|Reviews for Change|
| shesamonster chapter 3 . 5/29/2005
Update soon please. I don't stand for hiatuses. Its really getting interesting and I saw DarkenedSakura's review so if you need a betta, you could email me. My email address is on my bio page. Ciao!
| shesamonster chapter 2 . 5/29/2005
I read this in December and I still haven't updated...I'm a dummy. I feel sorry for Doujima. Love troubles, not pretty, Iknow out of experience. I love the love triangle, too!
| Animated Flowers chapter 3 . 9/3/2004
hiya... good plot its very interesting i cant wait for more! )
| Moriann chapter 3 . 9/3/2004
Geez, I thought you were not going to write the next chapter at all. I'm glad I was wrong. ;)
It looks promising - your stories usually have a good plot and this doesn't seem to be an exception. I only hope that writing other fics won't distract you too much from this story...
| Eve Griffin chapter 3 . 9/2/2004
You have a very good way with plot and story development. I enjoyed your other WHR stories very much and I believe that you have improved.
One thing you could work on is character development. I would really like to know more about the new guys, Daisuke and Sheila.
| MusiqMistress chapter 3 . 9/2/2004
Yey~! You updated FINALLY! Anyways, great chapter, I loved all that action that you put into it. And that's why I love your stories... just so... *gasp* and "Wow..." Hope you can udate SOONER and not LATER this time, n'k? ~Musiq
| ou812 chapter 1 . 7/29/2004
your going to do more right? please do, i love robin/mike fics. loved your others fics too. SO KEEP ON WRITING !
| Haein chapter 1 . 7/29/2004
I didn't even intend to review this story (sorry, but I'm usually pretty apathetic about that kind of thing), until I happened to read some of the other reviews for it.
Your story is the coolest thing to hit , you are a god, blah, blah, etc.
You are an idiot and have no grasp of grammar. You are repetitive. You suck. I hate you, and believe you should never write again.
GEEZ, IS THERE NO REASONABLE MEDIUM?
So, I feel compelled to provide my own honest opinon of this story:
Your grammar is not stellar, but it's a damn sight better than some writers' . All you need is a good beta reader to catch some of your glitches, OK? I think you have a pretty decent writing style, and your original characters don't bore me to death. So far the "replacement" members of STN-J are more like cardboard ciphers than real people to me, but I figure you're planning to go into detail about their personalities and histories later on (hopefully). Actually that's pretty much my only issue with your story so far. You don't give much depth!
And I'll end this review right now, before it gets too ungodly long and rambling. Sorry if I may have come off pretentious or anything... got stuck in English class critique mode. ;)
| Moriann chapter 2 . 7/22/2004
Just two chapters and I'm already hooked on... I hope this story will be as awesome as your previos ones. And Mrs. Kinoto's return truly made my day - you've got a knack of creating really great original characters and she's my favourite.
This story has only one drawback - there are surprisingly many grammatical and spelling errors throughout the text. Get a beta reader. ASAP.
| KB Twilight chapter 2 . 7/20/2004
Oh... I like it. I also like all of the references. Very nicely written, as usual.
By the way, yes I will go finish reading Falsh Echos, I just haven't had much of an Attention Span lately, and I have Marching Band Practice.
One more thing then I'll leave you alone. Did you give up on your message board? I made you an offer on it a few weeks ago, I don't know if you want to take me up on that or not, it's up to you.
| Neko-Yuff16 chapter 2 . 7/18/2004
this is gonna be a MR, right? not MD? i hope MR, cuz theyre so cute together! _ update soon! great story!
| Thanatopsis chapter 2 . 7/18/2004
I've read some of your other fics and have been really impressed with what I've read. This story is excellent so far. I love the way you are putting the characters and how you got rid of Michael's ponytail. I didn't care too much for the ponytail, though other characters in other shows can like Yoji from Weiss Kreuz. Anyway, sorry for getting off topic a bit, I'll be looking forward to the next chapter. You've snagged my interest. I hope Robin and Michael get back together.
~Narya Silver Fox
| Brandon Rice chapter 1 . 7/16/2004
Just trying to get to my new profile page...
| Ninja Katana chapter 1 . 7/15/2004
"Now, as tradition states, this is where I beg you to review because I’m a feedback hog and simply must have reviews."
Here you go, lovey...
Dear Golden"The Amazing Brando"-sama,
Hello, how are you? I'm terrible, thanks for asking. My eyes are bleeding. How did this happen, you ask? Well, funny thing. I just finished reading chapter one of your new fic, "Change".
I don't have the energy to be saccharine, anymore. Now I'm just exhausted. I've tried and I've tried to think of ways to help you improve, and I can't think of any. Would you even listen? If I told you where to fix your story, would you even take heed of my words? Or would you dismiss me as a "flamer" and go about your merry way, satisfying the hoardes of illiterate fangirls who just don't have any standards?
I don't know, and I don't think I care, overmuch. This is a bit cathartic for me, so I'll write the bloody review, anyway. Hmm, where to begin? I find that's always the hardest part of writing a review for you. There's just so much to address.
Maybe...okay. I don't know if anyone has ever told you this before, but you really enjoy stating the obvious, don't you? I mean, I know you're writing for those dumb fangirls, but still. Give the rest of us a bit of fucking credit. Here's a couple of formidable quotes from your story:
-A large black tunnel. The kind made for cars to pass under bridges.
-See, here he was sliced with a knife made for chopping
-Instead he was sitting against the wall of the tunnel typing away on a miniature laptop that sat in his lap
| DarkenedSakura chapter 2 . 7/15/2004
Well, Mr. Amazing Brando, let's talk about your new fic.
No offense, but...You Need A Beta. You really do, for when you have things like "Michael quickly typed fasted" which not only is an error of spelling but a structure error as well, you need to fix them (especially if you can't catch them, which seems to be the case). I can pick out at least 5 of these kinds of errors in this chapter, and that's not counting the awkward phrases/paragraphs such as "Doujima and Daisuke -retracted- to the walls but Sakaki wasn’t so lucky. He used his craft to try to stop the bed but he only slowed it down and the mattress hit him in the face. While it was on the mattress, it did send him tumbling backwards where he hit the wall behind him and banged his head painfully." Run ons, lack of commas (or an excessive use of them), and just weird, weird ways of using words...
And no offense, but I don't think you did the whole "Doujima loves Michael" thing well. There wasn't any development, and I'm not just gonna believe that, even if it was 5 years.
While there were a few good things, the rest of it just... Please get a beta. Good luck!