|Reviews for Artistic Differences|
| avearia chapter 14 . 8/1/2006
Nice Chap. Of course, It always is. Here, let's skip the normal introductory paragraph and plunge head first into the review.
Hah! well, several things caught my funny bone. Tai's the inventor of the tux? Well, Matt IS the inventor of dating, so you have to give the other boy SOME credit, I guess. He'd so be the kind to do that.
On top of that, the 02 season makes their debut. I mean, Cody was mentioned, but only once and then he was forgotten. I really don't think I was expecting that. And of course, I wasn't expecting Jun to be there either. It would've been great, in my opinion, to give the beautiful Sora a little competition. you give Matt the anger and jealosy of a lover but not sora? She's really missing out on big things. like revenge.
I also thought it was hilarious. "HE'S TAKEN!" and Yolei's reation... "Is that what you meant when you said he was taken...?"
But the mood suddenly turns evil as they're attacked in the ballroom! Ok, you did this part pretty well. I think the conversation between Matt and the rest of the people was very well thought out. it was very well paced and the parts all added to the drama.
One thing I was thinking about was if Marcus was a bit more... well, inconspicuous. It would totally have added to the drama... Matt not liking Marcus for no appearant reason, and everyone else sort of liking him but having their doubts. that would've made Marcus's accusation much more shocking, and disturbing. You lead them into thinking Marcus is a good guy and then he turns on everyone. Plus, it would dramatize even the little things, like his 'explination' of girls in the earlier chapter. someone's walking along (like sora, for instance,) and they hear the good-ol'-Marcus-of-lockton saying something as evil as that. Keep it in mind if you ever do a similar story.
I'm not even going to guess who was at Sora's balcony. It's either pretty obvious or really shocking. congratz, this is the best chapter yet!
| avearia chapter 13 . 7/26/2006
and I'm back! wow, I really liked this chapter. and on top of that, I'm over halfway done now! I don't know whether that's a good thing or a bad thing...
Alright, here's your critisizm for chapter 13.
at first, I noticed you spread out several of the paragraphs that were all about Marcus. I have no problem with that, but It seems that it would be better to have left them in tact, seeing how they're all about basically the same thing. Also, you didn't lable much of the dialogue between Tk and Matt, and although it was the same two people talking, it just caught my eye as a bit strange. Usually, I reserve that sort of style for quick, short lines between people; 'yes you do' 'no I don't.' 'ya huh' 'nu uh...' you know, because in short speaking parts, it flows better that way.
the harmonica thing also seemed abrupt. I think you should've possibly split the two sides of the sentance up, so that it would seem more as an afterthought for Matt to ask his bro if he's seen the instrument. That's really all I have to say about that.
I do like how Matt said "we'll stay out of your way.". It sort of goes along with the theme you've been building up, about how the social status issue affects Matt's thinking. And of course the king would offer to buy the outfits for them. Matt's probably going to go for something cheaper, because he doesn't feel right about using someone else's money. that's just my prediction, anyway.
You know, I totally forgot about Matt being king if he marries Sora. Completely. I can really relate to Matt on that point. It's rather funny, actually. I want to see how THAT issue turns out.
Did Matt oversleep? When Tai first entered his room, I was under the impression that it was dark out. Maybe that's just in my mind... And I see you did bring up the 'shopping!' thing again. It's really cute. is that really all Mimi thinks about? oh well. But what I don't get is that Matt vollenteered Marcus to carry her bags... doesn't that seem a touch rude? it does to me. but funny. (giggles) ten bags is alot.
Speaking of clothes, I wonder what that first outfit looked like. is Marcus a heavyset man, or why wouldn't he be able to fit into it? I'm hoping to see what the second out fit looked like.
I sure hope Matt's surprizing Sora with a proposal. I think the whole 'talking to the king' was some sort of foreshadowing to that. I'm glad she won't marry marcus, because Marcus is a jerk. JErKY FOr SaeL! I'm happy you nearly killed him. But hey, when you write, you are your kingdom's god. Sweet, huh?
now that I've written something longer than usual, I'll probably have to stop. Good luck with your future writings!
| LegolasGirl25 chapter 25 . 7/22/2006
oh my goodness...what a brilliant story! It was so sweet, funny, exciting, and surprising! I enjoyed reading the story with all the Digidestined in it! Tai was by far one of my favorite characters...This story was so well written and I loved it from start to finish! Great job with this story, I can't wait to read your other stories!
| avearia chapter 12 . 6/26/2006
Well, it was only a matter of time before goody good wah-my-daddy-doesn't-love-me-as-much-as-him marcus showed up. Oh well. Now that Joe's met Matt, The only one left is Izzy. I'm glad you inserted him... after all, he's a major part of the Digidestined story. I wonder how he'll come into play?
Well, more happens. So far, Marcus seems a bit flat, like his sole reason for living is to kill Matt. I wonder if there's any truth to his story? and if he got hit by those arrows, how'd he make it to Matt and Sora's horses before them? Maybe he has magical transporting powers.
So, the chapter ends with Marcus ticked and Matt seething. I wonder if Sora's suspicious of him or not? I'm not so sure I would be, after all... she doesn't know him very well. then again, she has heard Matt's story. who knows.
The Tai/Matt thing was cute. I'm glad Tai isn't such an idiot he wouldn't figure out what Matt said. It's kind of weird that Tai would arrive to the conclusion of 'everyone accepts it' before Matt did, though. and I did like his monologue version of the happily ever after story... It sounds alot like what your reviewers would say. "they accept it, the others accept it, I accept it, sora accepts it. Tada! everyone accepts it and we can all live happily ever after the end!"
Anyway, Great story, for the eleventh time. I think I have to take a break, but I'll be looking forward to chapter 13.
| avearia chapter 11 . 6/26/2006
Ok, now things are starting to heat up. Romance shmomance, I want action!
Well, the arrows were deffinately strange... I wasn't expecting that. and I wonder who the guy is? Certainly it isn't someone we know, but Matt knows him... ah, getting confused.
Ok, what's this about Matt needing to tell Sora how he really feels? sure, he could proclaim his love to her, and that's how he really feels, but... They nearly went into intercourse! Don't they know that they're in love already?
Um... sorry. It's just a bit wierd to me, that's all.
Now, I did like the 'plans' you did so far, 'get-them-both-into-the-kitchen-and-lock-them-in' plan was the best. I also love the irony that the boys and girls both formed a plan and said it exactly the same day.
Hm... I wonder... with all the planning, did any of the rooms get done? hm...
Again, some problems with the punctuation, but I'm pretty sure we've cleared that as a 'well, these things happen' problem. what I don't get is how they got out... I was expecting them to take the rope ladder. I mean, I'm sure I'd notice if someone was crawling beneath me. oh well.
This chapter was pretty fun and exciting, and overall I liked it.
this review is TBC- to be continued...
| avearia chapter 10 . 6/26/2006
Hey! I'm not dead!
Um... sorry. I was kinda busy lately. but now I think I've got everything in order. so... I'll pick up my reviewing again...
wow, there sure was alot of kissing this chapter. aside from that, I think the whole 'matchmaker' thing was kinda cute. I, of course, was seeing this from the very beginning, but wasn't getting the whole picture... aka, Everyone, instead of just Tk and Kari.
I think the best part of this chapter was the Tai getting married part. I think he'd make a fun but weird father... and I kind of liked his vision. 'there will be an army of tais!' and Tk's thought 'sweet jesus, no!'. Well, best part in my opinion, anyway. I'm trying to imagine a queen in painting clothes... I'm making progress. I liked the enthusiasm of the royal couple, too.
Well, Nothing bad this chapter, except it was a bit abrupt from one thing to another. That's ok, so, Good chap.
| crest of music chapter 25 . 5/28/2006
I love this story like I love all your other stories! I loved the ending its so funny!
| avearia chapter 9 . 1/26/2006
Heh, sorry about the wait. I kind of got grounded. anyway...
Another great installment. I liked this chapter; it was really funny and actually went somewhere. I thought that they admitted their feelings (sora and matt) last chapter, though! isn't that what the kiss implied? ::so confused::
There were hardly any grammer or spelling mistakes here, either. I think you should have made Sora give Matt a mustache or something. Or showing the reaction of Kari and Tk, or the parents when they saw their kids covered in paint. that would have been funny! The best part, in my opinion, would have to be when Kari and Tk told each other about Sora and Matt. "What?" heheh..
Great chapter! Off to more...
| A Hopeless Romantic chapter 25 . 1/24/2006
I wanted congratulate u on a magnificently written masterpiece. You should be very proud of yourself. And congrats on getting 500 reviews!
Your stories are all graet. I was wondering if u would introduce some new stories now that Artisitic Differances, To the Highest Bidder, and The Game of Life are all finished? Anyway, hope u had a merry christmas and a happy new year, hope to get an update from u soon.
| avearia chapter 8 . 1/18/2006
R/N: Reviewer's note: Glad I could finish another chapter! so good... so good... ok, now, after six reviews (was it six?) you know what I'm here for. mockery and praise. So let's just get right to the point, yes?
Bad points: It pains me to say it, but yes, this chapter bugged me a touch. what rubbed me the wrong way?
first: pointlessness. the non-funny kind. I don't see what you accomplished by having Matt and Sora go to look for their friends, (and in such a short explination, too!) and needing to describe it if they didn't find them.
Secondly, *god, Does it sound Like I'm being harsh? I don't mean that!* The choppyness. the arrow comes down, they're suddenly together, they talk, king bestows matt with a dagger, explain situation, leave to look for friends... ect. I'm sorry, but it was sort of strange not hearing transitions between these.
Third: I don't get the moving of the ball thing. What did it accomplish? (this is a minor point, but it confuses me.) I just don't get it.
Now, good points are Good to hear. : girl and guy action! please note, I'm not a perv. I'm just saying... FINALLY! It IS a sorato, this is what I came for! ...
Drama. OOh, the drama. who doesn't love that? Comidies. but... it's the drama of life that created comidies. so, they shouldn't complain.
Sora and Matt have finally reached an agreement about their feelings, including their own and each others. It's sometimes confusing when they go on with a love story and no one knows if the feeling is 'true'. OF COURSE IT IS! THAT'S THE AUTHOR'S INTENT! um...
"Sora coughed at Tai's explination. Yeah RIGHT!" -hm... hehee... Dunno. I always think about coughing when I know someone is blatantly *Lying*. I like the fact that Tai would be scared of Sora's wiggling fingers as well. it's the universal sign for MAGIC! boo! um... !
Dun dun DUN! Tai comes to a realization. "Oh, you and Matt!" "You're a bad, bad liar, Sora!" Sora's explination was so weak that even TAI saw it. how embarassing. I have a feeling Kari and Tk are going to play matchmaker.
Oh, I noticed you've got 500 reviews now. What? stop lookng at me like that! I didn't... um... Never mind. I'm going to keep on reviewing, so THERE! *Sticks toungue out*
| avearia chapter 7 . 1/17/2006
ARG! What kind of ending is that, to a chapter? You must have had a ton of flames from your fans when you wrote that. Um... Oh, by the way, Hiya. Sorry for the delay, but between my sister, mother, and the not-so-in-tact powerlines, I was forced to stall for a day, and then Somehow I got sidetracked by a danny phantom fanfiction. Now that I've finally read that (God, it's chapters were so long... ) I'm ready to begin on my quest again. but how the heck am I going to make it through 25 chapters? this is impossible. Oh, and thanks for the replies. now...
Chapter analysis: Two main problems with this chapter: Repitition and redundancy. um... and commas. but that's not new... You can't exactly do that often. OOh, OOH, I have a prediction for next chapter! they're going to get interrupted! after all, no one ends a chapter there if they don't kiss. XD
"he didn't call me bushy. I am good!" - I thought, after first reading this, that he'd said "I am god." oops. I seem to be having trouble with this misreading thing. of course, the following "That's the way uh huh uh huh I like it uh huh uh huh... " just topped it. so...
You know, I always considered Matt a Winter baby. oh well. I guess you have your reasons. I also noticed some 'foreshadowing' on Lockton something-or-another is on the move. . . I don't think it was dramatic enough, but That's just me.
Good chapter! I'll be getting to the other ones now. Toodles!
| avearia chapter 6 . 1/13/2006
I was curious and read the other reviews. I'm happy I'm not the only one who's done continuous reviews. Yay for that! now, reviewing as I go...
So far, this is what I've noticed: Matt still calls Tai bushy. I wonder... Does he even know tai's real name? I wonder... I really do wonder...
Vendor. I'm an idiot. I thought of 'vendor' like a snack vendor. Gosh... I'm hungry. anyway, I didn't realise you meant 'human vendor' until Tai said Mimi was flirting with it. ... him. sorry.
Oh, sora's ticked. "Taichi Kamiya!"
I think it's subtly funny that Tai's the only one who's oblivious. anyhoo,
You are doing a michi. good for you! can't leave tai on his lonesome.
speaking of which, How does Tai talk with the bag in his mouth? it's not like they made bags back then like they do now...
Mimi's role was funny. "they were pretty good friends, since Mimi bought a bulk of her clothing there." so humorous! and the bit about Tai nearly dropping the bags. it shows how selfless Tai is.
Joe comes into the story! nice entrance. that was just TOO funny. Joe's twenty one, right?
there are green flowers? why am I quoting this? You wrote it! ... ignore me. green flower, blue spots. green flower,... blue flower, green spots. I KNEW you were going to make him screw up!
'you were staring, no gazing, at him earlier'. This sentance took me two minutes to read. first, I kept accidentally thinking 'stargazing!' why? dunno. second... no should have a comma after it. I'm so picky! ... denial. Great job bringing THAT popular subject back. Great statue.
This is getting pretty long. Anyway, summing up, I'm going to say that this was great! luv it. this is the best chapter (in humor) yet. I can't beleive anyone's capable of writing like this!
| avearia chapter 5 . 1/13/2006
chapter five. Hello again.
Confusing chapter! No offence. It's just that some things seemed to contradict what I had previously thought. whatever. Things like Matt. What happened to him keeping his guard up? that's ok, though. it just didn't seem right that he'd untangle himself so quickly and cleanly. also, there were some spelling errors like 'expect' (you meant except, right?). also, I noticed this, but you're missing several necicarry commas. Despite this, Yet, however, though, and other similar words should lead into the sentance with a series of commas. And how would Matt 'seem different' if Tk had only seen him for a second? when would he have noticed?
Now, good points? a. Tk hitting matt with a measuring stick... The mighty Meter Stick! b. Tk's disbeleif even though he knew it. c. Tk's characterisation. d. my own fault- you said 'noticed sparks flying between the two older teens' and I thought you meant yama and tai as in a fight... I was like 'duh.' um... oops. e. "The egyptians were from... greece!" f. "Shopping!" -sorry. I similarly mock my friends when they say things like that. g. your basic word choice. You don't say 'said' every sentance, a feat I know is hard to complete. So very hard. h. the way you can make it random and to the point at the same time. i. ... need to go read the next chapter. Keep faith!
| avearia chapter 4 . 1/13/2006
me again. now, this is for chapter four. (Best chapter so far! Great!)
"Does your brother know how stupid he sounds?" "Most likely not." -great characterisation, and a great quote. Kari has to have SOME opinion of her brother.
"Hi T.K.!" - FINALLY! you probably think I'm meaning something about 'takari,' but it's more complicated than that. No offence, but Tk's character had seemed a bit dull and his role a bit flat. More of the 'informative speaker/contrast-against-matt provider.' that's ok, though. sometimes he's hard to characterise.
"It dates back to the time of my great-great-great uncle's sister's cousin's grandmother's parakeet's era..." -This ... Is so wonderful! I do this sometimes. just go off into a half rant half nonsense partly caffeene induced blabber. (blushes). I'm going to quote that forever and ever.
fish phobia. alliteration. will it be foreshadowing as well? For things to come... It seemed a little short. (The story). also, Matt should have interrupted earlier, as though sora didn't have just a few more lines left to go. *my opinion*. also, on another note, I like the visual of Matt just laughing by himself at Tai and his laugh being infectious and making everyone else join in. It made me laugh too. I was busy trying to figure out if your proportions of legs/fish were wrong or my idea of Tai's mouth was wrong, and that sentence just hit me. "first Matt... began laughing."
Why'd sora bet 10 coins? if she'd have bet less, she'd have gotten some profit. seems slightly pointless. Oh well.
Great job! I am still in love with this story! ... bushy.
| avearia chapter 3 . 1/13/2006
Helly-oo! reviewing for 2&3. ok...
Still good! the second chapter was sort of uneventful, but you need to have them sometimes. Informative chapters that can't really turn into anything. it's just that the way you were setting it up, I thought Matt was going to make a fool of himself or something. oh well.
This chapter. OOH, Poor, poor Matt. "Bushy?" ... you know, that's a GREAT name for Tai. really, really great. bushy.
"I challenge you to a game of... croquet." - I told this line to my friend on the phone and she's like 'YES! that's great!' just to let you know, I agree.
I see there's going to be alot of the 'I hope we can be friends' thing in the next bit of the story. *Coughs* will Matt have a crest? Good thing you already have the next chapter up. Which reminds me, ONWARD!