into a black hole!

:)
Baltosbabygirl chapter 14 . 8/6/2009
Please update! I love your fanfics!

-Saba
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